Faith Always First Podcast

This episode of Faith AF is for those silently grieving an apology that may never come. It explores the emotional toll of unacknowledged trauma, the desire for justice that often masquerades as anger, and the liberating truth that healing is not dependent on repentance from the one who caused the pain. Listeners will hear a raw account of survival, release, and spiritual reclamation. It’s a call t...

At my heaviest, I was nearing 250 pounds—and no one said anything. But even if they had, it wouldn’t have changed a thing. Because what I needed to lose wasn’t just weight… It was shame. It was perfectionism. It was every lie that told me I had to earn love to deserve it. This episode of Faith AF is one of the most personal stories I’ve ever told. It’s not a before-and-after glow-up—it’s a healing...

Sometimes your mind moves on—but your body never left the scene. This episode of Faith AF is for the ones who’ve forgiven—but still flinch. The ones who prayed it away, journaled it out, and “moved on”—but whose chest still tightens, breath shortens, and body still braces for a threat that isn’t there. Because trauma doesn’t just live in memory. It lives in muscle. It lingers in the nervous system...

What happens when being a man becomes the very thing keeping you from healing? This episode of Faith AF gets honest about the emotional malnourishment so many boys grow up with—and the unspoken grief of masculinity that demands strength but never allows softness. From the silent weight of “man up” to the church’s complicity in emotional detachment, we’re naming what’s rarely said out loud: masculi...

What do you do when the man who gave you life also gave you your first wound? In this episode of Faith AF, Sashauni Aaeliyae shares a raw, unfiltered reflection on the deep ache of father wounds—and how they shape the way we see men, trust God, and define love. From settling for affection that looked like attention, to searching for God in broken relationships, she unpacks the silent grief of grow...

They hurt me. But I refused to become them. This episode is for anyone who’s ever had to unlearn the armor they picked up in survival. When softness feels unsafe, control feels like protection, and power feels like the only antidote to pain—how do you heal without hardening? We’re talking about what it means to walk away from the wounds that shaped you without letting them define you. Not to be th...

What happens when love wasn’t absent… just insufficient? This episode of Faith AF is for the ones who were told, “They did their best”—but still felt the sting of what was missing. For the ones learning how to hold grief and grace in the same breath. For the ones trying to forgive people who didn’t abandon them—but still left them aching. We’re unpacking what it means to release resentment without...

Are you falling for someone… or just falling into a cycle? This episode of Faith AF is for the ones who prayed for a sign—and now don’t know if it’s confirmation or confusion. For the ones who can’t tell if the connection is divine or just familiar. And for the ones who’ve mistaken chemistry for clarity, or soul ties for purpose. We’re getting honest about lust that hides as longing, patterns that...

Season 2 is here—and we’re not just getting summer ready, we’re getting soul ready. In this episode, we’re reclaiming the fullness of who God made us to be: mind, body, and spirit. Because somewhere along the way, many of us were taught that our minds were too much, our bodies were too messy, and our spirits were the only part worth bringing to God. But He didn’t create us in fragments. He created...

In the Faith Always First Season 1 finale, we closes out the season with a vulnerable, honest, and necessary conversation: Why does religion—something meant to unite us in love—so often become the very thing that divides us? From family fallout to political polarization, doctrinal disagreements to denominational splits, Sashauni explores how faith has been both a lifeline and a weapon. She unpacks...

Is homosexuality a sin? It’s a question that has divided churches, shaped cultural narratives, and left many LGBTQ individuals feeling like they must choose between their faith and their identity. But are we interpreting scripture correctly, or have cultural biases shaped our understanding? In this continuation of our last episode, we’re is diving deeper into the scriptures most often cited in thi...

For centuries, the church has shaped how we think about sex, desire, and morality—but has it done so through wisdom and grace, or fear and shame? And nowhere is this more evident than in the way Christianity has historically treated the LGBTQ+ community. In this episode of Faith AF, we’re unpacking the deep, often painful relationship between faith, sexuality, and identity. Why has the church elev...

In today’s world, women’s sexuality is more openly embraced than ever—but is this progress, or are we reacting to deeper wounds? More women are approaching sex without attachment, mirroring how men have traditionally been expected to engage with it. But is this truly empowerment, or are we shielding ourselves from hurt? In this episode of Faith AF, we’re diving into the shifting dynamics of sex, l...

For generations, religion has dictated the terms of sexuality—especially for women. Be pure. Stay untouched. Silence your desires. But what happens when those teachings leave us unprepared for intimacy? What happens when shame overshadows pleasure? In this episode of Faith AF, I’m breaking the silence. From growing up in purity culture to navigating marriage, divorce, and my own ‘vagina awakening,...

Let’s talk about it—the battle between our God-given desires and our commitment to holiness. Is masturbation actually a sin, or have we been misinterpreting scripture? If desire is designed for marriage, why do we experience it so strongly in our single season? In this episode of Faith AF, I’m breaking down biblical perspectives on self-pleasure, sharing my personal struggle with intense hormonal...

In this deeply personal episode of Faith AF, Sashauni Aaeliyae talks about her lifelong battle with depression and the journey of reconciling faith and mental health. Growing up in a church culture that dismissed mental illness, Sashauni faced isolation, stigma, and the weight of being a “functioning depressive.” Through raw and unfiltered reflections, she opens up about hitting rock bottom, disco...

In this bold and unfiltered episode of Faith AF, we’re diving deep into a troubling trend taking over social media- the rise of male influencers weaponizing vulnerability to manipulate women. These men appear emotionally open, sharing “heartfelt” stories and declaring their search for a wife, but beneath the surface, they lack emotional intelligence, accountability, and stability- both financially...

In this episode of Faith AF, host Sashauni Aaeliyae shares a candid and heartfelt look into the fears and doubts she faced while stepping into her purpose. From second-guessing her voice to battling insecurities about her worth, Sashauni unpacks the raw and vulnerable journey of starting this podcast. This episode is an inspiring reminder that purpose isn’t about perfection—it’s about showing up,...

In this episode of Faith AF, we dive into the hot-button issue of bans dominating headlines. From Pornhub restrictions in certain states to the looming threat of TikTok and CapCut bans, we unpack what these decisions are really about. Are these bans designed to protect us, or are they a tool for control? While banning porn sites may address harmful issues like the desensitization of sex, misogyny,...