Expansive Intimacy with Jim Young

“Put your hands around grief almost as if it’s your best friend, because at times it will be,” says Ken Mossman, host of the “Mojo for the Modern Man” podcast who also runs several intensive “I AM” (Integrated Adult Male) groups throughout the year. Grieving, he says, is different for every person and the experience is different for every person we grieve, but it is part of the experience of love....

“I’m a work in progress,” says Mike Sweeney, Chief Strategy Officer at RallyBright, where he helps clients build inclusive, resilient and high performing teams. A dad to three teenage girls, Mike’s interpretation of intimacy has evolved to include what he calls “noticing and nudging” someone when they say they’re fine. He shares the many types of support his brother showed him throughout his divor...

“Those types of protective responses destroy our connection and the ability to have intimacy, ” says Matt Bush, owner of Next Level Neuro, a neuroscience based health and performance coaching company. Matt picks up where Elisabeth Kristof left off to discuss the way our nervous system forms patterns in response to Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE). ACE are anything that disrupt a child’s environ...

“Trauma is not the past event, it lives in the present,” says Elisabeth Kristof, certified applied neurology and somatics practitioner and founder of Brain Based Wellness, an online platform designed to help people’s nervous systems and bodies resolve old patterns and improve their performance, using the concept of neurosomatic intelligence. Trauma, usually that experienced in early childhood, aff...

“A guy who’s maybe lost a little hair on top, driving around in a little red sports car,” this is the classic image most of us conjure when we hear of a man having a midlife crisis.   Yet, on this solo “Jimtimacy” episode of the Expansive Intimacy podcast, your host Jim Young tells the story that he and so many men, have and continue to suffer from the type of midlife crisis that looks nothing lik...

“As an engineer, I saw emotions as data which is the wrong thing to say when someone is crying,” jokes Drew Tarvin, CEO of Humor That Works, author of “The Skill of Humor Playbook” and master of puns. Initially better with computers than people, Drew learned to be funny–and more emotionally intelligent–by studying improv. Now, he introduces the practice of humor into such major–and seemingly serio...

“I can see all the harm that I did by leaning into my power without acknowledging it,” says Ken Hamilton, who joins the Expansive Intimacy podcast to discuss his own journey through intimacy. It includes abolishing what he calls the “middle aged white man” belief that he is the center of everything, while at the same time acknowledging the way he affects people around him. He compares the differen...

Jealousy is just like all other emotions. It has something to tell us. (6:30-6:34 | Joli Hamilton)    Get ready for an eye-opening episode as Jim engages in a thought-provoking discussion with Dr. Joli Hamilton, a relationship coach who specializes in guiding couples that color outside the lines. In this episode, they delve deep into the profound impact of power dynamics and jealousy on intimate r...

“A lot of what expansive intimacy is about is this reciprocal type of relationship that we build at a really deep level with other people so that our needs and other people's needs get met.” In this episode, Jim takes a deep dive into the concept SASS, which was first introduced in episode 04 with guest Cait Donovan.   Cait described the acronym SASS ("super autonomous self-sufficiency") as a comm...

“Now that you know what you know, what do you think of me?”       Nico Boesten asked his late father that question in a dream. It's a question that might lay at the center of intimacy itself. His father was an important modeler of vulnerability in Nico’s life and early on he showed Nico how to create a safe space for intimate exchanges.   Too many men, Nico and Jim agree “should on themselves,” or...

“Men love talking about falling in love, the birth of their babies, when they’re scared or overwhelmed, or what’s hard in their life, but they’re never given the opportunity to do so.” - Kate Mangino       For her book Equal Partners: Improving Gender Equality at Home, Kate Mangino interviewed scores of men about how to bring more gender equality into their partnerships. One of the biggest takeawa...

“It’s a lot better on the other side.”  So says Dxtr Spits, a spoken word artist, jack of all trades, and founder of “ How Men Cry ” as he talks about learning to open up and be more vulnerable.   Like Jim, Dxtr was conditioned at a young age by those around him to suppress his sensitive nature. Through writing, performing, and therapy Dxtr continues to reach a more authentic self, and through an...

“Being ostracized is our biggest fear,” says Cait Donovan, keynote speaker and host of Fried! The Burnout podcast.       In this episode, Jim is joined by Cait Donovan, a leading expert on individual and organizational burnout. Cait uses a rich combination of research and deep life experience to explain the myriad sources of stress that contribute to burnout.   This “web of causation,” as Cait ref...

Our ability to think creatively and collaboratively and productively and stay in flow is directly tied to our sense of safety and our sense of trust and our sense of alignment. And right in the heart of that is intimacy. - Dan Doty This week's guest is Dan Doty, men’s work leader and founder of Evryman, a company which teaches emotional vulnerability to men.   From an early age growing up in small...

“I’m on a mission to shift our culture,” says Newton Cheng, Director of Health and Performance at Google and the first guest on the Expansive Intimacy podcast. Newton’s experience with intimacy began in his late teens when he would observe the friction that arose from each new experience to determine if he was doing what was best for himself.  In leadership, he finds that vulnerability, which ofte...

“This podcast is designed to provide a space where men can start to explore how to bring intimacy into their lives,” shares Host Jim Young. After experiencing immense burnout, Jim went on a quest to regain control of his life. After successfully defeating this period of hardship, he went back to evaluate his process. And amid his journey, he discovered something he never knew existed: expansive in...