Dear Hank & John

Why don't I have a lifelong friend? How can I become ruler of everyone with my name? What are snails trying to flee?? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy at http...

What counts as significant change? How do you know who you're supposed to buy presents for? Is it weird to let someone know you're thinking of them? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankand...

What do you do with cereal dust? What happens if kid doesn't like dog? How did cave people cut their fingernails? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy at https://...

How do you surprise loved ones in small apartments? What is the line between archaeology and grave robbing? What is the appropriate time to get into the Christmas season? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! t...

What is the smallest part of the body you can be a doctor in? Why do we rub our eyes when we're tired? How do I turn my imagination off long enough to sleep? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/de...

Over the last month, Hank and John have been on the road going to cities all across America. Every stop, they did a short episode of Dear Hank and John, and some of those got recorded. Then Hank edited some of the best of those moments into this podcast. How do I promote my guinea pig's Instagram? Is it cold in space? When did you first feel successful? And Many Other Questions Answered!​ Email us...

Is outer space full of vampires? Am I engaged? Why haven't our mouths evolved to be better at pumpkin spice lattes? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy at https:...

Where does candle wax go? Can you just switch where you're sitting one day? Does saying "I love you" eventually lose its meaning? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Po...

How do I get in on my neighbor's cranberry bread? How do I live in a very small room? Who's responsible for the divider in a checkout line? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See...

Where does all the extra body come from? Why are grapefruits called grapefruits? Is it acceptable to talk about social media in real life? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See P...

How do I stop whistling? How do you not get burned out? How do I get rid of a death zit? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankdandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and Ca...

What do I say to my blind date? How do I get my mom to call me less frequently? Are you supposed to ask a father for his daughter's hand in marriage? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankan...

Why do I feel safer with the lights on? Why can't my bathtub be in my living room? Am I in danger of being electrocuted? And more! Turtles All the Way Down tour: http://www.turtlesallthewaydownbook.com/#tour Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjo...

How far can you get making only right turns? What's the proper response to being constantly serenaded? Does fire have mass? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy a...

Is cake salty? How do I get alone time at a party without a cigarette? Where is the rest of An Imperial Affliction? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy at https:...

Why am I afraid of something I know doesn’t exist? Can I avoid scurvy by sticking my arm in a giant vat of orange juice? What is proper etiquette for a cat birthday party? And more! Get 10% off your first purchase by going to hover.com/dearhank or hover.com/dearjohn Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. J...

What is a mug without a handle? When's the right time to get a Saturn tattoo? Should I come out when I'm not ready? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy at https:...

Could you take down a coyote with your arms? Should people be allowed to put things in someone else's Netflix queue? How do I cope with social anxiety? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhank...

What would happen if all mosquitoes die? What do I do about my surprise YouTube celebrity boyfriend? What's the truth about John Lennon's "Imagine"? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankand...

Who was the first joshing Josh? Do bugs understand glass? How do I learn to chill? And more! probablysignedturtles.com Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy at https://art19...

What do I do if my spouse wants to shave his head? Why are there birds at the airport? What if I'm not as well read as my boyfriend? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy...

How do you deal with the dissipation of your future plans? Should I tell my parents I met my boyfriend on Tinder? How do I succeed if I'm not a go-getter? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearh...

When should I introduce my kid to Star Wars? Can I dislike parts of my life even though I have privilege? How did humans start swimming? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Pri...

If you put in work to be lazy, is it still laziness? Does Lin Manuel Miranda listen to Hamilton for funzies? At what point are you supposed to put water on a toothbrush? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! tw...

What should my fun fact about me be? How do Christians and non-Christians get along? Am I too old to listen to this podcast? And more! Email us: hankandjohn@gmail.com patreon.com/dearhankandjohn If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com. Join us for monthly livestreams at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn See Privacy Policy...