Good Children

Today we're joined by the icon who made this podcast possible: Ilana Glazer. We discuss growing up on Long Island, weed-induced anxiety attacks, motherhood, working with your best friend, and Ilana's latest project; "Human Magic" out December 20th on Hulu & Disney+. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Ke...

Is it ethical to raise children under the threat of Santa Claus? Today we join Buddy the Elf and Santa Claws himself for a discussion on Santa Claus... the good.. the bad.. and the freaks! Go to ROCKETRX.COM and enter code: GOODCHILDREN at checkout for 40% off your first order. Terms and conditions apply. Join the Patreon community for a brand new episode every Thursday night: patreon.com HOSTS: J...

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR! Chicago, Indianapolis, and Madison tickets here! Join us on Patreon for a bonus episode every Thursday night! Head to FACTORMEALS.com/50goodchildren and use code 50goodchildren to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping! Today we join Nora and Luther Krank as they prepare for the surprise homecoming of their grown-ass daughter Blair, who ruins their beautiful Virgin Voya...

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR! Chicago, Indianapolis, and Madison tickets here! Join us on Patreon for a bonus episode every Thursday night! 🏕️ GIVEAWAY ALERT! 🏕️This week, we’re taking you along on our getaway to Postcard Cabins in Machimoodus, CT— where we unplug and get back in touch with ourselves 🌲✨ AND, because we loved it so much, we’re giving THREE lucky listeners the chance to win a 2-night stay...

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR!! Chicago, Indianapolis, and Madison tickets HERE! Today Joe explains why fish are birds, we discuss Thanksgiving as a concept, and the boys ideate on a new ice cream flavor that will change the trajectory of their lives. For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! Use code GOODCHILDREN at RocketRX.com for 40% off your...

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR!! Chicago, Indianapolis, and Madison tickets HERE! For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! RECORDED PRE-ELECTION: Today we discuss the technicalities of what it means to be a gay person, from coming to terms to coming out. Use code GOODCHILDREN at RocketRX.com for 40% off your first order: https://rebrand.ly/6615b2...

An early release for some much needed distraction right about now

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR!! Chicago, Indianapolis, and Madison tickets here! For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! Today, we’re diving into the wild aftermath of weekend debauchery—why we keep saying “never again” but somehow still show up in the same places every Friday night. We’re talking side effects of partying that nobody tells you...

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR!! Chicago, Indianapolis, and Madison tickets here! For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! This week we listen to horror stories from our beautiful, sexy, gorgeous Patrons and then share a few of our own! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR!!  Chicago, Indianapolis, and Madison tickets here: https://linktr.ee/goodchildren!   For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month: https://www.patreon.com/goodchildrenpod   This week the boys sit down to discuss taking a sick day, something they haven't done since May 4th, 2022. Andrew breaks down his will to cheat in r...

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR!! PRESALE CODE ON PATREON!Chicago, Indianapolis, & Madison, you're up firstGet your tickets here! For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month. Get ready to SWEAT, this week we’re talking about Charli xcx, Troye Sivan, and other dynamic duos. We also get into our own personal best friends, sharing stories and reflections...

For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month: https://www.patreon.com/goodchildrenpod This week, Agatha Cromwell sits down with her granddaughter Marnie Piper for the first time publicly since 2004 in a shockingly tense, no-holds-barred conversation about the state of their family, the nation, and their future, mere weeks before Agatha is d...

For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month @ goodchildrenpod! We're talking about fall/Gilmore Girls/apple picking for the third consecutive year in a row but this time our opinions fall into a slightly more controversial category. Is apple picking really worth the hype? What exactly does it mean to pick a pumpkin? Is Rory Gilmore apoliti...

For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! This week we're joined by the iconic Yasmine Sahid for a discussion on Disney Channel and destiny. In what has been described, by us, as the best episode of the podcast, Yasmine recounts auditions as a child, the expectations vs. reality of moving to LA, and her most toxic job.  Upgrade your war...

For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! This week we discuss the trials and tribulations of early college years. From standardized testing to public bathrooms, messy roommates, and everything in between. For FREE breakfast for life go to HelloFresh.com/freegoodchildren! Go to ROCKETRX.COM and enter code: GOODCHILDREN at checkout for 2...

For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! This week we take you on a retrospective of some of our favorite family vacations, including the fateful trip to Orlando where Andrew surprised Joe on his 14th birthday.  Be your most comfortable self this fall with MeUndies. Get 20% off your first order, plus free shipping, at MeUndies.com/good...

For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! This week we are joined by the legendary man behind the greenscreen: Kelon Campbell, face of Terri Joe. We chat about growing up gay, doing scary things, vampires, ghosts, mediums, and Madonna.  Head to CRAPEYEWEAR.COM/GOODCHILDREN and enter code: GOODCHILDREN at checkout for 25% off your first...

For a bonus episode every Friday plus access to 100+ extra episodes, join us on Patreon for $7 a month! This week we talk about the diet culture of the 2000s that made us the insecure freaks we are today. From Weight Watchers to Jenny Craig all the way down to South Beach and Atkins. PLUS: another harrowing story from Andrew.  Head to CRAPEYEWEAR.COM/GOODCHILDREN and enter code: GOODCHILDREN at ch...

Get exclusive bonus episodes every Friday for $7 a month on Patreon! Today we just rank some fruit to be honest. Call in for advice or with a question at (516) 366-0826! Get 20% off your first order at MeUndies, plus free shipping, at MeUndies.com/goodchildren. Get free breakfast FOR LIFE, just by going to HelloFresh.com/freegoodchildren. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/...

Get exclusive bonus episodes every Friday for $7 a month on Patreon! Another episode about bottoming what else is new? This week we cover some sensitive subjects about sensitive areas... PLUS: TikTok Shop, Crumbl Cookies, gooning, coconut oil, girth extenders, African Net Sponges, vegetables in orifices, Andrew's dating life, and proper hygiene. Call in for advice or with a question at (516) 366-0...

Get exclusive bonus episodes every Friday for $7 a month on Patreon. After discovering a new archive of home videos, Joe comes to the crushing realization that he is quickly hurtling toward the same age his parents were when they started having children. What follows is a chaotic, heavy, and strange conversation about the inescapable reality of getting older, just in time for Joe's birthday. Call...

This week is all about our favorite subject: food. We talk foods we love, foods we hate, our last meals, our most recent meals, and, randomly, imposter syndrome in your early 20s. Call in: (516) 366-0826 Get exclusive bonus episodes every Friday for $7 a month on Patreon! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Get access to BONUS episodes every Friday on Patreon! This week let's talk about weed induced psychosis! The boys share their most unhinged weed stories including hallucinations, Snapchat stories, and an ill-fated first date to The Hamptons.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

BONUS episodes every week on Patreon! This week we're joined by TV and social media star, Boman Martinez-Reid AKA Bomanizer, whose new comedy docuseries, "Made For TV" premieres on Crave on Friday, July 12th. Boman takes us on mental tour of Canada, reveals intimate secrets about condiments, makes us jealous of his performing arts high school, and finally solves the Alessia Cara mystery.  Learn mo...

BONUS episodes every week on Patreon! Take off your shoes and grab the rumplemintz, this week we go back to college to learn more about Andrew’s acapella experience. From an stress-inducing audition process to a devastating hazing ritual, it takes a lot to be famous on campus. Plus, we revisit our fourth grade chorus solo, Andrew’s major choir disaster, and Joe’s deeply troubling history of cover...