Kaveh Taherian & Hannah Hillam
500 Open Tabs
Each episode, hosts Kaveh Taherian and Hannah Hillam choose one of their countless open browser tabs and finally take the time to read and discuss its contents until they gain enough strength to close that tab once and for all.
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Episodes
25: Kumitab!! (500 Open Stabs) 10.07.2024 1:20:18
In honor of reaching our 25th episode milestone, this week we host the ancient tournament of Kumitab! Join our battle royale as we pit some of our craziest tab subjects against one another including a lobotomized housewife, Richard Nixon, and the burning MacArthur overpass. A listener email informs illustrators to which patron saint they should pray. Listener Tabs: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ti...
24: The 1303 Crown Jewels Heist pt2 and Tanuki balls 03.07.2024 1:34:57
This week we conclude Richard of Pudlicott's 1303 heist of Edward Longshanks' crown jewels and learn about Meiji era political cartoons involving Tanuki balls. A listener email explains the beaverly origins of strawberry flavoring. Episode Tabs: 1303 Heist PART II https://www.forgottenbooks.com/en/download/ChaptersintheAdministrativeHistoryofMediaevalEngland_10193632.pdf Testicular Tanuki Tales: J...
23: Taco Bell Paintings and the 1303 Crown Jewels Heist pt1 26.06.2024 1:28:43
This week we learn about Mark T. Smith's iconic Taco Bell paintings and Richard of Pudlicott's plan to rob Edward Longshanks in 1303. A listener email explains how failing to learn the Persian language resulted in Europeans eating mummies for medicinal purposes. Episode Tabs: One of the most unusual heists in America seems to be unfolding at Taco Bell https://www.sfgate.com/food/article/taco-bell-...
22: The Great Moon Hoax of 1835 pt2 and Colonel Thomas Blood 19.06.2024 1:30:07
This week we conclude the story of the Great Moon Hoax of 1835 and learn about crown jewel thief Colonel Thomas Blood. A listener email explains why ancient Greek statues always had tiny wieners. Episode Tabs: The Great Moon Hoax https://hoaxes.org/archive/permalink/the_great_moon_hoax https://www.newyorker.com/books/page-turner/moon-shot-race-a-hoax-and-the-birth-of-fake-news The Irish Man Who St...
21: 1904 Olympic Marathon and The Great Moon Hoax of 1835 pt1 12.06.2024 1:28:14
This week we learn about the 1904 Olympic marathon and The Great Moon Hoax of 1835. A listener email teaches us how to dance with the devil. Episode Tabs: The 1904 Olympic Marathon May Have Been the Strangest Ever https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-1904-olympic-marathon-may-have-been-the-strangest-ever-14910747/ Belief, Legend, and the Great Moon Hoax https://blogs.loc.gov/folklife/2014/08...
20: Frank Dux, Fata Morganas, and McGruff the Crime Dog 05.06.2024 1:39:52
This week we are joined by special guest Miles Greb ( Plastic Plesiosaur Podcast ) as we learn about Bloodsport's Frank Dux, Fata Morganas, and McGruff the Crime Dog. A listener email reveals a special item on an ancient Greek brothel menu. Go see Kaveh in SF this weekend for his event on June 8th: https://www.booksinc.net/event/lindsay-ellis-books-inc-opera-plaza Episode Tabs: Frank Dux https://e...
19: MacArthur Maze pt 2 and Rose O'Neill 29.05.2024 1:28:22
This week we wrap up the MacArthur Maze debacle and learn about pioneering cartoonist Rose O'Neill. A listener email dives into the mysterious poisoning of a Chinese billionaire. Episode Tabs: Rebuilding The Maze p2 https://youtu.be/-TKjwblp1XI?si=pcAFthBY_vVzV0ss Rose O’Neill : Artist and Suffragist https://www.illustrationhistory.org/artists/rose-oneill Listener Tabs: https://library.osu.edu/sit...
18: Trial of Anne Hutchinson and MacArthur Maze pt 1 22.05.2024 1:25:56
This week we learn about the renegade Anne Hutchinson and how the MacArthur Maze was reconstructed in record time after a fire. A listener email explains the sword-fighting roots of the Best Man. Episode Tabs: The Trial of Anne Hutchinson https://www.famous-trials.com/hutchinson/2395-hutchinson-1637-account Rebuilding The Maze https://www.popularmechanics.com/technology/infrastructure/a60433142/ma...
17: Fake buildings, Sperm Whale Defenses, and Sea Lego 15.05.2024 1:34:16
This week we are joined by special guest Steven Ray Morris ( My Favorite Murder, See Jurassic Right ) as we learn about fake buildings, Sperm whale defense tactics, and Lego lost at sea. A listener email penetrates some myths about lobotomies. Episode Tabs: Fake Buildings https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fake_building Sperm whales survive surprise attack https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-03-21/sperm-w...
16: Jonathan the Tortoise and Air Force One Theft 08.05.2024 1:23:41
This week we learn about Jonathan the Seychelles giant tortoise and Air Force One petty theft. A listener email clarifies what the Grishaverse actually is. Episode Tabs: Jonathan the Tortoise https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/the-worlds-oldest-living-land-animal-a-tortoise-named-jonathan-turns-191-180983392/ The Real D.C. Crime Wave https://www.politico.com/newsletters/west-wing-playbook/2...
15: 1976 Tehran UFO Incident and Crypt of Civilization 01.05.2024 1:41:44
This week we learn about the 1976 Tehran UFO Incident and the father of the modern time capsule. A listener email fetes a disgusting historical figure. Episode Tabs: 1976 Tehran UFO incident http://www.iiaf.net/tehran-dogfight-incident/ The Crypt of Civilization https://www.georgiaencyclopedia.org/articles/history-archaeology/crypt-of-civilization/ Listener Tabs: https://en.m.wikinews.org/wiki/Man...
14: Head Hunter Ants and The Patent Wars 24.04.2024 1:42:06
This week we learn about horrific ant genuses and how the film industry was born out of everyone hating Thomas Edison. A listener email answers the age old question of "how long do pig orgasms last?" Episode Tabs: These ants decorate their homes with the heads of their enemies https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/article/ants-head-hunters-attack-trap-jaw-enemies-nests Thomas Edison: The Unin...
13: Louis Le Prince and The Color Grue 17.04.2024 1:33:45
This week we learn about Louis Le Prince, the REAL inventor of the motion picture camera and the origins of the color Grue. A listener email inspires a high end horse jacket clothing line. Episode Tabs: Who Killed Louis Le Prince? On the forgotten father of film https://harpers.org/archive/2022/04/who-killed-louis-le-prince-on-the-forgotten-father-of-film/ No one could describe the color blue unti...
12: Roar the Movie and Nintendo Power Hotline 10.04.2024 1:41:07
This week we discuss Roar, one of the most unsafe movies ever made and the Nintendo Power Hotline. A listener email reveals all the animals in elected office. Episode Tabs: Hollywood's real Tiger King: Insane big cat movie Roar getting VOD rerelease https://ew.com/movies/roar-movie-vod/ Inside The Nintendo Power Hotline https://www.gameinformer.com/2022/02/22/inside-the-nintendo-power-...
11: Michelin Man and An Arab among the Vikings 03.04.2024 1:33:47
This week we discuss the origins of the Michelin Man and a first hand account of Vikings from 922. A listener email answers the question of why we don't see Pandas in toilet paper ads. Episode Tabs: Allied Forces on D-Day Used a Popular Tourist Guide to Help Liberate France https://www.military.com/history/allied-forces-d-day-used-popular-tourist-guide-help-liberate-france.html “The Rus” (An Arab...
10: Aconcagua Murder Mystery, March 27th, and Golf Course Sharks 27.03.2024 1:16:30
This week we have our first ever special guest, 500 Tabs' very own editor and friend Alyssa Cooper! We discuss a mountain murder mystery, the importance of March 27th, and sharks on a golf course. A listener email taps into some of our most primal fears. Episode Tabs: Ghosts on the Glacier https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2023/12/09/world/americas/aconcagua-mountain-expedition-photos.html The W...
9: Lobotomies and Nikola Jokic 20.03.2024 1:39:44
This week we discuss insane mental health practices of the 1940s and the NBA's golden horse, Nikola Jokić. A listener email disgusts Kaveh. Episode Tabs: Mother’s Little Helper: Vintage Drug Ads https://www.goretro.com/2014/08/mothers-little-helper-vintage-drug-ads.html How Nikola Jokić Became The World’s Best Basketball Player https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2024/02/12/how-nikola-jokic-became-...
8: Trial of the Werewolf Peter Stump and Folk Etymology 13.03.2024 1:23:11
This week we discuss the trial of alleged werewolf Peter Stump and folk etymology. A listener email reveals how McDonalds tried to buy their way into fandom. Episode Tabs: Confessions of a Werewolf: The Trial of Peter Stump https://www.nationalgeographic.com/history/history-magazine/article/a-german-werewolfs-confessions-horrified-1500s-europe What the Folk? https://daily.jstor.org/what-the-folk-t...
7: Terminal Dwellers and Panda Diplomacy 06.03.2024 1:32:39
This week we discuss people who live at airports and panda diplomacy. A listener email reveals how rabbits frankly don't give a damn. Episode Tabs: Terminal Dwellers https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_people_who_have_lived_in_airports A Chinese cigarette tin launched D.C.’s 50-year love affair with pandas https://www.washingtonpost.com/history/2022/03/16/pandas-china-nixon-dc/ Listener Tabs:...
6: Johnstown Flood pt 2 and The Letter Thorn Þ 21.02.2024 1:38:44
This week Kaveh concludes the Katamari style horrors of the Johnstown flood and Hannah shares how the Europeans had their own American Idol but for letters of the alphabet instead of singers. A listener email reveals if a childhood memory was in fact cake, and how it exploded. Correction: the Phoenician alphabet comes after the Proto-Sinaitic script and before the Greek alphabet Episode Tabs...
5: The Niihau Incident and Johnstown Flood pt 1 07.02.2024 1:30:36
This week we return to Niʻihau for an insane adventure that followed the bombing of Pearl Harbor and learn about the Johnstown Flood and how dams are just like us and also like candy. A listener email finally puts the debate about white chocolate to rest. Episode Tabs: The Niihau Incident https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Niihau_incident This Dam Break Was One of the Worst Man Made Disaste...
4: Ni’ihau Island and Jesus in Japan 24.01.2024 1:16:11
This week we discuss a forbidden Hawaiian island and Jesus's definitely legitimate final resting place in northern Japan. Also a listener clues us into the little discussed Eternal Riverdale phenomenon. Episode Tabs: Ni’ihau Island https://allthatsinteresting.com/niihau The Little-Known Legend of Jesus in Japan https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-little-known-legend-of-jesus-in-japan-165354...
1: Mafia Mozzarella and Hobby Tunneling 10.01.2024 1:08:23
Our inaugural episode! Join us as we talk about the Mob’s influence on pizza and the addicting nature of Hobby Tunneling. Plus, some crabulous listener mail. Episode Tabs: How the Italian Mob Changed Pizza Forever https://thedigestonline.com/dining/how-the-italian-mob-changed-pizza-forever/ Hobby Tunneling https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hobby_tunneling Listener Tabs: https://everything2.com...
2: Phossy Jaw and Exploding Whales 10.01.2024 1:05:18
On this stomach-churning episode, we blast into the rotting, juicy worlds of Phossy Jaw and Exploding Whales. Episode Tabs: Phossy Jaw https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phossy_jaw How do you get rid of a beached whale before it explodes? https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2023/nov/17/how-do-you-get-rid-of-a-beached-whale-before-it-explodes Listener Tabs: https://punchdrink.com/articles/tiki-bar-d...
3: Catfish CEO and Princess Caraboo 10.01.2024 1:10:41
On today's episode, third time’s the charm as we talk about liars and impostors from Victorian England to modern day crypto scammers. The centuries may change but the hustle never does. Episode Tabs: Crypto hedge fund CEO may not exist; probe finds no record of identity https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2024/01/crypto-hedge-fund-ceo-may-not-exist-probe-finds-no-record-of-identity/ Princess Carab...
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