First Name Basis Podcast

But really, can we? I know y'all are seeing it too. You've shared with me that once you know what to look for you've started to see it all over the place. Okay so now you know it's there but what do you do about it?  In this episode we break down three super cringey examples of white privilege that I've seen in the last week. Tune in to hear how those of you who hold white privilege can respond in...

We need to stop celebrating Columbus Day — immediately.   The story that we learned about Christopher Columbus could not be further from the truth. He was a colonizer, enslaver, and sex trafficker who committed genocide against Indigenous Peoples. Don't believe me? Listen in and decide for yourself.   By celebrating Columbus Day, our country has erased the history of Native Americans, and now is t...

Books are such a powerful teaching tool because they give us glimpses into experiences beyond our own — which is something children's book author Andrea Wang is an expert at. Andrea's books are beautiful for many reasons — they'll make you laugh, they'll make you cry, and they'll help you better understand Chinese and other Asian cultures. I can't recommend her picture books and middle grade novel...

Can you believe that Halloween is just around the corner? I know some of you super-prepared parents out there are already getting costumes put together for your kiddos, and you may be wondering about cultural appropriation as you're looking through the shelves and online at all the costume options. I get asked all the time about how to avoid cultural appropriation with Halloween costumes, and it's...

Your kiddo just said something racist.  Trust me, as a parent myself, I can feel your pain, hear your groans of embarrassment and sense your anxiety.  But what do you do now? If you are here listening to this podcast and participating in this community, I know you are working toward creating an anti-racist and inclusive world for your kids. But guess what? Despite our very best efforts, sometimes...

Debunking the myth that Black Lives Matter is trying to destroy families is such an important topic, we're spending our second week in a row talking about it. If you haven't had a chance to listen to last week's episode — " Black Lives Matter And the Family Part 1: Enslavement "  — I would encourage you to check out that one first.  In Part 1, we talk about what Black Lives Matter has actually sai...

The summer of 2020 was difficult and emotionally taxing for So. Many. Reasons. But one of the hardest things for me was hearing white parents say that they could not support Black Lives Matter because they believed that Black Lives Matter wanted to destroy families, which simply is not true. Where does this myth come from? Why would anyone think Black Lives Matter doesn't support families? It pret...

Microaggression may have "micro" in its name, but that doesn't mean these assaults are small. Two women I admire so much for their anti-racism work explain it like this: "There's nothing micro about micro aggressions" — Britt Hawthorne , anti-racist educator  "Microaggression, macro effect." — Alex Scott , creator of Ditto Kids Magazine  According to a paper by researchers at the Teachers College...

It's basically impossible to open your news app without seeing a headline about Critical Race Theory, but what is it? Could you explain it to a friend if they asked you for guidance? Could you give examples of how the laws in our country affect different groups of people based on the color of their skin? This episode will give you the tools and confidence you need to have these crucial conversatio...

In this episode I walk you through the anti-bias approach that I took when my daughter came up against something in one of her library books that didn't align with our family values. Listen in for a concrete example of what it looks like to talk to your children about bias.    Patreon Learning Community    Join the First Name Basis Patreon Community Make sure to join our Patreon Community to take...

We want our children to embrace anti-racist education both at school and at home, but what does that actually look like? In this episode I interview Alexandria Scott, Founder and Editor-in-Chief of Ditto Kids Magazine, an anti-racist magazine for kiddos. Alex and I chat about everyday anti-racism and how us parents can incorporate anti-racism into our interactions with our children. We also spend...

Juneteenth is the oldest celebration of the abolition of slavery here in the United States. Every year on June 19th families come together to celebrate the resilience of our ancestors who survived and persevered during one of the darkest times of our nation's history. We take time to reflect on where we are as a family, a community, and a nation and how we can work together to better live out our...

54 years ago today Richard and Mildred Loving won their landmark Civil Rights case against the state of Virginia. Because of the Lovings states were no longer permitted to create racist laws that would prevent couples from marrying one another because of the color of their skin. Unfortunately, this right was not extended to ALL couples until 2015 when the Supreme Court ruled in favor of LGBTQ+ cou...

Richard and Mildred Loving never expected to be Civil Rights icons, they simply wanted to love one another and grow their beautiful family. Listen in to hear how the Lovings took their interracial love story to the Supreme Court and abolished racist marriage laws across the country. Be sure to download the free Loving coloring page that goes along with the episode at firstnamebasis.org/lovingdayco...

Today, Tuesday, May 25th marks one year since George Floyd was brutally murdered by the police in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Here are 3 things you can do to show solidarity for the Black Lives Matter movement and remember George Floyd and others who have been murdered by the police.  Listen to " Ahmaud Arbery and George Floyd: Unpacking Racism "  (Season 2, Episode 17) Take some time today to have a...

I think we can all agree that gaslighting is the wooooorst. When you share a vulnerable or tough experience with someone and they respond in a way that makes you feel like you're being dramatic and overreacting it really hurts. In this episode I cover the many ways that people gaslight one another, where the term comes from, why people engage in gaslighting, how to respond when someone is gaslight...

One of the most common questions you asked during the last election was, "how do I teach my children media literacy," and I found the perfect person to be our guiding light. After 27 years as an Emmy award winning journalist, Tori Nelson founded KidNuz. KidNuz "delivers current events in a kid-friendly package, sparks curiosity, and gets them asking critical questions." Tori shares her expertise a...

Current events are always tough, and it seems like they've been especially brutal and heart-breaking lately. Here are 5 tips for talking to children about the hard things going on around them and what they hear on the news.  If you can, prepare for the conversation with another adult  Start by asking open-ended questions Tell the truth, age appropriately  Center the conversation around your values...

Are you fed up with voter suppression? Me too. This episode not only breaks down what's going on with voter suppression but also gives action steps for what we need to DO about it.  Listen to hear:  What's going on with voter suppression in Georgia (and other states)  A mini untold story of the history of voter suppression in the United States  How we are going to work together to help stop voter...

Things have felt heavy lately and I thought we all might need a little hope. This is the audio from an IG live that I shared last week. Take some time to reflect on what it means to be an abolitionist and what that looks like in your life. Love y'all so much! "Don't get lost in a sea of despair. Be hopeful, be optimistic. Our struggle is not the struggle of a day, a week, a month or a year, it is...

You asked, she answered! Last time I had my mom, Dr. Leslie Telfer, on the podcast you had SO MANY great questions for her! After she shared about her 30 year career as a psychologist who specialized in PTSD you wanted to know more. I asked her all of your burning questions about the parenting style her and my dad used, the way that she was able to balance her profession and her family, and strate...

In this episode I interview Ashley Aikele and Elyse Beard, the founders of Bravery Magazine . Bravery Magazine is my favorite tool for teaching women's history, each issue introduces real role models and aims to empower kids to "be their own kind of brave." We dig into the origin story of Bravery Magazine, the importance of intersectionality, and the myth that feminism hurts men and boys. One of t...

Women are tasked with navigating male-dominated spaces each and every day. As an electrical engineer my sister, Nina Clarke-Telfer, knows how frustrating it can be to fight for the respect she deserves and be taken seriously. Not only is she a woman in an industry where women comprise only 13% of the workforce, she is a mixed Woman of Color. She has had to learn what it takes to carve out a place...

We're all familiar with the stereotype that Black people love fried chicken. It has been used to degrade, dehumanize, and uphold racism. But where does this stereotype come from? And why was fried chicken singled out?  In this episode, we explore the answers to both of these questions and show the role that fried chicken has played in perpetuating white supremacy. Plus, my dad makes an appearance...

Since the start of the pandemic the Asian-American community has faced heightened discrimination, racism, and violence. In this episode I give concrete examples of what it looks like to stand up against this racism and how we can model these anti-racist actions for our children. We then transition into my conversation with children's author Andrea Wang to learn how we can bring Chinese culture int...