Ramsey Ess and Heather Hynes
If You're Listening
"If You're Listening" is all about one person's mission to force her friend to listen to all the music he missed in high school. Sometimes it goes well and Heather broadens her friend's horizons just a little bit. Often times it doesn't go so well and Ramsey spends the episode wondering why anyone would listen to this music, or in extreme cases, launching empty threats at the band that recorded it.
Author
Ramsey Ess and Heather Hynes
Category
Podcast website
Latest episode
Jul 6, 2026
Where to listen?
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Episodes
Jimmy Eat World "Futures" with Tom Mullen 04.06.2018 1:21:26
We've got a real barn-burner for you today as Tom Mullen of Washed Up Emo fame drops in to discuss our first three-peat band: Jimmy Eat World and their 2004 album "Futures!" We take a look at the album that could have been by checking out some secret demos and B-sides! How can something burrow into a brain in a positive way? And we get the inside scoop on the band getting cyberbullied by someone o...
Rilo Kiley "More Adventurous" 28.05.2018 1:10:52
"Ramsey... I don't think you're going to hate this!" Heather predicts at the beginning of this episode. Is she correct in this assumption? Only one way to find out! It's time for Rilo Kiley's 2004 album "More Adventurous!" We play a round of "Is this about Elliott Smith?" We talk about the brothers Gallagher and their time in Oasis! And, a very momentous occasion that is unprecedented on our show....
Motion City Soundtrack "Commit This To Memory" with Justin Cross 21.05.2018 59:28
Whoah! Heather is mildly surprised when Ramsey reveals he's actually a little bit familiar with a band! The band in question? Motion City Soundtrack and their 2005 album "Commit This to Memory," which is presented today by special guest, Justin Cross ! A rare Show Report from Ramsey! An analysis of manic pixie dream girls in which every example Ramsey gives makes Heather mad! And, what movie shoul...
Incubus "Make Yourself" 14.05.2018 1:07:57
Let's make Ramsey confront the t-shirts he saw in his youth and listen to Incubus's 1999 album "Make Yourself!" What causes Ramsey to tell a song to "knock it off?" Heather uses the word turntableist! A tale of dueling DJs! Who will win: Killmore or Life? And we hate sunscreen! All this and MORE! Don't want to end the fun? Check out our Spotify playlists for more music choices from Ramsey and Heat...
Thursday "War All the Time" with Steve Ciccarelli 07.05.2018 1:02:17
I know it's MONDAY, but today, Steve Ciccarelli is introducing Heather and Ramsey to THURSDAY! (That's the only one I'll do. I promise.) That's right, this week we will be listening to Thursday's 2003 album "War All the Time!" Regis Philbin celebrity sightings! Ramsey tries some Thursday-style screaming! Puns and air horns attack Heather! All this and MORE! Don't want to end the fun? Check out ou...
Head Automatica "Decadence" 30.04.2018 54:18
It's a sleepy Sunday morning so Heather decides that the best thing to follow last week's Glassjaw is the spin-off band Head Automatica and their 2004 debut album "Decadence." It's weird. Ramsey checks in with a very rare segment he has named "Ramsey's Show Reports!" How is this album a lot like a sandwich? (This is not a difficult riddle.) And, is this a good album to listen to while hungover? Al...
Glassjaw "Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Silence" with Chris Vespoli 23.04.2018 1:08:19
Writer, producer and performer Chris Vespoli is here to talk about Glassjaw's 2000 album "Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Silence." Guess what? It's the opposite of silence! We name a cocktail! A deeper dive into problematic lyrics! What are things that are "extreme?" And perhaps the longest discussion this podcast has had about Crohn's disease! All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on...
Counting Crows "August and Everything After" 16.04.2018 1:05:57
Heather has a theory. And she took to Twitter to test said theory. Now it's Ramsey's turn to weigh in: why do fans of emo, Heather included, love Counting Crows so much? This week we look at Counting Crows' "August & Everything After" What drive-time radio experience does Heather have? What year did this album come out in? (The answer may surprise you.) AND RAMSEY NAMES THE MONTHS AFTER SEPTEMBER....
Quicksand "Slip" with Geoff Garlock 09.04.2018 1:11:03
Geoff Garlock (comedian (UCB), guitarist (Low Estate) and bassist (Panthers and Orchid)) is here to take us post-hardcore with Quicksand's 1993 album "Slip!" How did you learn about music back when the Internet was just Yahoo? How does a glasses person go in a mosh pit? And hy is Ramsey more scared by hardcore screaming than Geoff's baby? All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future episod...
Alexisonfire "Alexisonfire" 02.04.2018 1:00:36
Oh boy! Heather and Ramsey sit down to listen to a band with no spaces in their name, Alexisonfire and their self-titled debut from 2002. (FUN FACT! It's "Alexis on fire" not "Alex is on fire.") How often does Heather leave a show early? Ramsey learns what mathy music sounds like! And why does Ramsey carry a miniature chair in his pocket? All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future episod...
Avail "4am Friday" with Dan Ozzi 26.03.2018 52:28
Dan Ozzi is back to tell us all about Avail's 1996 album "4am Friday." If you're a fan of this album, giddy up, because it doesn't really get much discussion! Learn all about all the states, both real and fake, that Heather has visited! Learn all about women's articles of clothing! And we just ate burritos which apparently makes us very goofy. All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future e...
Jack's Mannequin "Everything in Transit" 19.03.2018 1:03:54
Ramsey and Heather get all West Coasty and give Jack's Mannequin's 2005 debut album "Everything in Transit" a spin! Hear your hosts hot takes on Romeo+Juliet , One Tree Hill , and Google Images' redesign! Ramsey forces Heather to answer a March Madness bracket populated by all her favorite things! And Ramsey thinks a song is too happy?!?! All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future epis...
The Distillers "Coral Fang" with Dave Murray 12.03.2018 1:10:19
Special guest Dave Murray is here to introduce Heather and Ramsey about The Distillers and their 2003 album "Coral Fang." What was Heather's favorite Super Bowl moment? Will Ramsey shut up now about there not being any female artists in this genre? Dave gives us real life tales from the road! And is Ramsey's Australian accent offensive or just annoying? All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on...
KOЯN "Follow the Leader" 05.03.2018 1:07:40
WHY. Why why why. Heather picked KOЯN's "Follow the Leader." Ramsey had to listen to it. Usually I would write a few questions that would be answered within the episode. It's KOЯN. I had to listen to it. It goes exactly the way you would expect. KOЯN. All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future episode? Give us a rating on iTunes! It helps us, and it helps you feel good about yourself!
Midtown "Save the World, Lose the Girl" with Chris Tapp 26.02.2018 53:29
Special guest Chris Tapp is here to introduce Ramsey (and Heather!) to Midtown's 2000 album "Save the World, Lose the Girl!" Chris invents an exciting new segment for our show that changes the game! Just what is Heather's LinkedIn policy? And will the incredibly aggressive opening to this album turn scare Ramsey so much he can't enjoy the album? All this and so much MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on...
Further Seems Forever "The Moon Is Down" 19.02.2018 50:42
Ladies and gentlemen, Further Seems Forever is here to inform us that "The Moon is Down!" (There's a relatively good chance that that was nonsense to you, so to clarify, that's the name of a band and their 2001 album.) What does the guy from Dashboard sound like when he's working with other people? Is vinyl even worth it? And the eternal question: is this a Jesus-related record? All this and MORE...
Cartel "Chroma" with Alex Mason 12.02.2018 57:57
Alex Mason (Gawker, Vice, Fusion) is back to present us with Cartel's 2005 debut album "Chroma!" Music from a band that once lived in a bubble! Is this album about Jesus? Does Heather say Jesus weird? And, Ramsey's least favorite song in the history of this show (so far)! All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future episode? Give us a rating on iTunes! It helps us, and it helps you feel go...
Green Day "Dookie" 05.02.2018 51:40
Ramsey and Heather risk potential trauma and dig deep into their pasts to relive Green Day's 1994 album "Dookie!" How do both of our host's experiences with this album reflect their personalities almost 25 years later? How does a secret track change an album in the age of streaming? And Ramsey shares several unoriginal thoughts regarding this album! All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a fu...
Say Anything "...Is a Real Boy" with Neil Barlow 29.01.2018 1:20:18
This week we are joined by Neil Barlow to discuss Say Anything and their 2004 album "...Is a Real Boy." What's a stupider title for a song: "Belt" or "Bout?" How does Ramsey already know an obscure song from this band? And Heather claims she's not the biggest Say Anything Fan, but how does she justify friend of the show Jess's claim to the opposite ? All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a f...
The Format "Interventions + Lullabies" 22.01.2018 56:38
Hey! Let's have some Fun. Today we listen to The Format's debut album from 2003 "Interventions + Lullabies" and at no point do we sing or initiate either of those two things! What does a music historian do? Or an emo police officer for that matter? What vegetable does Ramsey think is on the album art for this release? And Heather is coughing a lot, but don't worry: she does not die at the end of t...
Gaslight Anthem "The '59 Sound" with Thomas Nassiff 15.01.2018 1:03:02
This week, Thomas Nassiff from Bad Timing Records joins us to listen to The Gaslight Anthem's 2008 album "The '59 Sound!" If Bruce Springsteen is "The Boss" does that make this band his employee? Two-against-Heather Star Wars prequel talk! And just how old is this band if they love 1959 so much? All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future episode? Give us a rating on iTunes! It helps us,...
New Found Glory "New Found Glory" 08.01.2018 49:12
It's just a normal Monday now and not a holiday, so let's look at New Found Glory's 2000 self-titled album! (Those two statements are not connected!) How does Heather justify having seen this band a billion times in 2017? Looking at lyrics as woke-ass adults, what's the impact of misogyny on teenage girls listening to these albums at an impressionable age? And Ramsey annoys Heather by speaking in...
Early November "For All of This" with Jill Lucas 01.01.2018 48:28
Special guest Jill Lucas is here to teach Heather and Ramsey about The Early November and their 2002 EP "For All of This." Will Ramsey make a bunch of jokes about the band's name? What about bloopers, though? And will Ramsey become obsessed with Arthur "Ace" Enders' name? All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future episode? Give us a rating on iTunes! It helps us, and it helps you feel go...
Jimmy Eat World "Clarity" 25.12.2017 1:19:20
Heather and Ramsey return to the band that gave their show their name (literally) with JIMMY EAT WORLD and their 1999 album "Clarity." Which holiday is the most appropriate one to give a niece a Spider-Man medal? Was Diddy Kong in Mario Kart? What are fall vibes? AND WHY oh WHY are song longer than nine minutes sometimes? WHO WANTS THAT? All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future episode...
The Suicide Machines "Destruction by Definition" 18.12.2017 59:56
Special guest AJ Tobey is here to introduce both Heather and Ramsey to The Suicide Machines' 1996 debut album, "Destruction by Definition!" How much ska is too much ska for Heather? Why on Earth would a record label owned by Disney put out an album called The Suicide Machines? And was everything about this band sponsored by Vans? All this and MORE! Wanna get a shout-out on a future episode? Give u...
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