An Old Timey Podcast

When a dark haired man showed up at the Hotel President one January afternoon in 1935, the hotel staff couldn’t help but take note. He showed up without luggage. He seemed nervous. He said his name was Roland T. Owen and that he was from Los Angeles, but he spoke with a southern accent. At one point, the hotel maid overheard him speak on the phone with a man named Don. She spotted a note he’d writ...

In this final episode of our series on Pocahontas, we see Pocahontas navigate life as a kidnapped young woman. She gets a marriage proposal. She ushers in an era of peace for her people. She gives birth. She’s taken to England. At one point, she tells off that douchelord, John Smith. Her life story presents challenges for historians, not just because Native American oral history conflicts with Eng...

In this episode, tensions rise and true crime abounds. And, like an old timey episode of Dateline, it starts off peachy keen! Pocahontas married a warrior. She had a child. She lived what seemed to be a happy, normal life. But being the favorite daughter of Chief Wahunsenaca put a target on her back. It wasn’t long before English settlers decided to kidnap her. Remember, kids, history hoes always...

Chief Wahunsenaca was in a tough spot. English settlers were camped out nearby, desperate for food but heavily armed. He thought he might bring them under his fold by offering them food and community. To help ensure meetings remained peaceful, he sent his favorite daughter, Pocahontas, as a sign of trust. Over the next year, Pocahontas frequently visited Jamestown. She brought food, taught the set...

When the English popped up on the shore of the “New World,” they were in rough shape. They didn’t have much food, knew next to nothing about their surroundings, and had a boatload of diseases. The English also brought with them an interesting worldview. They figured that Native Americans would be thrilled to: Give them food, work for them, change religions, and one day pay taxes to the King. They...

Over the years, Pocahontas’ life story has become distorted, sensationalized and mythologized. Hell, it even got turned into an exceptionally crappy Disney movie! In this series, Norm separates fact from fiction as he delves into the complicated, fascinating life of Pocahontas. Remember, kids, history hoes always cite their sources! For this episode, Norm pulled from: Custalow, Linwood, and Angela...

Note: Hi friends. We had to say goodbye to our sweet, 17-year-old cat, Boo, this week, so we’re releasing this episode from our Patreon. We’ll be back to our regularly scheduled programming next week. Teri Horton didn’t mince words. The $5 thrift store painting she’d picked up for a friend was ugly. Very ugly. It wasn’t even what she’d call art. It looked like blobs and sprays of paint flung willy...

Frances Perkins wasn’t just the first woman to serve in a presidential cabinet. She was also America’s longest serving Secretary of Labor. The only thing that overshadows her status as a trailblazer is what she accomplished in office. She’s the reason we have Social Security. She led the fight to end child labor, to establish a minimum wage and to create the 40-hour work week. She tried to establi...

Frances Perkins was the first woman to serve in a presidential cabinet. She’s the reason we have Social Security. She led the fight to end child labor, to establish a minimum wage and to create the 40-hour work week. In this episode, we find out how this remarkable woman got her start. Did it help that her birth name was Fanny??? Possibly! Bad names build character! Remember, kids, history hoes al...

Walter Jackson Freeman wanted to do something *big.* As a neurologist for the nation’s largest psychiatric hospital, he saw patients who desperately needed help. But, absent any major medical breakthroughs, Walter was powerless to do much of anything. So he spent years searching for *the thing* that separated people with mental illnesses from the normies. He studied brains. He measured them. He co...

America’s first Olympic games were bad. But just how bad were they??? The 1904 St. Louis Olympics were part of a World’s Fair that featured human zoos, a display of premature babies, a racist athletic event called “Anthropology Days,” and more! The actual Olympic competitions were disorganized and featured mostly American athletes. And for the turd on this poo sundae - a marathon event that almost...

Frenchman Pierre de Coubertin was embarrassed. He had just revived the Ancient Olympic Games on a global scale. But the 1900 Games in his hometown of Paris, France were a disaster. They were a sideshow at the World’s Fair! Many competitors weren’t even aware they were participating in the Olympics! Next time around, Coubertin vowed to find a host nation that would appreciate the Olympics. And that...

Wolfgang von Kempelen was unimpressed. Empress Maria Theresa had invited him to attend a magic show, hoping he’d tell her how the tricks worked. Instead, he told her – and everyone else in her court – that the tricks just plain sucked. He claimed he could do better. Stunned, Maria gave him six months off work to create something that would dazzle her court. So, six months later, Wolfgang von Kempe...

Picture it! 1932. Western Australia. Emus were taking over. They were gobbling up and trampling farmers’ wheat, and in turn, destroying their livelihoods. Something had to be done. So, the Australian government came up with a *novel* solution. They’d arm three members of the Royal Australian Artillery with machine guns. They figured those tall, flightless birds would be easy prey. They were wrong....

Lonnie Johnson was a smart guy — a very smart guy. As a NASA engineer, he spent his days coming up with solutions to complex problems. But when he went home, Lonnie’s brain kept whirring. So, he invented. He tinkered. He imagined. The vast majority of his creations had scientific, practical purposes. But his idea for a pressurized water gun? Well, that was just pure fun. Remember, kids, history ho...

In the finale of our Mount Rushmore series, Mount Rushmore National Memorial gets finished. But the final product isn’t quite what Gutzon Borglum envisioned. The presidents aren’t sculpted down to their waists. There is no entablature. There is no true hall of records. There isn’t a message, written in three languages, in the hope that it’ll one day become Rosetta Stone 2: Electric Boogaloo. And y...

There are so many reasons why Mount Rushmore National Monument *shouldn’t* exist. Right from the start, there was opposition. Environmentalists called the proposed monument a desecration. Native Americans rightly asserted that the Black Hills — and specifically the Six Grandfathers Mountain (aka Mount Rushmore) — was their property. But that didn’t stop Gutzon Borglum, or his circle of high-powere...

Before he set his sights on Mount Rushmore, sculptor Gutzon Borglum had a vision for a massive monument to the Confederacy. He figured that Stone Mountain, located just outside of Atlanta, would be the perfect spot for his magnum opus. The United Daughters of the Confederacy agreed. So did their BFFs, the KKK. For years, the project seemed to be going well. It ended in disaster. Remember, kids, hi...

In this series, we’re talking about something… pretty weird! It’s the fact that, roughly 100 years ago, a handful of people thought it’d be a really good idea to carve four gigantic faces into the side of a mountain. But why did they do it? Whose idea was it?? And finally, they were so busy asking if they could… DID THEY EVEN THINK TO ASK IF THEY SHOULD??? In this episode, we take a look at the ma...

In the History Channel’s “Hunting Hitler,” a group of experts embark on a disingenuous investigation into what became of Adolf Hitler. They consult unreliable witnesses. They make something out of nothing. They cherry pick evidence, and occasionally, they outright lie. Throughout the show, they ignore the forensic evidence, eyewitness accounts, and thorough investigations that showed what we alrea...

Put on your tin foil hats, kids! It’s time for “Hunting Hitler.” In previous episodes of this series, Norm covered Hitler’s final days, his suicide, and the subsequent investigations into his death. But the fine folks from the History Channel’s “Hunting Hitler” program want you to believe that Adolf Hitler truly might have escaped the bunker, unscathed. In this episode, we don our finest tin foil...

Reports of Adolf Hitler’s death filled newspapers around the globe, but was he *really* dead? Like, for real?? Misinformation from the Soviet Union left people all over the world fearing that Hitler might have escaped the bunker. Soon, British and American intelligence stepped in to conduct their own investigations. Over time, the truth emerged. (But Hitler didn’t, because he was super dead.) Reme...

In his final days, Adolf Hitler wallowed in self pity, sent children into war, and held tea parties into the wee hours of the morning. He also threw himself a birthday party. The guest list was a real who’s who of Most Evil Humans! Ultimately, Hitler decided to take his ball and go home. (And by that, we of course mean that he shot himself and went to hell.) Remember, kids, history hoes always cit...

The History Channel’s “Hunting Hitler” poses really stupid, already answered questions about the death of Adolf Hitler. Normie C is having none of it! In this series, Norm will cover Adolf Hitler’s final days, his suicide, and finally, Norm will address the conspiracy theories that Hitler made it out of that bunker alive. In this episode, we learn about Hitler’s smorgasbord of medications, his leg...

As Lucille Ball grew older, she struggled to keep her career going. She got back into movies. She started another sitcom. But critics were cruel. In addition to critiquing her work, they critiqued her – for looking her age. By the mid-80s, she found herself on the receiving end of countless accolades and lifetime achievement awards. But Lucy wasn’t ready to throw in the towel just yet. Remember, k...