History That Doesn't Suck

“Any man who took Lincoln for a simple-minded man would wind up with his back in a ditch.” This is the story of America on the eve of the Civil War. Kentucky-born farmboy Abraham Lincoln has an interesting early life. Between losing his mom as a child, suffering from chronic depression, and receiving little formal education, you might not think he’d become one of the youngest state legislators in...

“Master Bass, if justice had been done, I never would have been here.” This is the story of betrayal. Restoration. Human trafficking. Daring selflessness. Oppressive inhumanity. Hope. And Forgiveness. A talented carpenter, driver, and violinist, Solomon Northup lives a happy life with his wife and three kids in upstate New York. The unassuming, kind-hearted man doesn’t think twice when offered goo...

“We can send five thousand--enough to kill every God-damned abolitionist in the Territory.” This is the story of the Civil War’s warm up. The States are increasingly dividing along northern and southern (anti-slavery and pro-slavery) lines, and this tension is coming out in spades in Kansas. Northerners want to see it become a free state; Southerners want it to be a slave state. The 1854 Kansas-Ne...

“In the history of the world, the doctrine of Reform had never such scope as at the present hour.” “Resolved, That woman is man’s equal.” This is the story of social reform. Europe is swept up in calls for reform and greater democracy. France is having another revolution! Those same thoughts are sweeping through the United States, leading to calls for better treatment in prisons, public education,...

“The Union is doomed to dissolution. … I fix its probable occurrence within twelve years or three presidential terms.” This is the story of statehood and compromise. California is booming. The gold rush is in full swing with Americans and immigrants from all over the world hoping to make their fortune. But it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Nature and the miners show their violent sides. With suc...

“I am your fellow man, but not your slave, Frederick Douglass.” This is the story of self-education, self-emancipation, overcoming adversity, bad and good luck, and the abolitionist cause. Born into slavery in Maryland, Frederick is ripped from his mother, never knows his father, but quickly realizes the power of literacy. Against the odds, the Baltimore-living youth teaches himself to read and wr...

“Give us free! Give us free!” This is the story of a daring slave rebellion at sea and the long road to freedom. This is the story of La Amistad. It’s 1839, and the international slave trade is illegal, but that doesn’t mean it’s over. Hundreds of kidnapped and stolen souls are forcefully taken from Africa to Cuba aboard the Teçora. Upon their arrival on the Spanish isle, Pépé Ruiz and Pedro Monte...

No, no, no, no--Cortes would’ve gotten his butt whooped if he had not gained lots of indigenous help.” -Josh It’s time to end Volume III: “The Age of Jackson!” We have more corrections on Greg’s pronunciation (and on fracking!), an Antarctic email (no joke), other updates, and--of course--historical analysis to tie together the whole volume. We’re talking Andrew Jackson’s presidency, the extension...

This is the story of the Mexican-American War’s end and the making of Mexican heroes. Winfield Scott is closing in on Mexico City. Battles rage as Mexican troops defend, but General Scott can’t be stopped. American troops even snag one of Santa Anna’s spare prosthetic legs! But sometimes loss can be the breeding ground of heroes, and that’s just what happens as US forces close in on Mexico’s capit...

“By God, that does looked forked!” This is the story of further American advancements through Northern Mexico and the start of its final invasion from the Gulf Coast. General Stephen Kearney’s descending upon New Mexico. He’ll take the territory without firing a shot, but that doesn’t mean violence isn’t coming. The Taos Revolt will lead to a beheaded American Governor and the execution of New Mex...

“Who the devil is Governor of California?’” This is the story of covert ops, secret orders, fake identities, rebellion, and conquest; this is the story of California’s annexation. John C. “the Pathfinder” Frémont is out on another surveying expedition. But something’s off ... why’s he making trouble with the Californio government? And why is an undercover messenger traveling from DC to Oregon Coun...

“Hostilities may now be considered as commenced.” This is the story of the Mexican-American War’s beginnings. President James Polk is annexing Texas (much to Mexico’s chagrin). But does Texas end at the Nueces River? Or the Rio Grande? Whatever your view, this won’t be settled with words. Welcome to the story, General Mariano Arista and General Zachary “Old Rough and Ready” Taylor. ____ Connect wi...

“Nits will make lice, and if he had lived he would have become a Mormon.” This is the story of our last major pioneer migration out west; it’s also the story of America’s largest homegrown faith: Mormonism. Growing up in the “burned-over district” of America’s Second Great Awakening, it’s not too surprising that upstate New York farmer Joseph Smith has his mind on God. But with a new book of scrip...

“Never take no shortcuts.” This is the story of one of the larger Oregon Trail’s most important branches: the California Trail. The Mexican province of Alta California has some beautiful land, so it’s not hard to see why west-bound Americans might want to make their home there. We’ll hear about newly independent Mexico’s struggles to support Alta California; why American Commodore “Tac” Jones mist...

“You damn Yankees will do anything you like.” This is the story of the Oregon Trail, including the reasons pioneers crossed it and the trail’s development. As President Andrew Jackson leaves us and we fly through presidents in rapid succession (RIP President William Harrison), the US is going through the worst economic slump it’ll see until the Great Depression. A mixture of financial urgency and...

“Now let’s see how Santa Claus will treat you, Mr. Uncle Jackson, President of all these United States!”  This is the story of Christmas at the Jackson White House in 1835. Andrew’s going (as he often does) to visit a local Washington DC orphanage. He’s giving out gifts like the skinniest Santa you’ve ever seen. Then it’s back to the White House, where: six young Jackson/Donelson children are hopi...

"Come and take it!” This is the story of Andrew Jackson’s ongoing Administration and the Texas Revolution. Old Hickory is up for reelection, and his opponent, Henry Clay, bets the bank--the Bank of The United States--on his ability to beat Andrew. It’s not going to end well for him, but it will help those who dislike Andrew and his Democrats to form a party of their own: the Whigs. Welcome back to...

“May God Almighty forgive her murderers as I know she forgave them. I never can.” This is the story of a democratizing America. John Quincy Adams barely has his presidency off the ground and Andrew Jackson’s “common man” crew is already starting his presidential campaign. This election gets ugly fast as each side tells lies so vicious it’s possible they cause or contribute to Rachel Jackson’s deat...

"There were no Canadians hurt in the making of this last volume." This is not a story. This is our second epilogue! Greg, Josh, and Cielle hash about the great birthing pains of launching the new podcast, "Office Hours," the HTDS podcast in general, and what they consider to be the big takeaways from volume II (episodes 16-27). Enjoy! ____ Connect with us on HTDSpodcast.com and go deep into episod...

“Thomas Jefferson survives.” This is the story of reconciliation--and death. With peace abroad and the collapse of the Federalist Party, the United States seems to be out of crisis mode. Reconciled even. President James Madison’s got so much consensus, one newspaper’s calling this the “era of good feelings.” But there are still important developments and conflicts. The Supreme Court’s setting new...

“I could have walked on the dead bodies of the British for one-quarter of a mile without stepping on the ground.” This is the story of peace and war; of self-destruction and political birth. American and British negotiators are hashing out a peace treaty in Ghent, Belgium. The War of 1812 is over! But funny things can happen when word of the treaty’s signing hasn’t made it back to the US. Some out...

“Does that star-spangled banner yet wave?” This is the story of the worst of the War of 1812 for America--the year 1814. As the threat of Napoleon’s crumbling empire subsides, the British military has more ships and thousands of men available to fight against the United States. This means Canada’s getting reinforced and the British blockade on America’s east coast is extending. But the worst of it...

“Don’t give up the ship!”  This is the story of the first two years of the War of 1812, and it seems quite backward. Despite expectations, the Americans are trying and failing (miserably) to invade Canada. The only thing more confusing is that the US Navy is holding its own against the British on the high seas ... well, at first, that is. Several major events happen in these two years: Indian coal...

“We’ll root out the damn’d tories. We’ll drink their blood. We’ll eat their hearts!” This is the story of the path to war--the War of 1812. The United States is stuck between a rock and a hard place: Britain and Napoleonic France. The two empires are seizing American ships amid a large-scale throwdown. Britain’s going one step further; it’s impressing thousands and thousands of American sailors in...

"Adieu best of wives and best of Women. Embrace all my darling Children for me." This is the story of the most influential duel in American History: Vice President Burr versus General Hamilton. Aaron is down on his luck. He's an outgoing, lame-duck Vice President who's just lost the New York gubernatorial election... and word is Alex's been talking smack. Alex is down on his luck. He's an out-of-t...