A Star to Steer Her By

Everyone is trying to get some on this week's SSHB. First up, both Mister Scott and a colony of disembodied alien spirits have eyes only for Lieutenant Romaine in "The Lights of Zetar." And then Kirk and an immortal battle it out for the love of a robot (while another robot looks on forlorn from the sidelines)in "Requiem for Methuselah." Also this week: alienating any British listeners, alienating...

It's worlds that couldn't be more unalike this episode, but either way Spock is in a mood. First up, Kirk is kidnapped to be the solution to an overpopulation problem while Spock is salty at diplomacy in "The Mark of Gideon." After that, Kirk, McCoy, Sulu, and doomed extra D'Amato are stranded on a rock inhabited only by the specter of its old owner whilst Spock is feeling SUPER pedantic in "That...

We've got a sort-of rehash and a disappointing classic for you on this week's SSHB. First up, things are going wrong at a psychiatric colony again in "Whom Gods Destroy," and then we're treated to all kinds of padding in the unsubtlest allegory of all, "Let That Be Your Last Battlefield." Also this week: space Batman villains, Wayne's world, and codes both secure and unchanging. synopses: 0:45; Wh...

Kirk is picking up the slack for everyone this week, first having to remind some aliens that they've lost touch in "The Empath." After that, he's got to try and play space Henry Higgins when actual space Henry Higgins gets shivved for being a jackass in "Elaan of Troyius." Also this week: Disney songs, sex ed, and a possible lack of underwear. synopses: 0:45; The Empath: 13:52; Elaan of Troyius: 3...

Big content warning right up front with this one: the whole plot of "Plato's Stepchildren" revolves around these superpowered aliens who have the ability to use "Enterprise" crew-folks as their puppets, forcing them into sadistic little acts and games very much against their will. So, yeah. It's uncomfortable, that one. Meanwhile, "Wink of an Eye" is basically a harmless case of "good idea execute...

Your stalwarts have their expectations dashed this week, folks! We positively loved "For the World is Hollow and I Have Touched the Sky," wherein a seemingly-dying Bones McCoy falls for the unwitting Captain of a generation ship. Meanwhile, the oft-lauded "The Tholian Web" bores us to tears as the "Enterprise" crew goes a bit space crazy (again) and McCoy belittles Spock's command ability (again)...

It's gunfights and swordfights this week, as a pair of high-powered aliens muck about with our "Enterprise" stalwarts in very different ways. First up: it's a half-baked old-timey Matrix (maybe) in "Spectre of the Gun," after which a pinwheel of doom makes humans and Vulcans grumpy and Klingons somehow grumpier in "Day of the Dove." Also this week: Sheriff Ames reads you your rights, too much Chek...

Considering how late it is in the series, I don't think they're ever going to learn. It's still free access to all guests and no locked doors anywhere, and what does it get us? First up is the shrillest takeover of the "Enterprise" yet in "And the Children Shall Lead," followed by YET ANOTHER jaunt beyond the galactic barrier in "Is There in Truth No Beauty?" Also this week: Ames has a hat, Caitli...

Everyone's ready to get down with someone this week on SSHB! First up, "Trek" introduces us to our first female ship commander in "The Enterprise Incident," only to undercut its own progressiveness by having her spend most of her screentime being SUPER thirsty for Spock. After that, Kirk winds up with amnesia in "The Paradise Syndrome" and forgets everything about himself except how much he enjoys...

Well, this was certainly a trying week for your erstwhile quartet of "Trek" raconteurs. First up is "Assignment: Earth," wherein alien-trained superspy Gary Seven learns the age-old lesson that some days you just can't get rid of a bomb. But what do you do when the bomb is your episode? And then it's the infamous "Spock's Brain," wherein everyone's favorite Vulcan has his gray matter pinched by al...

It's the SSHB Podcast! It doesn't slice, dice, or julienne fries, but you can certainly set it and listen to it! I can't legally say we're brought to you by RonCo, but we might as well be this episode. It's a week of invention as Doctor Daystrom brings "The Ultimate Computer" around to the Starfleet science fair, and Ames invents a scenario for some "Bread and Circuses" fanfic. Also this week: M5'...

Seems like we've been here before. First up, it looks like the "Enterprise" is getting hijacked AGAIN in "By Any Other Name," while the Prime Directive is being blown to smithereens in "The Omega Glory." Also this week: the show can't decide if humanity is astronaut ice cream or powdered drugs; a disproportionate amount of phallus chat; and the eternal search for the Bubbler of Youth. Content warn...

Plans just keep going wrong this week. But while treachery is the proverbial wooden shoe in the machinery in "Return to Tomorrow," the basic idea itself was just idiotic to begin with in "Patterns of Force." Also this week: Jake makes up names, an unfortunate lesson about forgiveness, and why juxtaposing inhumanity and comedy doesn't work. Timestamps: synopses: 0:35; Return to Tomorrow: 16:18; Pat...

First up: that background noise we mention and apologize for at the start actually cuts out pretty quickly and never returns, so you needn't worry about that, after all. Meanwhile: your valiant podcasting crew struggles to remain on-topic more than usual as we desperately try to care about "The Immunity Syndrome," and try even more desperately to find something to like about "A Private Little War....

Everyone keeps getting captured this week, though by VERY different kinds of enemies; it's full sci-fi weirdness when they're in the clutches of "The Gamesters of Triskelion," and full wackiness when the Sigma Iotians demand "A Piece of The Action" from the "Enterprise" crew! Also this week: going full Shat, bad fights all around, and Kirk does his best Bugs Bunny. Content warning: discussion of a...

We're looking at both ends of the "Trek" tonal spectrum this week! First up: murder and mayhem spanning the centuries in "Wolf in the Fold," followed immediately by lighthearted japes in the classic "The Trouble With Tribbles"! Can we deal with the tonal whiplash?! Of course, we're tonal whiplash personified. Also this week: possession for fun and profit (but mostly homicide); Scotty shouldn't go...

Kirk sure is in a mood this week, but while he has a pretty good excuse in "The Deadly Years," what with crazy space radiation causing him and other members of an away team to rapidly age, he seems to have no excuse in "Obsession," wherein he has been cast as a pseudo-Ahab hunting a white cloud instead of a white whale. Also this week: space feels small, Starfleet officers feel unprepared for shoc...

We've got another week of doubling up! Two DC Fontana scripts bring us two stories driven by mineral rights and featuring two occasions of Kirk being rather rubbish at diplomacy. Luckily, both times he's got someone there that's better at it than him. In "Journey to Babel" it's Sarek, Vulcan ambassador and Spock's father, and in "Friday's Child" it is, remarkably, the usually-irascible Bones actin...

Wait, what's going on?! Well, we've mentioned it a few times before, but we've finally done it: it's our first Ten Forward, where we're going to go anywhere from slightly to VERY off-topic. This week, it's somewhere in the middle as we take a detour into "Star Wars" and its first anthology film, "Rogue One"! SPOILERS GALORE for that one. Seriously, we ruin the ending within 5 minutes. You've been...

Content Warning: even for us, this one gets a bit blue. But it's not our fault! First up we have "I, Mudd," which has the show coming as close to admitting that returning antagonist Harry Mudd has concubine robots that he does strange things with as 1960s TV censors will allow. After that it's "Metamorphosis" and the first appearance of Zephram Cochrane, the human inventor of warp drive, and he's...

"The Doomsday Machine" hits us over the head with an unsubtle Cold War allegory so we hit back with sex toy jokes, and then "Trek" tries its hand at some light Lovecraft in "Catspaw." Also this week: Captains and Commodores; kitty fighting and fighting a cat; and Monkees and monkeys. Timestamps: synopses: 0:27; The Doomsday Machine: 7:35; Catspaw: 34:36

For the first SSHB of 2017 we've got a special guest to introduce us! Kind of. Then it's off to the EEEEEEEEEVIL races in "Mirror, Mirror," before beaming down to the crappest paradise in "The Apple." Also this week: Ladyboners for Bones, the Zune, and Chris repeats a NASA urban legend which he thought was the truth. SSHB: still more accurate than your racist uncle's Facebook posts! Timestamps: sy...

One of the Jims was feeling particularly feisty this week and kept trying to join in, so apologies for the extra ambient noise this episode. Meanwhile, old gods don't die, they just fade away in "Who Mourns for Adonais," and Kirk's deadly-to-machines talking skills are on display again in "The Changeling." Also this week: gift exchange, a retraction, and a visit from both nerdJake and nerdCaitlin....

This episode is particularly SPOCKtacular, when everyone's favorite Vulcan is infected by parasites in "Operation: Annihilate!" and then infected by lust in "Amok Time." Also this week: college posters, continuity, and Vulcan shade. Warning: contains spoilers for "HMS Pinafore." It...it makes sense in context. Timestamps: synopses: 0:58; Operation: Annihilate!: 5:18; Amok Time: 40:29

It's a low and a high as we try desperately to find something to like in "The Alternative Factor," followed by us being shocked that too many cooks DIDN'T spoil the broth in "The City on the Edge of Forever." Also this week: blasphemy, canon consternation, and Aladdin's nipples. Timestamps: synopses: 0:44; The Alternative Factor: 6:10; The City on the Edge of Forever: 30:29