Dear Black Gay Men Podcast

A trip to Atlanta's nude club night, "Reveal," taught me that I'm probably better off single in this season of life. Read "I Made 6 Guys Cum At The Park" https://bit.ly/4jFmRx3 -- Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Single Life Levels 00:09 Coincidentally Single 00:39 Intentionally Single 00:56 Temporarily Single 01:28 Podcast Introduction 02:09 Church Announcements 05:12 Breakup Reflections 07:53 Less...

00:00 Introduction: Post-Breakup Reflections 01:31 New Features: Substack and Live Shows 04:10 Church Announcements: Updates and Membership 04:42 Personal Story: Lessons from a Breakup 07:51 Dating Insights: Commitment and Communication 17:44 Final Thoughts: The Importance of Perseverance 23:53 Closing Remarks: Stay Connected This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subsc...

Playing With Fire My eyes opened and my heart sank. I was expecting a “Good Morning Jarrett”. The same text I’d received everyday for the past 3 months. But today there was no good morning greeting, no salutation from the guy I loved. Nothing. Yesterday I was in love and today I’m alone. Saturday he dumped me. I thought we were getting closer and finding our way. Little did I know that the next fo...

I spent 3 months on dating apps with 0 matches… For a while I thought I wasn’t what Black guys desired, but really, it was a deeper key that I was missing: intention…both mine and theirs. Dating is a combination of time and effort. Some of us have a lot of time to date, but don’t focus our effort in a way that moves us down our journey to happiness. Others have effort, but no time. Some have neith...

Let’s watch some Netflix… I thought this was enough for quality time: you’re here; I’m here. We’re spending time so it has to be quality. Then I met Brandon. He checked all the boxes of the non-negotiables that Lamont talked about on his appearance on Dear Black Gay Men Podcast. But every time we spent time together, I felt more alone with Brandon than I did without him. Quality is relative Our lo...

It could all be so simple, but… We’d rather make the dating process so hard. It boils down to ego keeping us from what we actually want. Desire says, “I want a man.” But ego says “I’m independent.” Desire says, “I’m ready to date”. But ego says “Say less.” Ego is that thing lingering in the back of our mind that protects who we are from the outside and we think it keeps us safe. Ego is that piece...

Dating has gotten way too complicated, but… It’s not the dating. It’s me. Underneath all the fluff, and heartache, and trauma all of us have endured, we all want the same thing: to be desired, to be wanted, and to be loved. Dating is the pathway each of us has to walk to fulfill that desire—the process of figuring out who we are and sharing it with someone special. New uploads EVERY DAY Support th...

I feel like dating has gotten so complicated Not that I’m old or anything, but there was a time when you saw someone at the club or out in gay spaces, walked over to him, asked his number. Probably jotted it on a napkin, and you pursued happiness. Now, as this experience would have it, men get to see you, build a narrative around who you are and how you carry yourself, then react to, ghost, or den...

Thank GOD I didn't f*ck this man... ➡️ Become an Insider: https://youtube.com/@dearblackgaymen/join ➡️ Join the newsletter: http://dearblackgaymen.substack.com 📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men Podcast Apple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4 Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7s YT: YouTube.com/@DearBlackGayMen 🎶 Theme music by The Passion HIFI Our purpose is to be the voice of our culture: talking...

While I was cruising on the apps one day, this guy's profile really rubbed me the wrong way. I realized that I don't like condoms, but not for the reason you'd think. This episode is dedicated to overcoming condoms so we can get free. Condoms: Explained on Dear Black Gay Men LIVE Follow @ JaiTheGentleman on IG, @DearBlackGayMen on IG. Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men on YouTube This is a public epi...

It's been a while since I've uploaded to this platform and explanations are in order. I did take a little while to sort through some personal things. Nothing major, but this episode is dedicated to one of the big lessons that I uncovered during my time away from the mic. Follow @JaiTheGentleman on IG , @dearblackgaymen on IG . Tune in to the live show every Thursday at 8pm Eastern on YouTube This...

Noah's Arc was mym 2005 dating goals before dating goals were even a thing. I remember going to Best Buy to buy the box set so I could dream about outing a piece of trade and living happily ever after. Now, nearly 20 years later, I can watch Noah's Arc with a different set of dating eyes. I can see where they went wrong, what dating lessons should I have left on TV, and which ones can I learn from...

This one is pretty vulnerable for me, but I'll admit it boldly: I'm a gaslighter. My last relationship had to end because I did some dirty stuff while we were together. Ralph Pittman is the human gaslight and I only know that because the way he messed up Drew is exactly how I acted in my last serious dating situation. But so many of our listeners/viewers are still up-in-the-air about what gaslight...

Sl*t shaming aside, Ali Adamos is good at doing many things. He can get countless men to give him exactly what he wants---usually exactly HOW he wants it. Isn't that our dating dream? Getting a guy to date us, be with us, love us HOW we want to be loved? After I 💦 and I could think clearly, I looked at Ali, what he says, how he moves through life to attract so many men and there was one BIG lesso...

 @OpenRelationshipPodcast  is one of our faves here on the channel. The hosts give different perspectives on gay dating, Black LGBTQ social issues and everything A to Z about Black gay culture. But this particular story rubbed me the wrong way and I think Rodney may have it wrong. I am not trans, nor am I a parent, so most may take my perspectives with a grain of salt, but Neyo story has us questi...

I know it’s Leo season, but this lesson in Gemini dating hit me so hard this week. I went on a date, asked the guy “what are you looking for?’ Of course, in true gay fashion, he responded “I’m not really looking.” For some reason, we’ll go looking for EVERYTHING in the world except a date. We’ll look for money, cars, degrees, jobs, customers, but love is something we expect to fall in our lap. Thi...

 @BishopOCAllen  renewed his vows to his husband of 20 years, Rashad Burgess. Allen, who I call “B”, said he hates folding clothes. To the untrained ear, that sounds like something you discover over a 20 year marriage. But to me, I thought how dope it is that he’s self-aware enough to know that about himself and to say it publicly. This episode is dedicated to helping each of us single people grow...

Have you ever met a guy, got a number, texted for a while, a couple dates, but just can't make it over the 90-day hump? After so many failed dating attempts, it's easy to think it's either all men...or it's got to be me. This episode of the podcast is here to show us that it's a little of column A, a little of column B. A whole lot of luck and the right kind of work. What kind of work should we be...

I don't want to say EVERYONE has cheated, but have a relationship or dating commitment violated is an experience way too many gay guys have in common. I'm a cheater. I had a wonderful relationship that fell apart because of a lot of issues I brought into the dating situation. Now that I've worked through my ish (I am a single guru after all - https://youtu.be/sY4ubstbX-c ) and I've dealt with my i...

New uploads WEDNESDAYS & THURSDAYS Support the Channel: https://bit.ly/43lQ2N9 Listen to the podcast: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4 I really don’t think Black gay men are singling right. When it comes to dating, there is some intention we have to put behind who we allow into our lives. This post is a must see for any Black gay guy who is looking to get back into the dating pool. What should you...

When's the last time somebody asked you if you're a top or bottom? For me it was a couple days ago just before a first date. He was more interested in my position than he was in the date. Then I got the lesson. ➡️ Become an Insider: http://www.dearblackgaymen/subscribe 📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men Podcast Apple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4 Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7s YT: YouTube.c...

Gee Smalls is the Jai-appointed king of nudism in Atlanta. I'm worried about what to wear on an upcoming cabin trip, meanwhile he's naked on the gram. Then I got the lesson. ➡️ Join Dear Black Gay Men Insiders for exclusive content FB Group: https:// bit.ly/3wsiWx4 📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men Podcast Apple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4 Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7s YT: YouTube.com/@...

I was traveling for an entanglement--not a date, not a relationship--a purely physical exchange when I got a big lesson about hook-up culture and how it's an analogy for Black gay culture at large. ➡️ Join Dear Black Gay Men Insiders for exclusive content FB Group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4 📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men Podcast Apple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4 Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9...

I remember when I used to watch older guys in the club thinking, "where yo man at?" I swore that I'd have me a husband before I end up 40 in the club... ➡️ Join Dear Black Gay Men Insiders for exclusive content FB Group: https:// bit.ly/3wsiWx4 📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men Podcast Apple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4 Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7s YT: YouTube.com/@DearBlackGayMen 🎶 Th...

We go live Thursdays at 8pm EST! Join the group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4 Listen to the podcast: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4 Knowing what we want in a relationship sounds good on its face, but some of us have taken "knowing" to an unhealthy extent. This week's episode of Dear Black Gay Men Podcast is focused on a date I went on with "Victor" and some of the pitfalls that come with being a single ma...