Football Ramble

Marcus and Jim had barely fired up the telly before Antoine Semenyo’s cracking opener gave Bournemouth an early lead. And… that was it. There was still plenty to get stuck into though, with the Sky Sports microphones picking up plenty of fruity language from a few Fulham fans nearby and the officials making a truly baffling substitution error that forced Ryan Sessegnon off. We also assess the pros...

Somewhere in Wolverhampton, Vitor Pereira is down at the Dog and Duck listening to Slipknot with a lovely pint of bitter on a coffin in front of him. A man after our own heart. Marcus, Luke, Pete and Vish pick through another devastating weekend for Manchester United and Spurs. Will Ruben Amorim put another fence between him and his Man United players for training? Plus, Javier Tebas is hunting fo...

Désiré Doué and Khvicha Kvaratskhelia reminded us on Wednesday what a proper winger should really play like, but why do we seem to be seeing less of them? Marcus, Jim & Andy discuss that on this week's Mailbag. Plus, who makes our Mount Rushmore of football s***house legends? Join us for our answers to your questions! We’re going on tour! Get your tickets now:  https://footballramblelive....

Man United vs Lyon wasn’t exactly high quality. So much so that Marcus, Andy and Jim wonder whether both sides can go out. At least Nemanja Matić put in a performance in the press conference that even José Mourinho would be proud of. Elsewhere, we explain why Mo Salah’s contract extension is great news for both Liverpool and Salah. Plus, it’s a strange day for Marcus as he finds himself agreeing w...

We hope you enjoyed the latest TNT Sports podcast. Darren Fletcher, Rio Ferdinand and Ally McCoist used up every word in the book... Lucky for you, Pete and Vish are here to add to the word vomit. They dish out praise for PSG’s strangely likeable team and ask: should Ange Postecoglou be England’s collective dad? We’re going on tour! Get your tickets now:  https://footballramblelive.com . Find...

What a night for Arsenal! This morning, we found a wild Jim Campbell walking the streets of North London and Marcus, Luke and Pete brought him in for a celebratory Ramble. On the show, Luke’s momentarily lost for words over Declan Rice’s free-kicks - It obviously doesn’t last very long. Plus, Marcus compares Unai Emery to Brendan Rodgers and Pete compares Thomas Muller to his old boiler… We’re goi...

Just when you thought Southampton were bad, Leicester City set a new football league record after failing to score in their eighth consecutive defeat. Marcus and Jim are here to try and work out what Leicester do next. Elsewhere, Harvey Barnes shows everyone how to celebrate against your old club and Liam Delap has been linked with a move to Man United. Poor bloke… We’re going on tour! Get your ti...

Fulham beat Liverpool! Luke and Jim are here to steady Marcus’ aunt by reminding him they’ll probably lose to Bournemouth next week. Oh, the cruel mistress that is the Premier League mid-table. Elsewhere, “El Flapico” lived up to its billing as Crystal Palace and Brighton showed those Manchester slugs what a real derby should look like. Plus, José Mourinho has a reason to climb back into the laund...

Young Jacky Grealish finally ended his Premier League goal-drought which extended all the way back to 2023! So with a summer exit from the Etihad looking likely, could a new club be the key to getting him back to his best? Marcus, Luke & Jim discuss that, plus why is it that Real Madrid and Barcelona can still pull the Premier League's brightest talents away from England? We’re going on tour!...

The Spurs fans booed Ange Postecoglou’s subs against Chelsea last night... But don’t worry, Ange was only encouraging the fans when, in their direction, he cupped his hands to his ears. Today, Marcus, Luke and Jim are here to gear up for a derby-filled weekend - would someone please think of a better name for the M23 Derby - Also, José Mourinho's Fenerbahçe have released a statement about Okan Bur...

Marcus and Jim only have one question after the Merseyside derby: how was James Tarkowski not sent off? The lads discuss that - and even more confusingly - try to understand the Premier League’s statement explaining the decision. Elsewhere, Jose Mourinho’s Turkish reign of terror has descended into new levels of chaos. Listen to find out more… We’re going on tour! Get your tickets now:  https...

Vish has had enough! Today, he tells Marcus and Andy that Man United should just fold the club after they lost to Nottingham Forest last night. Elsewhere, beautiful Bukayo Saka returned for Arsenal and Andy explains why the Gunners could really hurt Real Madrid in the Champions League next week, defensive injuries aside. Plus, Marcus starts a campaign against Tofu… We’re going on tour! Get your ti...

The Premier League is back! And what better way to get kick off the season’s Business End™ than with a Campbell-Speller derby! But Arsenal have a trick up their sleeve… a stadium full of smooching Gooners! What? Marcus, Luke & Jim discuss that, plus Fizzer has a pop at a man in a hat. We’re going on tour! Get your tickets now:  https://footballramblelive.com . Find us on  Bluesky ,&n...

The FA Cup quarter-finals are done and dusted. Marcus, Luke and Jim are here to pick the bones out of it all. Firstly, and most importantly, Jean-Philippe Mateta didn’t turn up with a bionic ear but he did take inspiration from Luke Moore and grow a moustache. Elsewhere, we were treated to Wayne Rooney on our telly once again and the whole of Newcastle - literally - came out to celebrate their Car...

Farewell international football, welcome back domestic football. We've not even kicked a ball yet and you lot are already asking about sackings! But with a couple of managers under pressure, is it a surprise that none of them got the boot in the international break? Marcus, Luke & Vish are here to debate just that! Plus, what's the best interview meltdown in football history? We’re going on to...

It’s time for the FA Cup quarter-finals! Jean-Philippe Mateta has returned just in time, and Marcus, Luke and Vish are wondering if he’s got a new superpower to use to his advantage. Elsewhere, Cristiano Ronaldo has entered the virtual world and Gary Caldwell blames his Scottish accent for him getting sent off last week. Yeah, it was the accent Gary... We’re going on tour! Get your tickets now:&nb...

Today, we're bringing you a special teaser of what you can expect every week on the Football Ramble Patreon. For just £4.50 a month, you'll get an extended version of every Wednesday episode of the Ramble! It's called Ramble Uncut and it's full of all the stuff we would be talking about if football wasn't always getting in the way. You’ll also hear from fellow Patreon subscribers on the Discord, g...

Marcus is off and we’ve called in substitute teacher Donaldson to teach Luke and Jim a thing or two on today’s Ramble. Naturally, that means we discuss Millwall’s new 5G network, Carlisle United's team bus moonlighting and Dean Huijsen being asked whether he smokes. Oh, and we read out various Liverpool fan reactions to the news that Trent Alexander-Arnold is off to Real Madrid. We’re going on tou...

Thomas Tuchel’s first international break as England manager is over. He’s given us two “professional” wins against inferior opposition and some chat about maybe playing 4-4-2. Have we fully indoctrinated him into the English way already? Marcus and Jim resist starting a chorus of Vindaloo, however, they do mull over that and try to work out what we’ve learned about Tuchel’s England so far. ...

What a weekend of international football! Marcus’ aunt has never been so giddy. In fact, he's so excited that today he explains to Jim, Pete and Andy why Phil Foden is England’s Tom Cairney. Once we’ve taken the time to enjoy Myles Lewis-Skelly and Dan Burn’s performances for England on Friday night, Pete tries his absolute best to cheer up any disappointed Scotland fans. Plus, Steve Bruce is back...

Thomas Tuchel had a dig at Gareth Southgate, claiming England played with no identity last summer, more focused on avoiding elimination than chasing glory. Ouch. But is it even possible to play "exciting" football at international level? Marcus, Jim & Pete debate that on this week's Mailbag. Plus, does Jim Ratcliffe have a point when he talks about prioritising Manchester United's "faithful" s...

Today, a new era begins. Marcus, Jim and Pete usher in the start of the Thomas Tuchel regime. COME ON ENGLAND! *swallows mic* Elsewhere, the Scots do a job in Greece and prove that there's only one Elgin, while Pete observes that Brian Kerr needs a hammock on Irish telly and Thierry Henry gets mobbed by Panama players on American telly. Plus, Jim witnesses another Arsenal injury and Alexis Mac All...

Get the bunting out and lay on the sandwiches: a new era of English football begins tomorrow. With Tommy Tuchs about to make his debut in the Wembley dugout, Marcus and Luke are here to answer some seismic listener questions! Who will feature in his first starting XI? Is winning all that matters, or does the football need to be exciting too? And should Tuchel wear a three lions-branded bowler hat...

The international break is here and Marcus has worn his very best lilac t-shirt to celebrate the occasion. My giddy aunt, what a time to be alive. Today, he, Luke, Vish and Andy share their first impressions of Thomas Tuchel as England manager. We also celebrate Big Dan Burn being awarded the Freedom of Northumberland, give our support to Gennaro Gattuso after his recent argument on live TV and pa...

Nuno and his boys have got themselves into a position they only could have dreamed of at the start of the season, but now they've come so far would it be a disappointment if they fell short of the Champions League places? Marcus, Luke, Jim & Vish debate that—plus, who would win in a match between a team of Mikel Artetas and a team of Pep Guardiolas? We’re going on tour! Get your tickets now:&n...