Business Pants

Story of the Week (DR): UnitedHealth Group CEO Andrew Witty steps down for 'personal reasons' MM DR UnitedHealth Under Investigation: UnitedHealth Group is facing a criminal probe by the U.S. Department of Justice for potential Medicare fraud related to its Medicare Advantage program. The company is also dealing with a civil fraud investigation and has suspended its 2025 financial forecast amid ri...

DAMION1 In our 'That's cute, Sam, because I don't want my son to grow up in a world where college dropouts slowly replace human brain function with profit-driven AI' headline of the week. Sam Altman doesn't want his son to grow up with an AI best friend   In our 'In other news, Ikea will call its forthcoming store in Boston simply 'Ikea,' sources say' headline of the week. ESPN will call its...

Story of the Week (DR): Berkshire board names Greg Abel as CEO, Buffett to remain chair Warren Buffett says he'll propose Greg Abel take over as Berkshire Hathaway CEO at year-end Warren Buffett makes surprise announcement: He's stepping down as Berkshire Hathaway CEO OpenAI   backs off push to become for-profit company In a nutshell, with help from its chatbot: “OpenAI has restructured into...

DAMION1 Kohl’s CEO Fired for Funneling Business to Romantic Partner 10 Kohl’s boss Ashley Buchanan tried to funnel business to a romantic partner and lost his job. It wasn’t the first time their personal and professional lives had crossed. Kohl’s fired Buchanan on Thursday after it discovered he had instructed the retailer to enter into a “highly unusual” business deal involving a woman with whom...

DAMION1 White House blasts Amazon over tariff cost report: ‘Hostile and political act’ The White House on Tuesday slammed Amazon  for reportedly planning to display the cost of President Donald Trump’s tariffs next to the total price of products on its site. “This is hostile and political act by Amazon,” White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt told reporters. “Why didn’t Amazon do this w...

Story of the Week (DR): CEOs to the rescue? Trio Of Top CEOs Warn Trump Tariffs Will Empty Store Shelves During a private meeting in the Oval Office on Monday, the CEOs of Walmart, Target and Home Depot reportedly told the president that supply chains could freeze and prompt stores’ shelves to go barren if he doesn’t rein in his sharp tariff plans, and meddles with the Federal Reserve. Target CEO...

Tech Bro Nonsense Former Google CEO Tells Congress That 99 Percent of All Electricity Will Be Used to Power Superintelligent AI billionaire tech tycoon and former Google CEO Eric Schmidt comments to the House Committee on Energy and Commerce: "What we need from you is we need the energy in all forms, renewable, non-renewable, whatever. It needs to be there, and it needs to be there quickly." "Many...

Sam Altman says Miyazaki should get over it, AI vs A1, and Zuck testifies

Adverbs are bad, tariffs are bigly, Enron’s desk gets pardoned, cybertruck flipoff metrics

CEO chokes, Trump’s tariff penguins, ESG needs a spine, chicken nuggets, and Starbuck at Heritage

France is for DEI, Primark CEO #MeToo, Tesla rage, Fink’s new-old letter, and Bill Burr needs a job at ISS

Nikola investors lose, climate targets accelerate, oil execs buy Teslas, and ISS can’t find ANYTHING WRONG at BP

Who to blame: Hormel’s CEO search, “eat now pay later”, DOI vs. DEI, and Signal’s woke board

Introduction LIVE from a bottomless pit of CEO pay, it’s a Business Pants Friday Show here at March 21st Studios, featuring AnalystHole Matt Moscardi. On today’s weekly wrap up: Nelson Peltz hates woke ice cream, Self-hating Cybertrucks, and anti-ESG manbabies  Our show today is being sponsored by Free Float Analytics, the only platform measuring board power, connections, and performance for...

Jamie Dimon says death to ISS, billionaire snowflakes, board burnout, CEOs feel “stuck” by Trump

ISS’s Disney flip flop, EPA sells cars now, OpenAI demands no guardrails, and CEOs get $$$

Conservative snowflake word policing, illegal to boycott Tesla, Qantas’ chair, and nepobaby merit in Biz Nuggets

Kroger’s CEO fired, State Street’s ESG loss, meritocracy is fake, and corporate blame games

GOOD GAME: ESG is now “resilience”, Kroger’s CEO leaves, Tesla owners hate Musk, State Street loves nominating committees

The WWEification of the US, Capital One’s keeping the interest, and DEI “wins” at Apple

Blame Game: Buffett’s genetic skill, United Health’s shareholder pushback, JPM Dimon’s flip floppery

Introduction LIVE from your ESG and DEI Teeth Bleaching Kit, it’s a Business Pants Friday Show here at February 21st Studios, featuring AnalystHole Matt Moscardi. On today’s weekly wrap up: Canada still cares, Rupert Murdoch knows how to text, the illusion of meritocracy, and an important new announcement from YouTube Our show today is being sponsored by Free Float Analytics, the only platform mea...

Blackrock and Vanguard “pause” corporate meetings, SEC’s boardroom power shift in the sarcastic Good Game

Introduction LIVE from your ESG ESG ESG ESG DEI DEI DEI Climate Change Change Climate Change Global Warming ESG DEI,  it’s a Business Pants Friday Show here at Valentine’s Day Studios, featuring AnalystHole Matt Moscardi. On today’s weekly wrap up: Corporate Abolitionists, The Gulf of Stupidity, The S in ISS stands for Shitty, and Denny’s Truth Bomb  Our show today is being sponsored by...

Live from a stack of DEI-hating lead independent directors dipped in milk chocolate, it’s an all-new Whacky Wednesday edition of Business Pants. Joined by Analyst-Hole Matt Moscardi! On today's Twizzler-shaped proxy voting policy called February 12th 2025: Biz Nuggets! Our show today is being sponsored by Free Float Analytics, the only platform measuring board power, connections, and performance f...