PodcastOne

Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet

Comedy EN ↓ 449 episodes

A comedy podcast featuring dramatic readings of one-star reviews written by real people with not-so-real problems. Hosted by siblings Xandy and Christine Schiefer.

Author

PodcastOne

Episodes

247: Reviews of Haunted Hotels 23.08.2023 1:08:28

Fun fact: hot springs in Arkansas are an aphrodisiac! Check out our new merch store! https://www.beachtoosandy.store Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoos...

246: Dr. Christine 16.08.2023 48:57

Messy self always. Check out our new merch store! https://www.beachtoosandy.store Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy Logo by Courtney Aventura. The...

245: Reviews of Topgolf 09.08.2023 1:05:01

This episode is NOT brought to you by Big Beef. Check out our new merch store! https://www.beachtoosandy.store Watch videos from our episodes on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy L...

244: Reviews of Squishmallows 02.08.2023 1:28:06

We apologize for what this episode does for Temu coffin sales. Check out our new merch store! https://www.beachtoosandy.store Last chance to get live show tickets! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandys...

243: Reviews of Hobby Lobby 26.07.2023 52:31

Ts and Ps for all the victims of the retail apocalypse. Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy Logo by Courtney Aventura. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. Le...

242: Reviews of Smut 19.07.2023 1:29:18

We apologize for what this episode does for holy chrism oil sales. Last chance to get live show tickets! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosand...

241: Reviews of Whole Foods 12.07.2023 1:14:24

Help support independent filmmakers! https://bit.ly/3O1ujpb Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy Logo by Co...

240: Reviews of Thrift Stores 05.07.2023 1:08:45

For mormon’s sake, don’t come near Fort Schiefer. We will hit on sight. Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy...

239: Reviews of County Fairs and Porn 28.06.2023 1:14:47

This one goes out to all the dirty birds. Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy Logo by Courtney Aventura. Th...

238: Twilight or Classic Literature? 21.06.2023 52:33

Tune in to find out what book is full of sexually frustrated cannibals! Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/beachtoosandy...

237: Reviews of Classic Literature 14.06.2023 55:10

I liked the ending of this episode. The part where it ended. Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Buy some stuff! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitc...

236: Reviews of Twilight 07.06.2023 1:11:44

when i saw this podcast live, there were team xandy girls in the bathroom and they wouldnt let team xtine girls enter Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Buy some stuff! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: htt...

235: Reviews of Themed Bed and Breakfasts 31.05.2023 1:29:06

You certainly won't be trapped psychotherapeutically while listening to this episode. Promise. Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Buy some stuff! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/...

234: Reviews of Vacation Bible Schools 24.05.2023 1:12:15

Description: The hypocrites who produced this episode will be judged by the Lord in full, LOL. Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Buy some stuff! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/haunt...

233: Reviews of 90s Computer Games 17.05.2023 1:28:49

Freddi Fish, Putt-Putt, Spy Fox, Pajama Sam, and Fatty Bear walk into a podcast episode... Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Buy some stuff! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedto...

232: Reviews of Coachella 10.05.2023 52:01

If every duck was a balloon, the world might be a better place. Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Buy some stuff! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: tw...

231: Reviews of Preschools 03.05.2023 1:03:06

This week we ponder a question as old as time: Are rats in a preschool better dead or alive? Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your mystery pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com...

230: Reviews of Disney Channel Original Movies 26.04.2023 1:28:33

ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM YOU MAKE MY HEART GO BOOM BOOM Get your live show tickets now! https://www.beachtoosandy.com Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your mystery pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xa...

229: Reviews of Weed 19.04.2023 1:11:52

Happy 4/20 to those who celebrate! Sincere apologies to those who don't... Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your mystery pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagra...

228: Reviews of Rage Rooms 12.04.2023 1:13:30

Put your belongings in a garbage bag lined crate, throw on your enormous gardening gloves, and prepare to feel the rage COFFIN Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your mystery pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Str...

227: Reviews of Hallmark Movies 05.04.2023 1:04:31

This week we discover that Zak Bagans is just a regular normal guy! Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your Clam Volcano pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram:...

226: Reviews of 90s Sitcoms 29.03.2023 1:37:51

20 years from now Beach Too Sandy will have been consigned to the dustbin of forgotten podcasts... Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your Clam Volcano pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandysc...

225: Reviews of Amusement Parks 22.03.2023 1:13:09

Sending good vibes from Grandma poopy 1 2 3 4 5! Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your Clam Volcano pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: instagram.com/bea...

224: Reviews of Breastaurants 15.03.2023 1:18:52

Christine's comedy might be legendary, but Hooters is no place for it. Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your Clam Volcano pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagr...

223: Reviews of Pawn Shops 08.03.2023 1:10:45

Christine no likey this episode. But Xandy likey very muchy! Follow us on TikTok! https://tiktok.com/@beachtoosandy Get your Clam Volcano pin!!! https://store.dftba.com/collections/beach-too-sandy-water-too-wet Support us on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/beachtoosandy Xtine's Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/hauntedtofu Xandy's Stream: twitch.tv/xandyschiefer Check out our Instagram: insta...