Bottle Crow Reborn

There are two types of people: the broken bones and the wet noodles. Which one are you? No, don't answer that: we'll answer it FOR you. Over the course of this revelatory, revoLUTIONary podcast, you will learn all sorts of things. About slugbugs or whatever. About relationships. Plumbing. Vietnamese fast food. Bottle Crow: Just Do It. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe o...

Music rings across the streets of Garlemald, and Professor Sirus nan Siles tries desperately to run faster. He knows that sound too well. For many a Garlean commander, leader of black ops projects or dark science experiment, that music has been the last thing they ever heard. It heralds the coming of the golden avenger, clad in armor and bearing a lance whose tip has never failed to pierce the hea...

After losing a recording, we're back with a vengeance. Certainly, this episode feels like vengeance: like Nick punishing me, Six, for slights real or imaginary. Air Bud, Taco Bell, Subway, Immortal 2s, League of Legumes, SingSingSing with a real banger, Home Improvements, the whole works. Jump in. This is the abridged version of the episode: the extremely lengthy discussion of Air Bud has been con...

After losing a recording, we're back with a vengeance. Certainly, this episode feels like vengeance: like Nick punishing me, Six, for slights real or imaginary. Air Bud, Taco Bell, Subway, Immortal 2s, League of Legumes, SingSingSing with a real banger, Home Improvements, the whole works. Jump in. This is the unabridged version of the episode: it has been edited like all Bottle Crow eps, but not T...

SingSingSing graces us with another tune in this extra long episode. The Tragedy of the Missing Triplelupa, angering pub players with humility, a return to Old Dota, fried tofu tricks, we fix baseball, and so much more. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on those, and leave a review if you like! That would really help us out. Tell your Dota friends about us, help spread...

This week is our first ever SPONSORED segment! It's sponsored... by a listener... in exchange for battle pass levels. Listen, if you're gonna help me get the Windranger arcana in exchange for content I was gonna make ANYWAY, I'm HERE for it. So shoutouts to Greg Scherr for his support. Taco Bell, Pringles, Dota (what the hell is that?), baseball, and more. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitche...

Oh no, gang. We're in trouble. The Battle Pass is here, and it's really cool... and REALLY expensive. There sure are a lot of pieces of random nonsense in it, though. We invent a few new segments, we discover the truth of Windranger's origins, we offer another poem via Jacky Mao. Weep for me, children, this year will be a costly one for me. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subsc...

Just when you think you're out, someone insults Windranger. And you know what you have to do. There's a new Hoho Haha for a new generation, and Nick's jungle boycott has met with great success. A poem, some truly smashing potatoes, and an International cancellation. Well, there's always next year. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on those, and leave a review if you lik...

I know. I know. You haven't eaten since our last Jacky's Chow. How could you? Without the culinary guidance of Nick and Six, all the world's food is but dust. But your worries are over. With this hour of guidance, we will set you back on the path. May your quarantine be full of cooking adventures. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on those, and leave a review if you lik...

My favorite frosty friend. How are you? I know I haven't checked in lately. I could say I've been busy, and that would be true. I most certainly have. But... I could have made time. We both know that. This relationship... is not working. Please, don't get upset. It's not me, it's you. It's the neutral item thing. I'm going to be honest, friend: it sucks. It is not fun. It makes me not want to play...

What starts off with a tasting of six energy drinks only goes downhill from there. Well... at least it doesn't go UPHILL. Energy drink tasting is pretty far down already, I shouldn't make claims I can't take back. A great instant pot kakuni recipe, the Kraft Dinner Enhancement Program, and red sauce mistakes. We feastin', y'all. Get in here. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subs...

Drink deep, ye souls of war, there is taurine enough for all. Where Pepsi Max dares not, where Nahaz fears, that is where we are headed. For Frostivus beckons, and none may refuse the call. Fried egg arcana, laptop destruction, the holiday spirit has us in its thrall. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on those, and leave a review if you like! That would really help us o...

He looked down at his hands. Blood. So much blood. Techies was dead. Medusa? Erased. Supports as a whole were already beginning to disappear. IceFrog laughed. "Is this the cost?" he asked. No one answered: there was no one left. "So be it," he continued, ranting at the empty air. "I pay this price gladly, if it will bring back my beloved." He stared at the love of his life, even as Void Spirit's o...

You thought 7.23 was gonna rock your world? How about a three hour patch note special with the Bottles Crow? Plus a Jacky's Chow and a Home Improvements of Newerth! And EVEN a new SingSingSing song! Truly, you are blessed. No, no, there's no need to thank us. Just, convince Valve to let Impetus pierce BKB again. That's reward enough. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on...

Oh no, folks. We've done it again. We've come up with an idea that Valve will steal.. and this one isn't a fun balance patch, it's a monetization scheme. Well, at least there are lots of other things to talk about. Ranked calibration! Midas Mode 2! Mr. Midas's father?! Rice cookers! Rats in the fireplace! It gets a bit wild. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on those, a...

It's a Jacky's Chow! We have a guest! We have a new hero concept! I can't stop ending sentences in exclamation points! Whew, I think I fixed it. Please welcome Allen to the show for their (and Nick's) first time having Taco Bell... that they can remember, anyway. There's Home Improvement talk, Business Dave is here to fight, and... uh well that's it because we talked about Taco Bell for a long tim...

The International is in the rear view mirror, and in its wake, Six has finally started playing Dota again. Nick's squeezed in a few games inbetween hours on end of home improvement, Counter-Strike has nothing on the ancient board game of Go, and Jacky's Chow is all about instant pot cooking, pros and cons. Hey folks: don't saw your couch in half. But if you do, tell us about it. Pictures please. W...

This episode, we're all about growing up. Nick's doing upgrades on the house (?) that he owns (???), Slacks's sense of humor has evolved, and Anti-Mage is all grown up and their safelane support single parent can finally let go. Alllll the TI hats reviewed, why does anyone like Dota Underlords, Straw-Ber-Ita's glorious return, and Beef Wellington. Rejoice, Bottle Crowd: this one's for you. We’re o...

Welcome back to the stage of history. ...That's what I call these podcasts notes. Hey folks, it's been a while! But while Bottle Crow has slumbered, much has been brewing in the world of Dota. A new hero! Aghs for everyone! Dota Auto Chess... official? All this, plus Jacky's Chow, and so much more. Hey again. It's good to be here. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on th...

Oh gosh, I'm just realizing the can I've opened. By starting having episodes be separately labeled as "Jacky's Chow" I've now permanently screwed up my episode numbering. Oh no, oh jeez. Well. Nothing else for it, I suppose. Episode 119, aka Episode 118, is here. We glean True Sight on the events of the last International, tsk tsk at the subpar New Bloom, wish Maybe a happy marriage, sigh over the...

Hey hi hello! Sorry to make this weird, but you see up there how it doesn’t say “Episode?” It says “Jacky’s Chow?” Well, it’s still an episode of Bottle Crow, you still get your Dota talk in there, but from now on, if it opens with food talk, and it’s more food talk than Dota talk, we’re gonna label it as an episode of Jacky’s Chow! Thank...

[The following is an excerpt from “Chemical Disturbances Through the Ages” by Prof. M. Midas.] …So clearly, there is a distinction between being “poisonous” and being “toxic.” However, the two can also seem very similar at an initial assessment. If one takes at face value the claims of Bell Biv DeVoe’s “Poison” and Brittney Spears’s...

As your carry blames Magnus for another defeat, as boosters take MMR through immoral feat, there’s a companion that will be there for you, times good and bad: Bottle Crow Reborn, with Six Dettmar and that Nick lad. Sometimes you celebrate the joys of the game, others you can’t help but curse its name. Whatever your mood, or how hard you try, this episode we argue about mixing hot and c...

What does it mean to “steal” a spell? After all, when Rubick steals a spell, it’s not like the original caster loses anything. You wouldn’t steal a CAR. Don’t steal a SPELL. Is that it? It’s like online piracy? And in that case… is it like reposting someone else’s art, or is it like torrenting a movie? Are spells copyrighted? Can you sue over spell t...

A whisper on the wind, a voice in the shadow. Love is in the air, and it carries a dagger for the unsuspecting. For The Boys? No. The Boys are dead, and there are no tears. Sometimes to make something beautiful and new, you have to tear down the old. And so say it firmly, say it with belief in its righteousness and glory: “For the Girl.” It feels strange in your mouth, does it not? Fea...