How to Survive

The wheels on the bus go round and round - and if the slow down the bomb on the bus will blow up! It's Speed! Speed (1994) tells the story of Jack Travers - an LA Cop who messed with the wrong maniac. Now it's up to him to save a bus-load of people from certain doom. As soon as the bus goes above 50mph, the bomb is armed - but if it drops below 50, it's bye bye bus! We talk about cinema's least co...

This week we're covering a horror movie lover's horror movie - it's Scream 2! Scream 2 (1997) picks up a few months after the events of Scream. Sydney is now at university, but finds herself plagued anew by a marauder in a ghost face mask. As is custom, her friends are picked off one-by-one, leading to a final showdown with the killer - but who could it be? We talk about the difficulties of relyin...

Wake up Sleepyheads! It's time for the remake of a Nightmare on Elm Street! A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010) tells the story of A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984). Only this time, it's gorier, more unpleasant, less innovative, less exciting, it makes less sense, has uncomfortable themes, less appealing characters, worse special effects, a worse story, worse setting, worse characters and a worse endi...

This week we're getting wet and wild with The Poseidon Adventure! The Poseidon Adventure (1972) tells the story of a capsized super-liner travelling between New York and Athens (Greece, not Georgia). It falls to Reverend Frank Scott to help a group of misfits survive by climbing to the bottom of the ship (which is now the top...) We talk about the likelihood of suffering a fatal heart attack short...

This week we're keeping warm with The Towering Inferno! The Towering Inferno (1974) is widely considered the greatest of the run of 70s disaster movies. It tells the story of the world's tallest skyscraper, and what would happen if a huge fire started on the 80th floor, with the creme de la creme of San Francisco 50 floors above! We talk about improving the efficiency of a one-person chair lift; t...

For Episode 24, we're back in the Wild West, holding off a tribe of cannibal Native Americans. It's Bone Tomahawk! After three people are kidnapped from the town of Bright Hope by a tribe of cave-dwelling creeps, it falls to four men to save the day. They are the town sheriff, his hapless deputy, Jack from Lost and a man with a broken leg. We talk about the difficulty of bridging the gap between h...

It's Episode 23, and we're talking about the latest movie to feature Leonardo DiCaprio sleeping in a horse's carcass: The Revenant. Hugh Glass is in dire straits. He's been attacked by indians, bears and even his colleagues, and now he's been left for dead. The only thing left to do is travel across the great American wilderness, on foot, during the harshest winter imaginable. We talk about the im...

For Episode 22, we're going South - it's The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974). The film focusses on a group of teenagers on a road-trip through Texas.  The group stops to visit an old family farm house, but finds more than they bargained for when they are attacked and murdered by a 7 foot brute with a chainsaw. We talk about the importance of safety around industrial agricultural equipment; the meri...

It's Episode 21 of How to Survive and that can mean only one thing: It's Friday the 13th Part 3! The film centres around a group of teenagers who head to a campsite on a lake. Once there, they are attacked and murdered by a marauding maniac. Before you say 'that sounds familiar' you should bear in mind that this movie is very different because Jason wears a new mask. We talk about the thin but imp...

This week we're talking about a 2015 Horror/Comedy based (very loosely) on the Scandinavian legend of Krampus! Krampus (2015) tells the story of a family who have lost their Christmas spirit. Despite the best efforts of the the youngest child, Max, to generate some festive cheer, the group are punished for forgetting the true meaning of Christmas by a shadowy demon called 'Krampus' We talk about t...

  This week we're talking about the movie that made Macaulay Culkin the man he is today... it's Home Alone! Home Alone (1990) tells the story of Kevin McCallister, an eight year old boy left alone (at home...) for the Christmas holiday. Which would probably have been fine, were it not for the marauding burglars attempting to break into his house. We talk about why Kevin McCallister is an ideal Tre...

This movie is also known as 'Blackfoot Trail' in some territories. If you haven't seen it, head to howtosurviveshow.com to find a link to your own copy. The movie is from the fringes of the horror genre, but is more than welcome in a discussion about movie survival. Backcountry (2014) tells the story of two hikers, Jenn and Alex, who become badly lost in the Canadian Wilderness. They manage to kee...

This week we're talking about the head, the tail, the whole damn thing... it's Jaws! Steven Spielberg's Jaws (1975) was the first summer blockbuster - and what a blockbuster it was! Jaws tells the story of Police Chief Martin Brody, and his attempts to keep the island town of Amity safe from a marauding great-white with a taste for tourists. We talk about the questionable business acumen displayed...

It's the catchiest thing to come from monkeys since 'I'm a believer': It's 28 Days Later. Danny Boyle's 2002 classic is as influential as any 'zombie' film before or since. A massively impactful, bleak and visually astounding movie which takes you on an emotional rollercoaster from start to finish. We talk about the survival limitations of a high population density; the difficult of catching an ou...

It's Episode 15 of How to Survive, and we're off to the shops!  This week's focus is on Dawn of the Dead (1978), George A. Romero's classic zombie movie where the action goes down in an American shopping mall. The movie is perhaps more satirical than terrifying - especially by modern standards, but it still holds up as a classic movie, and a massively influential horror. We talk about the benefits...

Episode 14 of How to Survive is out of this world! We're talking about survival tactics for Matt Damon in The Martian (2015). The Martian tells the story of Mark Watney, a Mars astronaut who is left behind on the planet after an accident. He must spend the next few years surviving against the brutal Martian elements while his pals at NASA think of a way to get him home. We talk about how believabl...

It's episode 13 of How to Survive, and we're giving survival advice to the most enduring British film character ever: James Bond. In Spectre, Bond takes on someone from his past - the notorious Franz Oberhauser! In a movie which at times feels like a remake of the entire Bond saga at the same time, and never seems to be 5 minutes away from gut-churning action, the risks are high, and survival is s...

Episode 12 of How to Survive sees us talking about John Carpenter's Halloween (1978). This is our annual Halloween Special!  The movie is absolutely iconic for its key elements - many of which have now become horror movie tropes. Certainly a product of its time, but a fantastic film to discuss - especially when considering how to survive about the original horror movie slasher: Michael Myers. We t...

In the eleventh episode of How to Survive, Chris and Joe return to the Friday the 13th saga, with Friday the 13th Part II. The film is a facsimile of the first film in terms of: characters, themes, writing, expectations. However, it is nonetheless a great film to discuss - particularly when considering how to survive. We talk about all the equal opportunities Jason affords people of all physical a...

This week, Chris and Joe are talking about Titanic (1997), and how they would survive if they found themselves aboard the doomed voyage. Titanic is a part love-story, part disaster movie, part horror, part survival movie, part historical drama and part documentary. An emotional roller coaster which secured its place as the biggest blockbuster in history (...until Avatar came and blue it all up). W...

This week, Chris and Joe are talking about Everest (2015). The high-action retelling of the '1996 Mount Everest Disaster'. In a break from usual form, this episode was deemed inappropriate for analysis of 'how to survive'. The film tells the story of real people who were qualified professionals in climbing. It would be an insult to their expertise - and their memories if we (non-climbing experts) ...

This week, Chris and Joe are talking about The Hills Have Eyes (1977), and how they would survive if they found themselves lost in the desert, hunted by a family of mutant cannibals!  In memorial of master of modern horror, Wes Craven, we're digging into one of his most famous movies - and tearing it to shreds.  The Hills Have Eyes is shocker-horror at its finest (and simultaneously at its worst)....

This week, Chris and Joe are talking about A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), and how they would survive if they found their dreams invaded by the demonic child murderer, Freddy Krueger! In memorial of master of modern horror, Wes Craven, we're digging into the movie which is undoubtedly his most lasting legacy - and tearing it to shreds.  A Nightmare on Elm Street is one of the classics of modern...

This week, Chris and Joe are talking about The Loved Ones (2009), and how they would survive if they were strapped to a chair and tortured with power tools! Don't be mistaken - The Loved Ones isn't full on torture-porn (though it does stray into that territory). This is a story of shocks, survival, and unsettling surprises. If you haven't seen the film, watch it now. It's a hysterical thriller whi...

This week, Chris and Joe are taking on an obsessive fan - it's 1990's classic horror, Misery! Misery is adapted from a Stephen King novel of the same name, and tells the story of Paul Sheldon (James Caan), a writer who is kidnapped by his number one fan - Annie Wilkes (Kathy Bates in an Oscar winning performance). As this thriller progresses, the question turns from survival to escape, making it a...