Dewey's Ditties

WHAT YOUR BEER SAYS ABOUT YOU You can work on your pickup lines till they roll right off your tongue Get a tattoo cowgirls fall for when the neon lights turn on You might even impress when you two-step in your fancy cowboy boots But do you know WHAT YOUR BEER SAYS ABOUT YOU? The label on the longneck your drinking Is worth at least a thousand words Telling all the women in the bar if you're Worth...

Two thousand years ago near the City of David A wond'rous star appeared one night It guided magi to the place Where Jesus lay in a crib of hay That little bitty manger was a KING SIZE BED For the Christ child born in Bethlehem While the angels sang The Shepherds prayed To the baby in the KING SIZE BED That lowly stable was a Holy Temple As the newborn Savior rested there The sheep and cattle even...

We didn't always toe the line and now I wonder how we'd be If Dad didn't have the heart to correct us on his knee When he wasn't pullin' double-shifts to pay the bills on time He led us all in prayer before Mom turned out the lights All his sacrifices kept our family goin' And I'm glad he handed down that devotion I'm DAD-ICATED to raising our kids With tough love and hugs in a home where God live...

She's at His house every Sunday Got His name tattooed on her arm She reads His book religiously And glued His symbol on her car If you know our Savior, then you wouldn't wonder How her affection for Him makes our marriage so much stronger She loves Jesus MORE THAN ME And I wouldn't have it any other way Her heart is mine but her soul is His eternally Yeah, she loves Jesus MORE THAN ME Her life's a...

Yesterday my boss called me off the line Knew I had a CDL years ago Said he could make me rich if I got back into trucking Hauling parts from coast to coast But before the last words of the offer left his lips I just shook my head and told him how it is I DON'T ROLL In my rock-solid home Gotta a beautiful wife and happy kids to hold I'm covered in love like moss on a sedentary stone I DON'T ROLL I...

"I wonder how this beer got to this bar?” said no one ever But if it didn't there'd be one less place for friends to gather No matter how you drink it From a bottle, can, or glass Without guys like me the neon party wouldn't last...I'm... ALCOHAULIN’ Ice cold beer to your favorite bar in town ALCOHAULIN’ In a reefer eighteen wheeler hammer down Bartenders get the thanks and tips For quenching all...

Grandma claimed it was the biggest oak for miles around And it lived by the front porch of our old farmhouse When it was too hot to fish I cooled off under its leaves That’s when Grandma brought me out a glass of her sweet tea Then almost like a Sunday prayer She'd praise the cool in the air Everybody needs a SHADE TREE A quiet haven of rest Somewhere to find peace of mind And the reasons to feel...

I flip-flopped through the hotel lobby and past the tiki bar When I reached the beach my Yeti on wheels put a helluva strain on my arm But this lounge chair with umbrella is the best place I could be Where the surf waves goodbye to what we had and I drown your memory I'm getting... SAND BLASTED By the oceanside Beer after beer stripping you off my mind It might take a week or two Until my outlook'...

His first taste of whiskey was a slow, smooth burn That set his rebel mouth on fire Gave him courage to speak his mind To the bouncers, boyfriends and liars Five broken bones and two marriages later He was crowned the town agitator…now… He's dry as a bone in an Arizona desert Gentle as a baby on a pillow full of feathers He's off rock bottom and that's a real good start But he'll always be bruised...

Grampa musta heard how I was spending my time Out with a different gal every Friday night Guess he thought I could use some good advice So one hot sunny day He lured me to the lake After two hours of anglin’ with no luck in that heat Grampa shrugged his shoulders and laid it out for me You can spend your life casting a line In the same old place, on the wrong day and time But if you wanna land a k...

I woulda never sold my truck To buy that one-way ticket out If I thought I could get over her Back there in our home town Guess I believed those songs about tequila And the healing power of pretty Senoritas...but... There's NO MAGIC IN MEXICO Like they sing about on the radio Sad feelings and emotions don't drown in the ocean And the sun doesn't bake bad memories away Hangovers are sure cheaper Th...

I watched dad reverse that pickup and trailer a hundred times before Squeeze it through the cattle gate right to that old barn door I was just fifteen when he handed me the keys to have a go And he gave me some advice I guess he thought I'd need to know If you find yourself in a bad situation Put it in park say a prayer for patience Re-evaluate which way you're goin' Get yourself straightened out,...

You woke up this morning, caught me smiling, staring at your face Truth be told I scan you head to toe every day Now you wanna know what part of you I love the best Well, they're all beautiful but one stands out from the rest I PICK YOUR NOSE Over your ears and your eyes I PICK YOUR NOSE Over the nape of your neck and thighs Even when I consider all the feminine parts hidden under your clothes Dar...

There's a special place endangered on this earth Where life lessons are first and foremost learned It's a haven of rest; always safe and secure That cherishes responsibility and God's Word And there are still a few protecting it today It's time the world stood up to give them thanks HOME MAKERS Faith-filled soul savers Moms and Dads who vow, 'Forever' Raising up their kids together There's nothing...

From one guy to another you did the right thing by callin' me Before you gave into her demand for family fun at Disneyland You gotta stop the rust building up on that Chrome ball hitch on your pickup truck With the boat and trailer you've been saving up for sailor You can give your wife and kids a three-day West Coast trip Or teach 'em all a lifelong skill like how to fish Don't CAVE MAN If you do...

She's smart And real pretty Loves Elvis and thinks I’m witty She drinks beer And eats healthy Rumor has it her daddy's wealthy In the end it was a difficult decision To choose between her heart and my transmission...but... SHE CAN’T DRIVE A STICK SHIFT and that's a deal breaker for me Don't need her grindin' down my gears every time she turns the key I never could respect her knowing she'd burn ou...

She's a local attraction and a helluva mystery Got a body built in Detroit; talks like small-town Mississippi And that red broken heart tattoo on her neck Ain't as harmless as a country boy might expect,...yeah, it's a... WARNING LABEL For all the smooth-talking guys Armed with charm and money on a Friday night They buy her one, buy her two, buy her three tequilas Think she'll fold and roll like a...

I'm a cowboy at heart but that ain't no excuse For all the times I rode roughshod over you There's no way to wrangle any harsh words I said That kept us up some nights alone in the same bed...but... If I could throw a bridle and saddle on my life Spin it around, take the trail back in time And head off each tear I sent down your face Then, darling, you know, I'd be RIDING HARD TODAY You tamed my w...

I never tried the funny cigarette they call weed But sometimes I need a way to escape reality The best way I can lift my fallen spirits up again Are with movin', down-home tunes like Cripple Creek and Uncle Pen SMOKIN' BLUEGRASS Gets me high down to my soul  SMOKING BLUEGRASS Love to hear the banjo roll Fire up the fiddle and flat top now and then Keep the rhythm movin' with the bass and mandolin...

Verse 1 I was a frat boy in AGR and chukka boots You were a smart and pretty Farmhouse Little Sister We found common ground and a whole lot more At Dan & Gracie's drinking two dollar pitchers Your momma said I'd break your heart and I did right in its track  Smack dab in the middle of affection with no looking back Chorus Forty years of me and you In sunshine and rain Hopelessly devoted  By God's...

I got off work an hour ago and drove straight to the bank With seven days of sweat and blood made out in my name But I didn't pay my bills today like I always do, Cuz I knew I'd need every dime to drink her leaving off my mind SHE BROKE MY HEART ON PAYDAY Now I got money to burn This lonesome bridge to her memory Drink after drink 'til I don't hurt Guess I should be thankful it turned out this way...

I ain't no doctor but I got Google So I can self-diagnose all my aches and pains And since you left me I'm showing signs of A rare disease affecting my chest and brain There's no tellin' how much time I've got left to go It's a cross between what killed Old Yeller and Romeo HEARTBREAK RABIES I'm foaming at the mouth with every mug of beer HEARTBREAK RABIES Mixing water with my whiskey is my bigges...

How'd you know I'd be here drinking all alone in this bar on a Tuesday night? Yeah, she left me without warning this morning so the rumor you heard is right No, I didn't think of calling you or any of my friends Priority one was making this heartache end And with all due respect You can't help me forget...cuz... YOU’RE NOT TEQUILA You can't numb the pain Or make me so hungover in the morning Her m...

Picture Credit: mymichiganbeach.com Lead and Harmony Vocals: Dewey Longuski Harmony Vocals: Cherie Hagen It's a two-hour ride to go one-mile And the traffic's light and flowing On this inner tube in my cut off blues With my fingers and my toes in... This beautiful river As I stare up through the pines Like it's the very first time I've seen a summer sky STREAMIN’ Slow and easy down Big Sauble Can'...

BEER GOES WITH EVERYTHING I'm just a good ol boy with a few friends in high places And last week one of the aforementioned got a suite for some horse races Guess I faux pas'd up ordering prime rib and white wine Cuz them stiff-necked folks looked down their noses shocked and mortified Well I don't have a PhD in the science of grape-ology But I know one libation meant for any food I'm tastin' BEER...