Bottomless to Sober

In this episode: I dive into the powerful quote by Nedra Glover Tawwab: "We teach people how to treat us by how we treat ourselves," reflecting on a moment at work when I had to assert my boundaries with a student and contrasting it with my past struggles as a teacher battling alcohol addiction and self-doubt. Resources : Bottomless to Sober – Coaching, Classes, and Workshops⁠⁠ ⁠Six-Week Writing t...

In this episode: In this episode, I shares my personal journey with addiction and the painful realization that no amount of love or intervention can save someone struggling with addiction—only the individual can choose to change. Drawing on my own experiences and a listener’s inquiry, I explain that while setting healthy boundaries is essential for those who support someone in recovery, self-care...

In this episode: Valentine’s Day once amplified my feelings of lack and low self-worth, fueling my drinking and poor relationship choices. In this episode, I share how alcohol blurred red flags in dating and the moment I first admitted, “I think I might be an alcoholic.” Sobriety gave me clarity—red flags stay red now. Let’s reframe this season as a reminder of what we do have: self-worth, clarity...

In this episode: How we see ourselves shapes the choices we make every day. In this episode, I dive into the game-changing concept from James Clear’s Atomic Habits : the power of identity-based habits. I share how fully embracing the mindset of “I’m a non-drinker” can become a turning point in anyone's sobriety journey—helping me push past societal pressures and self-doubt. We’ll explore how s...

In this episode: Can joy and grief coexist? In this episode, I reflect on welcoming my daughter, Amara, while mourning my mother, Amable Rojas Vargas. From her journey from Costa Rica to Brooklyn to the complexities of our relationship, I explore the beauty in duality through the lens of sobriety and recovery. I also dive into the grip of fear—how it shapes our choices, from plane crashes to every...

In this episode: Motherhood, success, and relationships often come with rigid societal expectations, but I've chosen a different route—one that prioritizes authenticity and personal growth over conventional norms. Living with 650 college students while navigating parenthood and sobriety was never on my life plan, yet here I am, embracing this unconventional journey. Listen in as I've learn...

In this episode: I share how my once-social relationship with alcohol turned into a hidden struggle during my early years as a teacher. We’ll explore the intense pressures of the classroom, the risks of unhealthy coping mechanisms, and the urgent warning from the U.S. Surgeon General about alcohol. Drawing comparisons to the historical shift in tobacco awareness, I highlight the importance of info...

In this episode : In this episode of Bottomless to Sober , I return after a long (super long) hiatus to share life updates, including the birth of my daughter, Amara, and my journey into motherhood. I reflect on how sobriety has equipped her to navigate the fear and uncertainty of major life changes, from her early delivery due to health concerns to the sleepless nights of newborn care. I also rev...

In this episode: Feeling like you might be the odd one out at social gatherings because you've chosen sobriety? You’re not alone. In this episode, I share tips to help you decide if navigating social events where alcohol is often front and center is something you are ready for. Resources: Bottomless to Sober – Coaching, Classes, and Workshops Transcript

In this episode: Preventing substance use in children starts earlier than you might think—right from kindergarten. In this eye-opening episode, I welcome Jessica Lahey, an educator, New York Times bestselling author, and speaker, who shares insights from her book The Addiction Inoculation: Raising Healthy Kids in a Culture of Dependence . Jessica highlights the developmental differences in how you...

In this episode: Join me as I share a deeply personal journey through grief and family dynamics in this heartfelt episode. Through the lens of my own story, I explore the impact of my oldest sister Sandra's sudden passing and the intricate relationships among siblings with significant age and cultural differences. Despite these gaps, the bond we share as our mother's children remains a pow...

In this episode: When my patience was pushed to its limits by a friend who saw the glass perpetually half empty, I stumbled upon a profound truth about standing firm in who you are. That's what this episode is all about: peeling back the layers to be our authentic selves and find the places where we belong without pretense.  Resources: Six-Week Writing to Heal Program Transcript

In this episode: Join me on a journey of self-discovery and transformation with my dear friend and cycle breaker coach, Priscilla María. Priscilla María is a Keynote Speaker and Certified Trauma Recovery Coach who empowers others to become cycle breakers. Some cycles her clients are courageously breaking are unresolved trauma, childhood wounds, people-pleasing, self-doubt, domestic violence, and s...

CW: discussion of intimate partner violence In this episode: There's a profound mix of beauty and pain in the narrative of my family, from my grandmother's sacrifices of selling lottery tickets to avoid returning to an abuser's home to the cultural tradition of silence that influenced my own journey in mental health. Honoring the choices of our women before me and discerning what to ca...

In this episode: Join me as I candidly share personal experiences, answering powerful questions from a recent Q&A that touch on self-confidence, sobriety, moderation, and the complexities of dating without the influence of substances. It is a conversation that celebrates the small yet significant choices that forge the path to reclaiming not just sobriety, but also the self-esteem that addicti...

In this episode: I share Chris's story, one of the first people I interviewed for Bottomless to Sober. Chris's early beginnings, marked by being born into addiction and later adopted, set the stage for a life of searching and self-discovery. His challenges with substance use, identity, and the moments of connecting with his biological parents, offer a raw glimpse into the complexities of h...

In this episode: Listen in as I share a personal narrative, starting with my mom’s unwavering lunch routine that travels from Brooklyn to Costa Rica, and how it serves as a launchpad for a larger conversation on inherited beliefs. I tackle the importance of questioning the doctrines passed down by our mothers and consider the influence of societal structures like patriarchy on these generational p...

In this episode: Listen in as I share a personal narrative, starting with my mom's unwavering lunch routine that travels from Brooklyn to Costa Rica, and how it serves as a launchpad for a larger conversation on inherited beliefs. I tackle the importance of questioning the doctrines passed down by our mothers and consider the influence of societal structures like patriarchy on these generation...

Happy Celestial Birthday, Ian. Storytelling saves lives. If you're interested in telling your story on this podcast or as a blog post, please email me: jessica@bottomlesstosober.com or consider joining my upcoming Writing for Healing class.

In this episode: In this introspective episode, I dive deep into the core of our desire to please others. Is this drive a subtle quest for control, or is it rooted in age-old survival tactics? I challenge you to consider the possibility of deeper truths lying beneath the surface of people-pleasing behaviors. Before you cast judgment on yourself for seeking approval, pause and reflect with me: &quo...

Please note there was a weird audio issue with this episode, so if you don't like it, please skip it because I was not going to re-record. In this episode: I'm minding my own business when suddenly, my sister sends a bombshell text reminder – apparently, I got married 11 years ago. I forget I have lived what feels like 100 years in less than 40 years. So, in this episode, I reflect on the...

In this episode: This episode isn't just about recounting childhood memories of me stealing money for food; it's an exploration of how writing can serve as a potent tool for healing. I discuss the cathartic experience of writing about one of my childhood stories and how it helps untangle the deep-rooted issues that often lead to substance abuse. By embracing the lessons of our past, much l...

In this episode: Recognizing that engaging romantically can be a massive trigger for those on a healing journey, I sought the guidance of Eliza Boquin, a licensed psychotherapist, couples therapist, and certified sex therapist for this episode. With notable features on platforms like Bustle and Cosmo, Eliza brings a wealth of expertise to the table. We dive into the delicate intersection of healin...

In this episode: Navigating the complex emotions of recovery is no small feat, yet understanding the principles of Don Miguel Ruiz's  The Four Agreements  gives us tools to foster peace, self-compassion and clarity. This episode is a testament to the healing potential of these agreements, especially within the framework of sobriety.  Resources: The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz Bottomless...

In this episode: CW: pregnancy loss and death by overdose This episode touches on the unlearning that happens when "doing the next right thing" is overshadowed by life's cruelest twists. I discuss how recovery has taught me to handle the hard things, including navigating a miscarriage—a topic often kept silent yet desperately needing a voice. Resources: Bottomless to Sober – Coaching...