here's what I hear

In this part 2 of a two part series I share with you the final 4 of 7 tips that can improve the relationships in your life. In my work as a relationship counselor and coach I've helped many clients over come their challenges and barriers using these strategies. I also use these in my personal life and I find them to be immensely helpful. Part One #1 Develop Your Emotional Self Awareness #2 St...

In this part 1 of a two part series I share with you 3 of 7 tips that can improve the relationships in your life. In my work as a relationship counselor and coach I've helped many clients over come their challenges and barriers using these strategies. I also use these in my personal life and I find them to be immensely helpful. #1 Develop Your Emotional Self Awareness #2 Stop Criticizing #3 V...

First off, I want to acknowledge my lack of consistency with releasing episodes this summer. That's not my intention but I've also been embracing a different routine with open hands. Perhaps it would be best to say I'll be releasing future episodes periodically with the hope of getting back to every other week in the coming months. I appreciate you and if you've been following...

There are all sorts of issues and problems we face in relationships - communication shortcomings, over crossed boundaries, rebuilding trust, resolving conflict, increasing intimacy, and many more. For all of these issues there are countless solutions we can use to try and improve in these areas. One skill I find to be most impactful is the practice of Mindfulness. In this episode I talk about what...

Anger, what a daunting emotion to understand and get to know within us. We all have anger within us, we all have things that activate this emotion on a regular basis - often times a daily basis. Sometimes anger gets the best of us and it's hard to control how we let our anger out and then it comes out in hurtful, destructive, or harmful ways. In this episode I want to share with you a framewo...

In this episode I talk about what it means to be self-actualized and how trauma affects this concept. So often I talk with people wrestling with over coming trauma and inevitably that trauma has effected their relationships. I want to share with you what I have learned and come to experience both personally and professionally about the power of self and the importance of becoming authentically You...

In this episode I share about my recent processing around grief. I've experience some family members passing in the last month as well as some other forms of grief that has really got me reflecting on my own grief process. So, I want to share a bit about that with you. First I think it's important we understand a bit about why we grieve and how grief is a unique emotion. Secondly, I give...

In many of the relationships I work there is often a man who is struggling significantly with identity, purpose, and life satisfaction. Now, just because the title of this episode is geared for men, what I want to share I believe can be helpful for anyone who has a man in their life - whether it be a romantic partner, a family member, friend, or colleague.  I find that many men struggle with what...

Fighting in relationships can be exhausting, defeating, and decrease the satisfaction in the relationships. So why do couples fight and continue to fight? In this episode I share three of the unique factors in romantic relationships that contribute to the perfect breeding grounds for frequent fighting. And guess what? It's actually a GOOD thing that you fight! Of course, there is a difference...

Let's face it, making and maintaining friends as a adult is not as simple as we'd like. I've talked with so many clients and friends, and personally experienced this reality too - adult friendships leave a lot to be desired. More and more I am convinced that we are becoming less and less connected, yet, desiring community more than ever before. So, in this episode I share what I bel...

In this part 3 three episode I wrap (pun intended) up the short series about How to Manage Family Drama During the Holidays. If you haven't listened to parts 1 and 2 I highly recommend going back and giving those a listen as well but you don't have to listen to them in order so since you're here now, give this a listen. In this episode I talk all about what YOU can do to improve tim...

Understanding your own conflict style, the conflict styles of those you are in relationship with, and more healthy conflict styles is an vital part of managing family drama during the holidays. In this episode I talk about 5 conflict styles: Avoiding Accommodating Competing Compromising Collaborating I talk about the down falls of each and also the benefits of each. I also share why and when I thi...

In this episode I talk about the very normal and real relationship challenges which often come up with greater intensity during the holidays. Family is one of the most challenging relationship dynamics to work through, especially when it is with family members who you want to continue to have a relationship with. In this multi part topic I first start by sharing the skill of self reflection. I hop...

In this episode I talk about the importance of setting boundaries in all relationships. Did you know that boundaries are an important part even in healthy relationships? Boundaries aren't just for toxic or negative relationships, they help us thrive in all relationships. Setting healthy boundaries first starts with be honest with ourselves. Are we clear with ourselves and committed internally...

On today's episode I had the pleasure of speaking with friend and colleague Amy Morrison from True Core Health. Amy is a wellness specialist and Licensed Professional Counselor in Colorado. She specializes in helping individuals and groups connect with their true self through slowing down with breath work, understanding and regulating the nervous system, and mental wellness. As a Certified Co...

Today I have a special episode to share! I was a guest on my wife's podcasts heal & go public . We talked about what to do in relationships when you feel like you are moving at different paces or in different directions with beliefs and spirituality. We also talk about divorce and how to navigate these challenging topics with a partner. Also, be sure to check out Carin's (my wife) wo...

How many times recently have you told someone this or heard this from someone else - "are you evening listening to me?!" I believe that every couple and individuals in any type of relationship have had this phrase come up more than once. The reality is, one of the biggest sources of relationship conflict is poor listening skills. This is because we are not born with good listening skills...

In this episode I share about the skill of asking yourself the hardest questions you can imagine. I find that many people are more afraid of asking hard questions than the answer. I believe your internal dialogue can teach us a lot when we venture into the space of what if? . This doesn’t mean that you have to answer the question one way or another. It doesn’t even mean that the answer you initial...

The lack of self care is one of the biggest personal issues I find many struggle with in relationships and this makes a lot of sense because if we are running dry, how can we expect to show up in a healthy and constructive way? In this episode I talk about the concept of hardness and softness. I shared about my own journey being aware of these tendencies in myself through a recent self care practi...

When is self confidence a good thing and when does it become over the top? In this episode I share a bit about my own personal journey with confidence, arrogance, and finding my way back to what it means to have a healthy amount of self confidence. I also talk about the reality that even when done appropriately, confidence can still come off abrasive and that’s not up to you to really take on.

In this part 2 episode I continue the discussion about the challenging process of rebuilding trust in relationships. This is a theme I hear a lot of individuals and couples struggling with so I want you to know you are not alone.  I want to share with you more about the concept from Gottman called ATTUNE. Part one covered Awareness, Turning Toward, and Tolerance. Part two covers Understanding, Non...

In this episode I talk about the very real, frequent, and challenging work on rebuilding trust in relationships. This is a theme I hear a lot of individuals and couples struggling with.  I shared about a helpful concept from Gottman called ATTUNE and I break the topic into two parts. In this part one I discuss the steps and skills of Awareness, Turning Toward, and Tolerance.  If you enjoyed the ep...

If you’ve ever worked toward a goal, you know the feeling when progress starts to stall. Perhaps you’ve been making a lot of progress, even faster than anticipated, then BOOM almost out of nowhere progress grinds to a halt. This is true in our relationships and certainly true in counseling and coaching. In this episode I share the reality that progress is never linear, our human nature minimizes p...

Everyday there are false messages we’ve come to believe and tell ourselves internally or hear externally - sometimes implicitly and sometimes explicit. Three of the most common false messages I hear are perfectionism, all or nothing, and finding worth in others. If you enjoyed the episode I would love to hear what you think. Leave a review! Want to work with me? Schedule a discovery call   Interes...

One of the key defining differences between masters of relationships and disasters of relationships according to Gottman is kindness. Being kind to others and having a posture of kindness is SO important. Listen along as I talk about the 5:1 ration and how to be kind to others and to yourself. If you enjoyed the episode I would love to hear what you think. Leave a review! Want to work with me? Sch...