EJG The Weirdo

Toilet Water Splash – This episode is all over the place, but in the best way. I kick things off with some exciting news about my podcast ranking in Canada before diving into phone storage struggles and a quick reflection on Charlie Kirk. Then we get into the real star of the show: toilets. From overzealous automatic flush sensors that leave you with a wet butt to the horrors of porta potty splash...

Why do we always say Congratulations – In this episode, I dive into why people feel obligated to congratulate others, even when they don’t actually care. From pregnancies to promotions, I question whether constant congratulations really mean anything—or if it’s just social habit. I talk about being genuine vs. fake, how tradespeople see the world differently than office workers, and why fancy truc...

First Guest: Bearded Bill  – In this episode, I sit down with my very first guest to dive into Canadian politics. We cover everything from the struggles of minority government and leadership failures to the impact of immigration on housing, crime, and public safety. Along the way, we share blunt takes on Trudeau, Pierre Poilievre, and how government decisions shape Canada’s future. Expect raw poli...

Are you Sure you’re gay? – In this episode, I rant about how people sometimes confuse finding someone attractive with actually being gay. From Ryan Reynolds to Tom Hardy, I argue that appreciating a good-looking guy doesn’t automatically change your orientation—it just means you’ve got eyes. Along the way, I veer into embarrassing confessions about peeing (and sometimes pooping) your pants, the jo...

Motivational Speech: Accomplish it – In this episode, I try something different: going full-on positive. I talk about work, purpose, money goals, and why it doesn’t matter what job you pick as long as you give it everything you’ve got. From chasing financial stability to battling through tasks you hate, I share why effort, attitude, and balance matter more than shortcuts. Life’s tough, but if you...

You’re a professional. That’s what my journeyman told me while I was wiring a panel, and it hit me harder than I expected. If this is your full-time trade, there shouldn’t be “just in case” shortcuts—you should know what you’re doing. From that wake-up call, I drift into rants about soggy Egg McMuffins, failed lightning-bolt science ideas, weird sayings like “half-assed” vs. “half-asked,” and even...

Skunkman What happens when life throws cars, skunks, and random hospital patients at you all in one story? In this episode, I break down the very important question: if you had insane hops and tried to leap over a speeding car — but got sprayed by a skunk first — could you still land it? From tomato juice baths to unfair betrayals, to the birth of the ultimate anti-hero “Skunkman,” this rant takes...

Pop It or Stop It My face still breaks out in my mid-20s and it drives me insane. Do people actually notice? (Yes. I do. And that’s the problem.) I rant about popping vs. leaving the white volcano, moms and wives who love pimple popping, and why strangers with planet-sized zits make it impossible to shop at Walmart. Then we swerve into the Great Shower Debate: peeing in the shower (aim for the dra...

Ghosts Don’t Like Me Everyone around me seems to have a ghost story—friends, family, even my wife—yet I’ve never had a single haunting. Maybe ghosts are just scared of me… or maybe I’m too boring for the afterlife. In this episode, I rant about hauntings, urns, and whether ghosts could be useful for telling us the real history that schools get wrong. Of course, I go off-track too: dying in a “cool...

Is Being Fake so Bad? In this episode, I dig into whether being “fake” is actually the worst thing in the world. If someone you don’t even like is acting super kind, offering you a glass of water or a chocolate bar—are they really the bad guy? I talk about honesty vs. politeness, when it’s okay to hold back the truth (like after someone’s family member dies), and when brutal honesty is actually th...

Gym Rats Flexing in the mirror, posting shirtless selfies, chasing Tom Hardy’s body goals, and why most of it just screams “douche” energy. In this episode, I go off on gym culture, insecurity vs. confidence, and whether anyone actually cares about your pecs on Instagram. I also wander into trades talk, why I think electricians are the superior trade, and why sweeping is still part of the job no m...

Ms Rachel Kids love her, parents tolerate her, and I… can’t stand her. In this episode I go off about Miss Rachel, kids’ songs that make zero sense, and why some children’s shows feel more like torture than teaching. Along the way, I somehow end up talking about pineapple pizza, gravy, traffic in Cochrane, Florida Man, and why dentists should’ve never gotten rid of laughing gas. It’s chaotic, it’s...

Politics: Carbon Scam Tax Today’s episode isn’t about Grey’s Anatomy or pee ducts — it’s about politics. I’m fired up about Canada’s carbon tax, government spending, and the ridiculous promises that never add up. From free money handouts to sky-high taxes, I rant about why the system feels broken, how working-class Canadians are getting crushed, and why the so-called “solutions” are making everyth...

Pee Duct What if peeing and pleasure weren’t connected? What if we all had a retractable, fruit-rollup-style belly-button pee duct that grows longer every year? In this episode, I break down my genius/idiotic invention idea, explore the unfair advantage men already have when it comes to peeing, and imagine how life would change if everyone had their own personal pee hose. Spoiler: it’s weird, it’s...

Doctor Talk Grey’s Anatomy, Derek Shepherd, unpronounceable medical words, vagina-cologists (yes, you read that right), worms, birds, dogs, tattoos, strawberries, McDonald’s discounts, Elon Musk, and why guys and girls get treated differently for being hoes. This episode has no plan, no filter, and somehow goes from doctors to butthole worms to cheesy bread without missing a beat. If you came for...