Basketball Illuminati

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes have been infiltrated by the NFL. Put Your Buffs On. Who is the Lamar Jackson of the NBA? Tom explains why James Harden isn't the right comp. Truth Teller Kalyn Kahler joins the show to discuss her article that pulled back the curtain on the pattern of coaching agent representation in the NFL. Basketball Illuminati is now part of the Count T...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes want to send the Jazz team name back to New Orleans, and play musical chairs to make it happen. A word keeps popping up that has caught our third eye: Accountability. Are Draymond Green, Zion Williamson, and Jimmy Butler truly accountable for their actions? Or simply the consequences? Finally, Amin has an Inconvenient Truth about the NBA's n...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes give JJ Redick some advice on how to respond to Charles Barkley's impromptu rant against him. The Jimmy Butler situation has escalated, and Tom connects the dots between Bradley Beal's benching in Phoenix and the family ties that could send him to Detroit. Truth Teller Jorge Sedano joins the show to discuss the state of Heat Culture, his top...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes got LeBron a 40th birthday present: A D'Angelo Russell trade back to Brooklyn. Six months after signing a 3 year contract extension, and a little more than year removed from winning Coach of the Year, Mike Brown was fired by the Sacramento Kings. Then Truth Teller Ethan Strauss of House of Strauss joins the show to discuss the NFL's attack o...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes are here to remind you about the LeBron James of Feet and his Healing Hans. Recently crowned the top front office in the NBA, Amin has an Inconvenient Truth about Sam Presti's magical draft pick acquisitions. Finally, Truth Teller Jake Fischer makes his triumphant return to the podcast to discuss Dennis Schroder to the Warriors, the future o...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes have discovered another member of Michael Jordan's inner circle (besides Amin, who joined in October). An intrepid conspiracist (@FrankBurner222) has unveiled a theory he claims to be the biggest scam in sports: Nikola Jokic's fraudulent manipulation of analytics nerds to farm MVPs. Finally, it happened folks, LeBron's quest to play all 82 g...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes solve the problem that Will Hardy faced while trying to call a timeout in crunch time against the Lakers. Anthony Edwards is tired of his teammates having their own agendas, wants everybody to have the same agenda. But who specifically is he talking about? LaVar Ball is back in our lives, telling the Hornets not worry and promising that 'Hel...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes investigate a variety of frustrated coaches word choices after their teams got blown out. How should you behave after a loss? Reports of the 76ers team meeting last week were leaked in incredibly descriptive detail shortly after it took place. What motivations drove the rat or mole to share this information? Tom Did His Own Research on Donov...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes discuss the implications of TNT's 'Inside the NBA' being broadcast on ESPN. This past weekend featured a heavy dose of the NBA taking accountability for bad calls in their Pool Reports & Last Two Minute Reports. Most aggrieved were the Bucks, who capped off a week of referee contention with a $25k fine for Doc Rivers and an Illuminati coded...

Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes check in on Woj's dormant twitter account and discover signs of life. The Lakers dreamy 3-0 start to the season has faded into a more true to life 6-4 record with some bumps and bruises along the way. However, this hasn't stopped Dream Journal LeBron sharing tales from his mind palace, that all seem to involved Duke for some reason. Tom did...

Codebreakers abound this week on Illuminati. We're two weeks into the NBA season and some long simmering pots have come to a boil. In Charlotte, Grant Williams was ejected after he hip checked former teammate and alleged friend Jayson Tatum, ruining their dinner plans that evening. In Philadelphia, local columnist Marcus Hayes incited the wrath of Joel Embiid with some transgressive comments about...

Way back in March of 2022, Tom Amin and Mayes interviewed the entrepreneur behind Ballsack Sports, who was changing the social media landscape with his deceptive misinformation. Now we're living in a new era, where any unsuspecting person can get clipped by the Marlo to Ballsack's Avon Barksdale: NBA Centel. We also bring in Wosny Lambre aka Big Wos of the Ringer to discuss an aggrieved Clippers'...

As the Illuminarmy Generals have broken their year long silence, Tom was the victim of a social media hack and Amin was taken captive on his trip to the Basketball HOF. Tom Did His Own Research on which agencies have the most salary accrued from and the largest volume of players on each team in the association. However, in order to make sense of it, we must explain the Camden Connection. Finally,...

On September 18th, ESPN Senior NBA Insider Adrian Wojnarowski retired to become the GM of the men's basketball program at St. Bonaventure. On October 7th, Woj's former protegé Shams Charania replaced him as ESPN's new Senior NBA Insider. Much like a stunning twist in a season finale of Succession, this shakeup in the news breaker hierarchy came as a surprise to many, but for those with their third...

The Illuminarmy generals are back! Tom Haberstroh, Amin Elhassan and producer Anthony Mayes have returned with their third eyes wide open to update the Illumination on a foundation shaking event that transpired while they were underground. In June, Tom discovered statistical irregularities in one of the most important pillars of Michael Jordan's mythology: his 1988 Defensive Player of the Year awa...

While the rest of the league has been working on bulking up and getting in shape, Media Day has us in our feelings thanks to Jimmy Butler's new look. Damian Lillard to Milwaukee, Jrue Holiday to Boston, everyone but Tyler Herro to Portland... It was a busy weekend. Meanwhile, Nikola Jokic clocks back in to work. The voice of Basketball Illuminati himself Pablo Torre is here to share how he found o...

Dwyane Wade has started a campaign to tell every other superstar player that they were the reason he called and asked LeBron to take his talents to South Beach. The Warriors finally solved their depth issues... By bringing in renowned bleeping tough guy Rodney McGruder instead of Juan Toscano Anderson? Finally, limited fake Tim Bontemps Did His Own Research, surveying league insiders about who's g...

An intrepid Twitter researcher @OtownNBA compiled a list of players that have racked up the most 'Bang!' calls by Mike Breen in the last decade. As the Damian Lillard saga drags on towards training camp, the Illuminati look back at the greatest September trades in history, including an NBA Finals loser bringing in a star that propelled them to a title. Then Tom Did His Own Research on which cities...

The day after Novak Djokovic celebrated his 24th title and honored Kobe Bryant with a Mamba Forever shirt, Aaron Rodgers tore his achilles wearing the number 8. What is going on in NY? The league's competition committee is incorporating a new fine system to govern star player rest, however there are a plethora of exceptions, which we are calling the NBA Acceptable Rest Protocol. Team USA came up s...

Andre Drummond makes a bold proclamation about his career and hall of fame status, so the Illumination digs into the numbers behind his claim. Despite a brief hitch in their giddyup against Lithuania, Team USA rolled Italy in the FIBA quarterfinals, and there might be a motivational factor hiding in plain sight. Finally, back at the end of May, we brought on a Truth Teller that connected the dots...

Paul George has thrown his proverbial hat in the ring, so the Illuminati compares his Chucky Barkley impression to Kenan Thompson and Aries Spears. Sprinter Noah Lyles incites the wrath of the NBA comments section, Rondae Hollis-Jefferson is the Kobe of Jordan, and Rudy Gobert takes accountability for France being eliminated from the FIBA World Cup. Tom Does His Own Research on last year's Ref Sco...

A former NBA social media employee took to Facebook to air his grievances and promote his new consulting business after asking how to log out of the official NBA account. The James Harden saga continues with a healthy hundred thousand dollar fine from the association, but DA Amin Elhassan takes the case to defend him in Illuminati Court. Finally, do the NY Knicks have a serious grievance with a fo...

Kyrie Irving is back in a big way, driving content on all segments of this show, and revealing his sworn fealty to a lord by wearing a certain number. Amin reports back from his experience at the Hall of Fame induction this past weekend, and tries to share credit with Curt Gowdy Media Award winner Marc Spears. James Harden broke the code on his dissatisfaction with the 76ers by calling Daryl Morey...

Tom has started a new Substack, The Finder, and we want you to find out why. Kevin Garnett is wondering where the all the mid level bread is located, so we head to the Illuminati bakery to prove that there's a lot more out there than you might think. Paolo Banchero is suiting for Team USA in this FIBA World Cup, and Amin unveils the truth of why he left Italy's national team behind in a quite inco...

Anthony Edwards is changing his jersey number, causing us to dip back into our numerology bag of tricks to interpret the significance. Jeff Van Gundy and Mark Jackson are out while Doc Rivers and Doris Burke are in as ESPN shakes up their NBA Finals commentator team. Admiral of the IllumiNavy and Economics Professor Scott Kaplan joins the show to discuss his paper discussing 'The Distributional Im...