Forgiveness Is For YOU - Overcome Trauma Through Forgiveness

In this episode, I examine how our thoughts, words, and actions in unforgiveness can result in sin that we may not even be aware of committing. I also caution against advice I was given in the early stages of my recovery from sexual abuse. The advice I got was to retell my story in all the minute detail to anyone who would listen, with the understanding that validation cures trauma. However, with...

In this episode, I am tackling the belief that “good” Christians have to forgive because God tells us to love our enemies. But is loving the same as forgiving?  So many Christians who are still in the process of working through forgiveness get trapped in unhealthy relationships because they feel guilty about not loving their enemies as Jesus exhorts us to do in Matthew 5: 43-45. Victims are often...

Today’s episode is about how we learn to forgive, what we can do to unlearn some bad forgiveness habits, and how to make a sincere apology. We are social beings and human brains develop in community. From a very young age, we observe how adults in our homes behave toward one another. We copy their behavior, but we are also directly impacted when we are instructed to do as they say. How we learn to...

In today’s episode, I discuss how Internal Family Systems Therapy is one way to uncover the parts of ourselves that carry blame and shame in our unforgiveness of self. Forgiving ourselves is in line with the second commandment, to love our neighbor as ourselves. Loving ourselves as God loves us requires fully accepting who He created us to be. We cannot extend to others what we cannot do for ourse...

Today’s episode, What Forgiveness Is Not, is the fourth in a four-part series called Understanding Forgiveness. In today’s episode, I discuss what forgiveness is not. Forgiveness is not a one-time event we have to do it over and over and over sometimes for years before we can actually say that we have forgiven the person. Forgiveness not for the offender, it is for you, to set your heart free from...

Today’s episode is the third in a four-part series called Understanding Forgiveness. In today’s episode, I discuss seven more distinct characteristics of forgiveness. Forgiveness requires supernatural love – what we call agape love. This is the type of love with which God loves us and is made available to us through participation in the Sacraments. Forgiveness frees us to love more abundantly. For...

Today’s episode is the second in a four-part series called Understanding Forgiveness. In today’s episode, I discuss four more characteristics of forgiveness. Forgiveness is our own responsibility. If we wait for the offender to ask for forgiveness first, we may never have an opportunity to forgive. Waiting for the offender to show remorse is surrendering our power and agency to the offender.  Forg...

Today’s episode What Forgiveness Is, Part 1 is the first in a four-part series called Understanding Forgiveness. In today’s episode, I discuss four distinct characteristics of forgiveness. Forgiveness is an act of the will. We decide if, when, and how we will forgive. Jesus never forces us to forgive. He equips us with the ability to forgive through the free gift of grace to fill our hearts with f...

Hello Forgiver, In this very first episode of the Forgiveness is For You Podcast, I explain why I believe that forgiveness is the ultimate path to healing from any kind of trauma. I include a brief history of my background as a South African immigrant and my own healing through forgiveness from various traumas. I hope that my story will inspire you to explore the role that forgiveness can play on...