Flusterclux With Lynn Lyons: For Parents Who Worry

Parents consistently ask Lynn for the language to use with their children and teens when the family is moving away from avoidance and accommodation. In this episode, Lynn provides a list of four key phrases and conversation starters that help navigate a shift into action. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids,...

Manners and social skills are important for some basic reasons: we want our children to learn how to move through the world with decency and respect. But in this episode, Robin and Lynn go deeper, talking about manners and etiquette as a potential bridge to kindness and connection. Oh, and there’s some crying. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here...

Mary is looking for help with her 13year old daughter Reese who was Diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety in third grade. Successes are many, but after years of individual therapy, Mary wonders what tools Reese is learning. Mary wants this middle schooler to sleep in her own bed, something she hasn’t done for years. Dad is relegated to the couch. Both parents need a plan and some solid coaching. They kn...

Struggle is a vital part of learning, growing and mastery. As the new school year begins, Lynn and Ed discuss the movement from awkward and uncomfortable beginnings toward mastery, a process that is repeated throughout life. How can parents tolerate, support and even foster struggle as a key skill? WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our firs...

Is your child heading off to college this fall? If it’s their first year, then the roommate uncertainty may be dominating your household. Sparked by a compelling listener question, we tackle the perks and the problems of roommates and what you can (and can’t) do to help.  Here is the past episode that Lynn & Robin reference regarding preparing your children for college: https://www.flusterclux.com...

Here comes school…which means it’s time for reminders and a chance for a reset. From morning routines to screens, from the language of uncertainty to using less language in general, we cover it all. So, go for a walk with Lynn and Robin and hear how to actively move into fall! WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious...

In this In Session episode, Lynn talks with Sarah about her 11-year-old daughter who has become increasingly insistent about her bedtime ritual of ruminating and catastrophizing. Sarah gets pulled in, trying to “talk through” her daughter’s worries and doubts, but it’s only getting worse. What does Sarah need to do to break out of this pattern? WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND...

Parents are encouraged to provide “consistency” with their anxious children. But the type of consistency that’s often prescribed is the opposite of what Lynn teaches families. In this episode, Lynn goes after the “consistency trap” and explains the important difference between working to give your child certainty & predictability vs. consistently helping your child move to develop key anxiety-mana...

Sam and Vincent are struggling with the rigidity and bossiness of their six-year-old daughter, Jody. They’ve made great strides with her separation anxiety, but during playdates (and many other times, as well) Jody needs things to go her way. Mom’s discomfort with Jody’s distress and Dad’s similar temperament are targets we need to address! WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RES...

What happens when children are the absolute focus of a family? Marriages suffer, says Michele Weiner-Davis, a renowned relationship expert who pulls couples back from the brink. We asked Michele to bust some couples myths and set us straight. Boy, she knows her stuff.    Books by Michelle Weiner-Davis: Divorce Busting, The Divorce Remedy, Healing from Infidelity, The Sex-Starved Marriage, The Sex-...

Do your kids bicker? Teaching kids how to manage conflict both with friends and siblings is important…and exhausting! In this episode, Lynn describes how to determine when to step in and when to let them problem solve. Here are the two past episodes that Lynn references in today's show: https://www.flusterclux.com/how-to-find-a-good-child-therapist-for-your-kids-anxiety/ https://www.flusterclux.co...

Pediatricians and family physicians are on the front lines of our children’s mental health needs. In fact, they are reporting more and more that it’s the most common (and often most challenging) issue they are addressing with families. On this episode, Lynn and Robin are joined by Dr. Jessica Hochman, whose practice and podcast (Ask Dr. Jessica) focus on helping families feel more confident and in...

Emetophobia is the fear of vomiting. It’s powerful and can take over a family in dramatic fashion. In this episode, Lynn talks throwing up: how families accommodate, how it can be viewed through an OCD lens, what parents can do to help, and how to get the right help. Here is the past episode which Lynn mentions regarding picky eaters: https://www.flusterclux.com/picky-eater-kids-preventing-and-man...

This episode tackles the question we hear most often from our new listeners: how do I support my anxious child? Lynn lays out the three keys for parents: information about how anxiety works, owning family patterns, and moving away from the belief that your child’s worries are unique and what must be addressed. There’s a lot parents can do to help; here’s a roadmap.  Referenced resources from today...

Being a new parent brings up every emotion…including anxiety. Does it show up differently in moms and dads? (Yes.) Are there ways to make it less powerful? (Yes.) Are all those parenting apps helping? (Lynn has thoughts.) Whether you’re a new parent or hoping to support those in your life, there’s information here for you. Here is the link to her September webinar that Lynn discusses in this episo...

As we dive into summer, Lynn zips through three recent research findings that are great reminders about prevention, exercise, labels and warmth. (And not summer warmth. A different kind.) Here is the link to Michael Yapko's talk, How to Recover from Depression: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TVgQ_tgWMyU WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is ou...

We talk with the hosts of the This is So Awkward podacst about how communication shifts with kids as they become tweens and teens. We tackle all things pubescent with Vanessa Kroll Bennett and Dr. Cara Natterson. Puberty is starting earlier and our conversations about bodies and hormones and moods and relationships should, too. We have questions and these two smart women have answers! WE'VE MADE P...

Lynn often says that the hardest people to work with in her practice are the ones that don’t own their own stuff. In this recast of a popular Season 6 episode, we talk about owning patterns in your marriage. Both Robin and Lynn work with their husbands and both are consistently working on owning and breaking patterns. Do you get defensive? Of course you do! We’ll get specific in this episode.  WE'...

Unfortunately, childhood anxiety often leads to depression. But not always! Certain patterns increase the likelihood and make the path smoother. Knowing these patterns and risk factors—and how to interrupt them—is how we best help our families. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest start...

A listener has concerns about her daughter’s bedtime ritual. Once simply seen as cute, the words needing to be spoken in a certain way each evening are causing some concern. Is this a problem? Or a harmless, sweet routine? Also, Lynn also addresses a little known fact but common occurrence: anxious kids are very inaccurate reporters and their catastrophic language can get parents going. WE'VE MADE...

A little known fact about Lynn: she uses pediatric hypnosis and even wrote a clinical text on the subject. The term hypnosis carries a lot of baggage, so we’re going to set the record straight. Lynn talks about how she uses it, its validity in pediatric medical settings and the myths we need to bust. And here are the hypnosis organizations that Lynn references in this episode: nphti.org & asch.net...

In this episode, a mother is struggling with her daughter’s demand for certainty. At 17, she’s convinced she has cancer, won’t attend therapy, and is holding the family hostage. What can a parent do when a teen is refusing help? WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here For those brand new to the podca...

After decades of seeing families, Lynn quickly spots the obstacles that undermine or even derail therapy. From inconsistency to too many cooks in the therapy kitchen, Lynn runs through her list. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this...

Of course we want to get rid of worry, our own and our kids’, but trying to eliminate the thoughts and feelings and sensations of anxiety is a trap. Nonetheless, the use of what Lynn calls “elimination strategies” continues. What does Lynn mean…and what do we do instead? WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids,...

As we reflect on the fifth anniversary of COVID this month, Lynn and Ed discuss its impact on kids’ social interactions. Have adults stopped modeling and teaching social norms? Are we allowing our children to avoid social, in-person experiences and then calling it anxiety? Do we need to do better? WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first...