Grieving Voices

Bill Gross, the founder of the non-profit Farm Rescue, has been traveling the world with his career as a UPS pilot for the past 30 years. However, his heart never left or forgot the farm he called home in ND. He knew he wanted to give back to ND farmers once he retired; however, a chance conversation prompted him to ask himself: "Why wait?" We don't know what our future has in store...

It happens often; we hear people say they want or need closure. We also hear it on crime shows and true crime documentaries, too. However, what feels more accurate, and what would be a more helpful expression of what those left behind genuinely desire? Listen to this quick Q&A on closure and discover why it's unhelpful and what would be a more accurate goal to aim for when grieving. Sudde...

Susana is no stranger to grief. As a young child, she was a victim of sexual abuse. As a young adult, she lost her mother, later becoming her father's caretaker, only to eventually lose him. The death of her nephew to suicide was when she realized that she could do something - that she needed to do something. Susana would put her strengths, skills, training as a Certified Grief Recovery Speci...

The question on today's podcast is one I have heard a lot and one I've also asked myself if I'm being honest. It's normal and natural to ask ourselves questions like this, and it doesn't mean that you mean any ill will towards others. It also doesn't mean other people are "bad"; bad things should happen to them instead. I see this question as an expression o...

Jill's father walked out of their home when she was sixteen months old and didn't return. He died in a plane crash, and her life was forever changed. Fortunately, her mental health was of the utmost importance, having received counseling and therapy throughout her childhood and adulthood. During that time, the groundwork was being laid to prepare her, or as Jill would say, God was prepar...

In this first Q&A episode, Ruth asks why she's struggling more with her spouse's death than the death of her parents. In my response, I share a perspective you may find helpful when considering your losses. Whether you've been married for five, fifteen, or forty years, or your parents died when you were young or in your fifties, death may finalize the physical relationship; howe...

What is to come in 2023 for Grieving Voices? Tune in to this episode to find out all of the details. Before you listen, I want to share that this episode came to be after months and months of stewing and contemplation, trying to logically come to a resolution of what to do about Grieving Voices. Should I stop podcasting? Take a sabbatical? I wasn't sure, and the answer certainly was not comin...

What does family mean to you ? Who makes up your family? Not only those you claim by blood but those you choose , who show up when life throws curveballs? There are reasons to grieve family; the family you wish you had and even the family you may wish you didn't have, too. We can't choose our family, but we have a say in their role in our lives. And, when a family is made up of less-than...

When you fill out your calendar, do you intentionally set time aside to reflect and for introspection? Probably not. Most of us don't do so. However, as Kevin shares in this episode, doing so for his grief has made all of the difference in his life. Kevin speaks to the cumulative losses of his career, his father, his mother, and subsequent divorce. He also shares the impact of having a small...

Grief is cumulative, and it's cumulatively negative. Every loss we experience stacks on top of those before it. For Genesis Amaris Kemp, attending funerals started becoming a regular occurrence. Add the loss of loved ones before the Covid pandemic (and during) to the loss of a job during the same timeframe, and it can be challenging to find solid footing. Additionally, learning, for the first...

Was your childhood filled with joy and surrounded by love and support? There may have been some challenging times for your parents or even for you, but what if you indeed did have the ideal life? Dan's childhood was amazing. So when grief hit home hard, and hard it did, he was ill-prepared. He had experienced the death of his grandparents, but even then, there was little discussion about deat...

Melissa's episode embodies several different ways one may experience grief. And as she shares each story, she also provides insight into loss from her perspective as a clinical psychologist. At age 4, her older sister (age 7) died of leukemia. Melissa's earliest memories are related to her sister battling leukemia for eighteen months and being bounced from house to house while her parent...

We are all going to die. However, none of us know when, although some may know how (as with a terminal illness). One thing we can do for ourselves and our loved ones, not knowing when our last day will come, is to prepare for it. We will spare our loved ones from making many complex (and conflicting) decisions. You can be your own hero and that of your loved ones by taking ownership of your life a...

Tim's grief was compounded by the loss of his best friend and then-wife within a year of each other. It's enough to send anyone into a tailspin as it did for Tim.  He found himself at the lowest point in his life. Grief-stricken, he found solace in a bottle until a friend asked him if he thought he had been drinking too much. From then on, he considered his path and decided to change his...

 According to Johns Hopkins, 240,000 medical error deaths occur every year. Betsy learned that when it comes to the healthcare system and being a caregiver, becoming informed and a fierce advocate is the only option. Betsy learned real-life experience about medical advocacy while her husband survived prostate cancer, only to be diagnosed with bone marrow cancer five years later. Four years after h...

What do you want to happen if you are incapacitated while on your deathbed or after you die? If you don't have a will, that decision may be left up to the state.  These are big questions that often don't have answers for those who are left behind. In the most emotional moments, the family is left to make decisions that weren't theirs. Each of us has a responsibility, not only to our...

There are two camps of grievers; those who talk about their grief and share their stories and those who keep their grief and stories hidden. Regardless of the camp, you find yourself in, there is one common denominator that is often present with most, if not all, grievers - anger. There is a caveat to sharing your story, though. As we look for meaning in our experiences, including those that cause...

Christian is one of nine children born and raised in Cuba during turbulent times and in the Catholic faith. His parents instilled in him the importance of excelling and reading. These early lessons laid a foundation. However, those lessons also set the stage for a desire to escape and not be seen. Introversion and depression plagued his adolescence, as was his knowledge of being gay. With courage,...

Less than 1% of Americans serve in the U.S. military. That leaves 99% of Americans who will never understand the cost of serving their country, particularly during wartime. Scott shares his path to emotional freedom from the scars of war after deploying to Afghanistan with his brother, Steven. Rather than Scott celebrating homecoming with his brother, he accompanied Steven, killed in action, in a...

Every human being experiences trauma to some degree. We don't have to experience "Big T Traumas" for those experiences to leave an imprint on our hearts and bodies. At age 5, Kimberly had such an experience after witnessing her father physically abuse her mother while she and her older sibling were present. And, because they were in a vehicle, there was nowhere to run or hide. After...

People say you have to move on or that you should "be over it by now." However, no one tells you or shows you how to do it. For me, after struggling to get beyond the pain of my trauma and losses for 30+ years, the Grief Recovery Method was the how . Naysayers and doubters are welcome. 🤗 I was a skeptic, too. How could a process or method help me move on from the pain after sitting in i...

They say it's unnatural to lose a child. And, there's no word for a parent who has lost a child other than griever, which somehow doesn't embody all a parent experiences—much less childless parents. What is a word for a parent whose only child dies? As it turns out, there's maybe only one that might describe that inconsolable feeling - lost.  Phil found himself lost in an ocean...

Reid is the creator of the Grief Refuge app and supports grievers through publishing daily audio messages that soothe and comfort people pained by grief. Grief is something Reid grew up knowing well. As a young adult, his biological father, who struggled with alcohol abuse, died by suicide. Fortunately, his stepfather came into his life as a child and was a positive influence. However, grief would...

They say it's unnatural for a parent to outlive and bury a child. Likewise, it's not natural for a child to bury their parent. There is no hierarchy of loss. We all grieve at 100%, and there are no half-grievers. Therefore, all losses are felt at 100%, too. So, who's to say what loss is worse than the next? However, for a moment, put yourself in the shoes of a child who buries a par...

Finding our way home to self is the journey we’re all on in the physical plain. So that hopefully, when our time is drawing near, we will have experienced a life well-lived. A life filled with joy and more importantly, one of peace. In this week's episode, I share a bit about my journey finding my way home back to myself. And also discuss the stories of the three previous guests and a snippet...