Insecure Black Girl

I recently realized i wanted to write a musical. This came from many different mediums. Everything from movies and plays from a book i was reading about an authors journey through writing. All of these things combined led me to this decision. After i made that choice i had deja vou and remembered i had a similar aspiration as a young girl. Which inspired me to talk more about it and this is that,...

so i recently took a break from smoking, and this is a stream of thoughts i had surrounding my break and starting back smoking, enjoy :) also i post visuals to these conversations on youtube, so check me out on there too @dejavou111

heller in this talk i discuss topics of death, hell, subconscious actions, and sensitivity. i have been a sensitive person since the day i was born, and i have only recently started to not only accept that but honor my sensitivity and use it as my super power, which is basically what i'm discussing. I know that was a run on sentence but idc bcuz i like run on sentences and this isn't engli...

i feel like writing a description today so here you go. in this dialogue i literally admit that i don't know wtf i'm doing. so yea i beat you to it! i jump from many different topics including but not limited to the question of life, the meaning of my personal endeavors, capitalism, communal ideologies, what it means to be an artist, and the need for artistic creation and creative freedom....

its been so long omg! the title is pretty self explanatory so i won't go into a lot of detail, but i talk about my normal 1 2. whats going on, where i been, how i failed at life. And I uploaded a youtube video with this audio so if you have time check it out :) youtube channel: Dejavou111

I'm back and better! In this episode I talk about my 6 month hiatus and what caused me to take such a long break from the podcast. I have been in a period of observation that required me to sit back and listen instead of speaking. I talk about an epiphany I had about who I am and what I want out of life. I learned the true meaning of discipline hence the title of the episode. And how to move i...

Hey u guys. In this episode I go more into detail about my journey fasting and the motivation behind my fast. And how most of our physical diseases show up as spiritual/mental sickness before manifesting in our bodies. I talk about how it feels as though I'm in this transitional period and I have to make certain decisions on my own. I also dive into releasing the need of validation from others...

In this episode I talk about how I dived into my feminine energy through the use of creativity, and going with the natural flow of life. I talk about the importance of balance between both feminine and masculine energy. And how in this day and age we seem to all be unbalanced. I also go in depth about how expectations cause us so much disease. And how me embracing the idea of nothingness and relea...

Hey everyone, this episode is very special to me. This episode is centered around my 23rd birthday. I talk about what 23 means to me. What I thought my life would look like at 23 versus what it does look like. The expectations I set for myself. How I lost and found myself. What sitting in solitude over the past three years has done for me. My love for plant medicine. And some of the lessons i'...

Hey everyone! In this episode I talk about my journey to creative freedom and how allowing myself the space to be creative has opened many doors for me outside of creativity. Falling into my creative side has led me to finding my voice, learning to be open and vulnerable, and believing in the unseen. I have always been very introverted and tend to keep my talents to myself and overall down play ma...

In this episode i dive into the many ups and downs i've had with my journey in becoming a woman. From a young age i realized what was expected of me as a growing girl and it turned me off from the idea of becoming a woman. As a child I believed that being a woman was to always look presentable, not being too loud, working extremely hard, and satisfying men. I saw what was required from women b...

In this episode I breakdown my feelings of the word cringe and what it means to be cringey. I talk about how through watching some of my favorite artist be vulnerable both artistically and creatively, it allowed me to give myself freedom to authentically express myself. Even through the cringeness of it all. It further pushed me to realize just how subjective cringeness is. It brought me to a plac...

In this episode I discuss how I came to the conclusion of how everything we do is political. From the way we live our lives. To the friendships we have. The conversations we hold, and the relationships we value. Everything is political. I dissect my unhappiness with the way our country is ran and how it drove me into a depressive angry spiral. Apart of me coming out of this depressive episode was...

Hey everyone! In this episode I talk about my absences and my return. I discuss an amazing break through I had on New Yrs Eve and how it has pushed me closer to myself and my spirit. I finally understand what and who is holding me back. Very short but insightful episode, I can't really put it into words, just listen to the shit lmao. Oh and I did cry a bit, it's been a minute since i've cried on a...

In this episode, I reintroduce myself :). At this stage in my life I am changing quite fast and quite often. So I usually have differing opinions from month to month. And since I started my podcast so much of who I am and what I believe in has changed. With that being said since I just came from a two month hiatus, I figured I might as well introduce the current version of myself. I dive into my u...

Hellooooo, it feels so good to be back recording and posting podcast episodes! I truly did miss the podcast. In this episode I go into detail about my disappearance from the podcast, and what was going on in my life. During my break I moved into a new apartment and came to a few new revelations about my life. I talk about manifestation and the role it plays in my life, while also discussing how I...

Hey everyone I filmed this episode two weeks ago but couldn't bring myself to edit it. I'm so glad i did tho because while editing this episode I was able to take some of my own advice. In this episode I talk about how I prioritize my own healing. And what tools have aided me in my healing journey. I talk about forgiveness of self. I discuss shadow work and journaling along with yoga and meditatio...

Hello! This past year I've really been prioritizing my creativity, and in return I have healed a lot of different parts of myself. In this episode I talk about what my personal definition of creativity is ,and what it means to be a creator. I discuss how important creating is and allowing your creative expression to show in your everyday life. Anything that is not growing is dead. So never stop tr...

Hey everyone, I'm gonna be honest I woke up on demon time and this episode is a little sporadic lol. In this episode I discuss my opinion on roe v wade and my disdain with the supreme court justices and really the whole government. Throw the entire government away! I discuss how black women are God and the original mothers. And how as black people we all need to pull our fate out of these white in...

Hey everyone, In this episode I talk about some of the plights of being a young adult. Everyone telling you 'you have all the time in the world' while simultaneously beating the life out of you and telling you to get your ish together. I discuss the illusion of a career and the facade of money. With the economic state of America I don't believe I can record an episode without talking about capital...

Hey everyone in this episode I talk about all things drug related. I talk about weed, shrooms, alcohol, percs, xans, and whatever else you can think of. I discuss how I abused certain drugs. And the positive and negative affects these drugs had on me. I also touch on mental illness and how we can fall ill to any of these substances. I hope anyone battling an addiction gets the help they need, and...

Hey everyone! I haven't posted in a while because I've been having terrible sinus problems and unable to sit down and really record. But the show must go on! In this episode I talk about my experience with defining my sexuality and gender. I touch on other topics such as gender norms and the gender binary with a touch on respectability politics. I also talk about how racism and eugenics are at the...

Hey everyone! In this episode I talk about how sick I am of capitalism. As a young black woman in America my experience in capitalism has been less than favorable. I discuss how exploitive and unrealistic these systems really are. And how capitalism has never been for the benefit of black Americans. I also touch on the housing crisis currently going on and the ridiculous levels of inflation that w...

Hey everyone! I just recently celebrated a birthday, and in this episode I took the opportunity to reflect on some on the topics that have been on my mind. The older I get the more I am learning how important my physical AND emotional health is to living a fulfilling life. I also speak on my personal journey of slowly stepping away from western medicine and following a more holistic path. Plus the...

Hello everyone in this episode I talk about why I don't have any friends and why I really don't want any lmao. I also touch on the structure of friendship that most of us have. And what I am looking for in a friend and more importantly in myself. I hope yall enjoy this episode, peace <3.