I'M FROM THE INTERNET

A leased sports car. A strip mall office. Mangosteen juice. This Scarface-esque montage of glamor and success is tragically cut short by the hammer-like punches of German filmmaker Uwe Boll and the decade of bad business and life decisions that followed. The ending is a bummer, but there's light to be found in a community coming together to right the wrongs of its founder. This week we are joined...

We've been holding off on covering the founder of Something Awful, but with Winslow's Kickstarter in full swing it's the perfect time to rip off that bandage! We'll have some more focused narrative episodes featuring Lowtax in the future, but for now we're introducing the man with a classic chronological biography. We begin with the rise of a Vanderbilt engineering dropout into an outsized figure...

Fred Durst takes being the butt of a joke very well and the city of Austin deals with an unexpected amount of participation in local civics. This week by are joined by Adam Bumas, internet expert and Head of Research at Garbage Day. https://www.garbageday.email/ https://bsky.app/profile/bumas.bsky.social https://x.com/adambumas Get nearly 40 bonus episodes of IFTI for just $1 a month at https://ww...

We're almost a decade out from Boaty McBoatface, but there used to be a time when online polls getting brigaded was still novel. In 2011, a city of over 800,000 people let the internet vote on what to name their sanitation department. The Something Awful forums decided the funniest outcome would be to memorialize the 1999 chart-topping nu metal icon Fred Durst. This week by are joined by Adam Buma...

If trolling 4chan is pissing into an ocean of piss, then trolling PlentyOfFish is pissing into your own mouth: even if you succeed, nothing good comes of it. In 2014, a group of posters from the Something Awful forums learned this hard way. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab...

This has a happier ending than you might expect, but you have to step over a lot of soft spots in the floor to get there. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (and pictures) at https://tinyurl.com/IFTIpodGoonCPSDoc For in...

Oh so when George Costanza eats out of the trashcan it's comedy gold, but when I eat pizza off the floor it's "unsanitary"? You're just jealous I'm being served a goblet full of cough syrup by my r/hottiesfortrump wife. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review t...

Grab your coal shovels and power up your whimsical steampunk flying machines, we're going back to the SA-Mart to talk about doing arts and crafts for fun and profit. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (and pictures) at...

Months of living out of the library is starting to wear on Centripetal Horse, but with support from the forums he might be getting a new career for Christmas. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (and pictures) at https:/...

The only thing worse than unexpectedly having to live out of your car is having to live out of your car in the middle of summer in Las Vegas. With food poisoning. And no income. But at least the library has wifi, so poster Centripetal Horse can find an unlikely support network through the Something Awful forums. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.go...

What happens when you combine simmering resentment, a fear of confrontation, and the smallest public annoyance? Some very entertaining, if not slightly improbable, stories of goons using their quick wits and physical prowess to provide instant karma in the form of thrown pizzas and awkward pickup lines. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/...

Frumpykvetchbot returns nine years later in the aftermath of the murder of Kim Wall to reflect on his time with the Nautilus and dispel some of Peter Madsen's flailing excuses. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (and pi...

This episode isn't about a murder, but it is around one. Back in 2008 the OP excitedly shared stories of helping to build a submarine with an eccentric Danish visionary. Nine years later when that same submarine and visionary were making headlines around the world, the OP returned with a different perspective on their time with them. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show top...

Will Wright has been conspicuously absent from the gaming world for a generation. A little-discussed piece of 2008 games industry journalism might be at least partially responsible. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (a...

How long is a ruler? Whatever your answer, it's wrong. Poster I.M. Gei is pulled into a world of intrigue when he realizes that none of the rulers at the hardware store are accurate. Even a machinist's ruler calibrated by the National Institute of Standards and Technology is off. How deep does this rabbit hole go? As soon as we figure out how to measure things, I'll let you know. This week we're j...

Exploring breadnsucc né Doorknob Slobber's last year on the forums and the fallout of their arrest. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (and pictures) at https://tinyurl.com/IFTIPodGoonshootDoc For inquiries, contact the...

[It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia font] "That time a Something Awful Goon shot a Proud Boy" You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (and pictures) at https://tinyurl.com/IFTIPodGoonshootDoc' For inquiries, contact the show...

We conclude exploring the release of Duke Nukem Forever with some embarrassing posts from a disgraced boomer shooter creator and some fantastic posts from the best kaiju-themed film critic on the forums. For this series we are joined by gaming expert Vanessa Guerrero from Game Grumps. https://x.com/nessguerrero https://www.twitch.tv/Nesguerrero https://www.instagram.com/snesguerrero You can review...

We'll conclude Duke's Bros Forever next week. In the meantime, enjoy some comfy counter-programming as we talk about the origins of some of the most ridiculous fake PokéMon of the late-90s internet. Also I checked with Fred and Porygon is indeed the Japanese word for polygon (ポリゴン). You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyr...

The true believers are shaken by the news that Duke Nukem Forever is Not Good. Everyone else is shaken by what they learn about some of these true believers. For this series we are joined by gaming expert Vanessa Guerrero from Game Grumps. https://x.com/nessguerrero https://www.twitch.tv/Nesguerrero https://www.instagram.com/snesguerrero You can review and comment on the document for expanded show...

Duke Nukem Forever spent 14 years in development. An entire generation of gamer dudes had their hopes dashed in 2011 when it finally released to mediocre reviews and backlash from players. Thanks to Something Awful's Duke Nukem Forever thread, we can re-live that fateful moment when a bunch of gamers realized that Capture The Babe is maybe a bit problematic now that they aren't teenagers anymore....

Right at the beginning of the third wave of America's opioid crisis, the moderator of The Heroin Thread makes a series of bad calls that will define the rest of his online life. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (and p...

I'M FROM THE INTERNET and The Crackhead Clubhouse go together like morphinane alkaloids and acetyl substituents. Just like the subject of our episode! This one is less of a science lesson and more a reminder that you definitely should not do heroin. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y...

Imagine a dangerously large image. Big enough to crash a browser. Big enough to destroy websites. Over two decades ago, this image existed. And it came from the Yorba Linda Water Disctrict. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with so...

Fort Awesome is being erected. Storm clouds loom on the horizon. Forget your crysknife, we've got katanas. You can review and comment on the document for expanded show topics at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p-tyrzJOXF0m4lIrL49EW-1jIveX-4j2y14UNrnYG_Y/edit?tab=t.0 You can review this episode's document with sources (and pictures) at https://tinyurl.com/IFTIpodTexarrakisDooc For inquiries, co...