The Dildorks

Play parties are so fun, but also confusing and scary at times! This week we’re demystifying the processes of finding play parties to attend, mentally preparing yourself to play, and putting together your party outfit.   Sex or No Sex? | Finding Parties | Vetting | Not Kinky? | Alone vs. With People | Mental Prep | Logistics | Dress Codes Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Addison Finch Become...

This week we’re answering some of your big kink questions, including how to keep things casual in a kinky friendship-with-benefits and what to do when a top safewords!   Pervy Purview | D/s FWB | Slut Protocols | Hobbies | IRL Fanfiction | Aftercare | Sub Drop | Giving Feedback | Tops Safewording Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Addison Finch Become a patron to support the show and get acces...

Let’s be cool and heat things up: this week we’re discussing temperature play! Weather | Sensation Play | Easy vs. Advanced | Ice | Topping | Risks | Wax | Toys | Enemas | Lube & Oil | Emotions | Safewording Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Addison Finch Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show. &nb...

What skills do bottoms develop that allow them to take more sensation, feel good about doing so, and make their tops happy? This week’s episode is all about bottoming skills, which are sometimes underacknowledged in the kink world.   iTunes Reviews | Switching | Subbing vs. Bottoming | Bottoming Skills Workshop | Underrecognized | Masochism | Subspace | What You Want | Negotiation | Providing Data...

Vulvas and vaginas are great! This week we’re discussing our feelings about these widely venerated and vilified parts – both our own and other people’s.   Vulva Collector | Our Own Bits | Vag vs. Dick | Queer Impostor Syndrome | Transferrable Skills | Sucking Clits | “Switching” Genders | More Complicated | Visual Representation | Vag Smells | Tightness | Aesthetics | Semantics | Sex Ed | Stigma &...

Happy New Year! This week we’re reviewing how our sex lives progressed in 2019, and looking forward to discuss our 2020 sex goals. You’re Wrong About | Overall Trends | Sex Ed | Decentering Sex | Bad Sex | Keeping Track | Number of Partners | Locations | Best Sex | Roleplay | Phone Sex | Topping | Hypno-Topping | Sex Toys | Sex Media | Last Year’s Goals | Passion Projects | Apologies | Submitting...

We’re back to chat more about taboo kinks! Hear us unpack incest porn, edgy ethnoreligious roleplays, forced feminization, and more.   Relativity | Legislation | Incest Porn | Context | Trauma | Fantasy vs. Reality | Spicing Things Up | Uncool | Beducated Female Orgasm Course | Race Play | Hate Crimes | Motivations | Forced Feminization | Limits | Bringing It Up Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork...

This week we’re talkin’ taboos! Hear us discuss some of our favorite taboo kinks, like intoxication, consensual non-consent, and sleepy sex. More to come next week!   Toybag Guide to Playing With Taboo | What Is Taboo? | Vanilla Taboos | Fantasy vs. Reality | Gateway Kinks | Blood | Jillian Keenan | Consensual Non-Consent | Aftercare Buddy | “Slave” | Triggers | Check-Ins | Intoxication | Beducate...

Almost everyone’s curious about hypnosis, so we’re back this week doing Hypno 101! Learn about how trance works, what it feels like, and what kinky stuff you can do with it.   Mind Play | Scripts | Pre-Talk | Negotiation | Speaking in Trance | Children | Surprises | Vetting Tops | Inductions | Relaxation | Fixation | Resisting | Confusion | Covert Hypnosis | Rapid Inductions | Coercion | Derren Br...

We attended a hypnokink event together recently so this week we decided to chat about erotic hypnosis! Hear about our fantasies surrounding this kink, some scenes Kate has done, and some hypnosis misconceptions we love to debunk.   TES Hypnokink Group | Distractions | Validity | Tricks | Orgasm Countdown | Lazy Tops | Mindlessness | Perception vs. Reality | Metaphor | Relaxing | Risks | Two Hyp Ch...

This week Bex sits down with Rachael Rose , a chronically ill and disabled sex educator, to talk about their shared diagnosis: ADHD! Find out how this condition intersects with sex, dating, creativity, and more. Diagnosis | ADHD Brain | Getting Things Done | Homework | Brain Engagement | Watching Movies | Gender Bias | Restlessness | Gamification | Time Blindness | Reaching Out | Notifications | R...

This week we’re tackling the sex and kink elements of long-distance relationships! Tune in to hear our best Skype sex tips, how protocol works in LDRs, and whether we would have sex on an airplane.   Mile-High Club | Skype Sex | Feeling Silly | Flirting & Foreplay | “Real Sex” | Accessibility | Protocol | Sadomasochism | We-Vibe Sync | Aftercare | Protocol Changes | Shopping | Research Tasks | Col...

We’ve both been in multiple long-distance relationships, so today we’re discussing the weird, wonderful, and sometimes wistful realities of LDRs! What Counts? | Initial Opinions | Because Internet | Day-to-Day | Unreality | Chemistry | Communication Style | Touch | Dates | Finances | Endgame | Polyamory | Balance | Traits | Soulmates | Asking | Important Conversations | Time Management | Emotional...

Bex is back from the hospital after his top surgery! This week he’s telling us the story of his experience (with some contributions from Kate, who was there too).   Current Status | Early Morning | Preparation | Money | Dad | Lip Ring | Anaesthesiologist | Sharpie | Joking/Coping | Misgendering | Peeing | Aromatherapy | Sex Break | Hot Nurse | Graham Crackers | Elevator | Pain | Marvel | Partners...

We sat down with therapist and educator Aida Manduley to discuss the psychological model known as attachment theory – how it works, why it matters, and (of course) how it relates to non-monogamy and kink!   What Is Attachment Theory? | Insecure | Secure | Anxious-Preoccupied | Dismissive-Avoidant | Fearful-Avoidant | Caveats | Childhood | Abuse | What to Work On | Distress Tolerance | Different Ma...

In preparation for Bex’s long-awaited top surgery, we had a conversation about his reasons for getting it, what he’s been doing to get ready for it, and what he thinks will happen during recovery and beyond.   Time Travel | Rude Questions | What Is It? | Deciding | Process | Risks | Fears | Pain | Recovery | Depression | Regrets | Saying Goodbye | Chest Hair | Looking Forward | Sex | Friends & Par...

This week rounds out our 3-part series on breakups! We’re addressing some awkward post-split situations, like reclaiming your possessions, saying goodbye to your ex’s family, and dealing with passive-aggressive tweetstorms.   Getting Back Your Stuff | Impulsive Breakups | Taking a Break | Close Quarters | New Dates | Harping On | Friends & Family | Subtweets Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by...

We had more to say about breakups, so here’s another episode about the ends of relationships! Grammar/Gender Rebel | Rebounds | Staying Friends | Small Talk | Best Breakup | Pre-Negotiation | Friend Breakups | Poly Breakups | Supporting Partners | D/s Breakups Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Addison Finch Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bon...

How did it take us this long to do an episode about breakups? This week we’re discussing some of our worst splits, how we think they should be done, and what should happen afterward. Which One Is Harder? | First Breakup | Text vs. In Person | Long-Distance | Teenage Bullshit | When Is It Time? | Downleveling | Clarity | Reasons | Safety | Location | Post-Breakup Conversations | Getting Better | Un...

This week we’re interviewing Dr. Liz Powell , psychologist, speaker, and author of our favorite book on non-monogamy, Building Open Relationships . We touch on polyamory struggles, love as a verb, and creating the relationships you want, among other things!   Building Open Relationships | Jealousy | Desire-Based Approach | Breaking Up | Downleveling | Hierarchy | Flexibility | Boundaries | Perfect...

Truth or dare? We DARE you to join us this week for a discussion of sex games: different types, ways to play them, and why they might be beneficial. Travel Exhaustion | Why? | Mass Market Games | Excuses | Dulcinea Pitagora | Competition | Game Development | Strip Scrabble | Video Games | Roleplay | Reward vs. Punishment | Consent | Sex Dice | Truth or Dare | Intoxicants | Who Would You Fuck? | Ga...

This week Bex interviews his friend and roommate, sex educator and queer pirate Jo Goforth, about finding identity through fandom, positive representations of masculinity, and their new sex ed comic, among other things. Coworker Chart | Union-Busting | Fandom | A Song of Ice and Fire | X-Men | Black Sails | Resonant Characters | Quicksilver | Cosplay | Musketeers | Jake Peralta | Positive Masculin...

We’re back to smash more romantic myths this week! Hear our takes on unconditional love, jealousy, internet relationships, and more. Femme Multitasking | Someone For Everyone | Commitment | Love Conquers All | Unconditional Love | Who’s the Man? | Center of Your Universe | Obsessed | Online Relationships | Jealousy | Political Views | Cheaters | Bodily Functions | Sharing a Bed | Dressing Up | Lea...

There’s so much bullshit discourse about dating and relationships out there, so this week we’re busting romantic myths! Hear us debate first-date protocols, compatibility adages, gender stereotypes, and more. I Love You | 3rd Date | 3 Days | Hard to Get | Preserving the Mystery | Attachment Style | The First Move | Who Pays? | Mentioning Exes | Opposites Attract | Conflict | Love at First Sight |...

Kate recently came out as demisexual, so this week we’re discussing that identity: what does it mean, how does it manifest, and how does it relate to other concepts like sluttiness, responsive desire, and demiromanticism? Definitions | Romantic vs. Sexual | Identities | Oppression & Invisibility | Sex Industry | Attraction or Lack Thereof | Demiromantic | External Factors | A New Development |...