Ascension To Ten

Well we didn't cancel the show after our big fight from last episode.  Spenny found something in his basement that made JAD cry.  The two bois discuss adolescence, the skills associated with it, and a 4th-grade basketball play that should have been featured on the local news sports highlights.  Oh, yeah.  I guess we also talk about the movie Bright.  Spenny shares a Typical Day 12 years in th...

Spenny and JAD had a fight and almost quit the Ascension To Ten Podcast.  That’s right, The Fifth Element almost ruined the show and their friendship. Luckily, the bois were able to make up, and JAD apologizes for being so negative.  (His allergies had been really bad that spring, and he barely had a voice, and he was a bit grumpy).  JAD discloses a recent medical diagnosis and has a mild complain...

This was a tough one.  JAD did a full-court dunk on himself and Spenny by assigning Battlefield Earth to review.  We can’t stress enough that this movie should not be watched.  Learn from our pain and suffering and save yourself.  This movie was so bad that the team needed an extra day to release the show.  Ultimately, the bois found enough leverage to get this thing published. JAD and Spenny talk...

The movie Krull is so boring that the bois watched it with one eye closed like a cyclops; which is fitting because it’s (loosely) based on a cyclops’ journey across the universe, staring down his own mortality with the gaze of a thousand fire mares.  It’s kinda weird how a cyclops’ gaze can be more intimidating than that from any two-eyed being, right?  Anyways, all three hosts are finally back fo...

Spenny, Bry, and JAD go back in time so far into the past that they end up in the future.  Or something like that.  That makes about as much sense as this week's movie: The Time Machine.  Join the bois on an adventure so boring that one them decides to have "technical difficulties" just to get out of talking about it.   Spenny discovered something in his house and reads a poem, JAD...

Spenny and JAD need a Benadryl for this one.  The two take a wormhole voyage from Earth only to end up back at Earth, after the Earth became the Earth.  Confused? So were we after watching the movie After Earth.   Spenny also reads a list to JAD, and the Typical Day segment returns. Want to share a Typical Day story with us?  Want to recommend a movie?  Want to add to a previous review?  Please re...

Throw the history books in the trash.  It's actually a common misconception that the great pyramids of Egypt were made by Egyptians.  In fact, the Egyptians just found pyramids that were already built by early hominids.  If this is confusing to you, you're in luck!  Just watch the movie 10,000 BC like Spenny and JAD did.  If you don't have the time, listen to this episode as they re...

Despite a wealth of memories in their storied friendship, neither Spencer nor Jordan can agree on the movie John Carter.  Is this movie worth ending their friendship?  Tune in to find out as the two do an extremely detailed review of this Disney disaster.   This episode was actually recorded prior to Episode 1: A New Pilot, so please forgive the incongruity.  The show lore need not be rewritten.  ...

Spencer, Bryan, and Jordan introduce themselves as the hosts of a new podcast "Ascension To Ten", a rating system for movies and TV shows where a "10" is the best thing you've seen, while an "Ascension" is the worst thing you've seen.  The boys discuss the failed pilot episode and why, despite having a bunch of fancy podcasting equipment, this is actually th...