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Time to catch up on the Churchie stuff and then on to the main game. Baby Ted may be over reaching. He has problems in Gascony, problems in Scotland and he wants to invade France. We need allies – Dutch, Germans, Flemish but Lucky Phil wants them too. Can the Pope help out?

Time for Baby Ted to introduce the Scots to the new king and show them that he isn’t like his Dad but very much like his Grandad Superted the mighty powerful king. We’ll also see how he is very much into fashion and spectacle. Then our Frenchies decide once again they will support the Scots – no rest for the wicked.

The young chap is in charge now and get off to a rather promising start. Slow and steady, well thought out decisions who could want anything more? Well Edward – he wants Scotland.

Junior has been sidelined and will die – maybe – horribly – maybe. Point is, Roger and Isabel are running the show. Surely they won’t fall into the trap of just taking a ton of stuff for themselves?

How has Junior survived this long? He may or may not make it through this episode. We’re off to Scotland to have another go and get a crisis in France. But our biggest problem is Cousin Hank – what a dick.

Roger is out of the slammer and is in France. Junior has to pay homage to the new Frenchie king for Gascony. He can’t go himself – if he does Hugh Despenser will be toast and he can’t take Hugh because Hugh isn’t welcome in France. What will he do? Surely he won’t send Isabel and Baby Ted – that would be stupid and Junior isn’t stupid. Forget that – he is stupid.

We have a new player to look at. Roger Mortimer – marcher lord. What a guy.

Oh Junior, what are you doing? Things are going off the rails and Robert Bruce is running around doing whatever he wants. Junior is busy with his new BFF – Hugh Despenser. Did he learn nothing from the Piers Gaveston thing? Seems not.

Time for Junior to go and sort those Scots out once and for all. He has a huge army and all he needs to do is catch the Scots and crush them. Let’s go to Bannock Burn to kill those haggis eaters.

Superted is dead – don’t panic, Junior is on the big chair. Let’s examine his early rule and now we can panic.

Make sure your breakfast is nicely settled, get some tissues for a good old boo hoo hoo and we’ll see the end of Ted and the end of our brave handsome and strong mighty Templars.

Some nonsense

Time for Superted to go and show those Scots who’s in charge. And we get a royal wedding! But as usual it’s all about cash – or lack of it for Superted.

It’s not a happy Superted this week. Welsh are revolting, Scots are revolting, he has to go to Flanders to belt up Frenchies and all he wants to do is go on crusade. Churchie guys won’t stump up any cash and just to complete our misery along comes this nobody called William Wallace.

This won’t be a happy time for Superted. His missus will die, there’s no cash in the piggy bank and there’s trouble brewing in Scotland. All our Ted wants to do is go on crusade. But. Acre will fall and that’s it for our Middle Eastern Christian types.

It's all about Wales and Llewelyn ap Gruffyd for Superted. Plus Eleanors pregnant!

It's Superted's time to shine like the star he is. After recovering from that assasination attempt he can go and rule England. Just a slight detour into France for a year or so then it's off home for magnificent parliaments, law and order and sorting out the money bin

Henry and Simon had tried the talky stuff but it hasn't worked. Perhaps we would be better off trying the hitting each other stuff and see how that goes. Useless Henry vs Hardman Simon but Henry has Superted. Spanish Eleanor will just be pregnant for the whole episode.

Surely after all this time we've learned what to do and make this a splendid success. Or not.

To be fair, it's just Henry being Henry, Simon being Simon and Superted still learning to be Super. But we do get a Parle Ment so there is that.

In which we meet a bunch of heretics - the Cathars. Don't panic Simon de Montfort snr will get into them while teaching Simon jnr how to be a very hard man. Young Simon can go on to be Henry's BFF and then start causing all sorts of trouble. On top of all that, there will be an assasination attempt on the king. Oh dear.

Our brave Crusaders will do splendidly well before getting a hands on lesson about how the Nile floods. But don't panic - Emperor Fred is on his way to show us how it's done. Plus we catch up on our fun loving Templars.

King John does us all a favour and dies. Introducing Hank 3! Will he be any good? Can't be worse than the last guy. Marshall Bill had a final glorious outing and we meet the fabulous Nicola of Lincoln. She's great!

Wicked King John has been backed into a corner by his barons. There's only one way out and that is to agree to their demands. John will now give birth to a new industry - constitutional lawyers. Thanks John.

There's a new Pope in town - he's young and keen and so we have heard the call to arms and are back off on crusade. Can we cover ourselves in glory this time? We'll get this sorted out in time to cover the Childrens Crusade. Big bunch of 12 year olds what could possibly go wrong?