An Evolving Man Podcast

On Saturday last weekend I went back to the site of my childhood trauma. I went back to my boarding school. It was the first time that I have been back inside the school for 25 years. Today I offer some reflections for how it was. How did I find it? Was it really hard? Or was it harder than I was expecting? I talk about visiting the dining hall, the chapel, the site of the death of my friend, and...

 Trish Brennan is the CEO & Principal Trainer of Leading Edge Communication. She coaches women who want to have more confidence in their relationships, be more assertive, establish healthy boundaries and radically improve the quality of their lives through enhanced communication and relationship skills. She is also the author of The Straight Talk. I would love for you to share some of your jou...

 Last weekend I returned to London again.  While I was there I found myself walking past, by synchronicity, my old workplace.  So I recorded these films...  I went past old pubs I used to drink in, the office I worked in and the realisation of just how close my old workplace was to the original site of my boarding school.  I also had the insight that being in the City, the financial sector, was ve...

What are the 3 types of trauma? T Today I talk about attachment trauma. This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma.  Last week I talked about developmental trauma https://youtu.be/ilTX9M0KExk and the week before that I talked about shock trauma https://youtu.be/xE7EOR_F_qE.  This week I am talking about attachment trauma. What is it?  I give some...

 What are the 3 types of trauma?  Today I talk about developmental trauma.  This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma.  Last week I talked about shock trauma.  This week I am talking about developmental trauma. What is it?  I give some examples of what this type of trauma is and I also quote some of the words of Nick Duffell and Thurstine Basset...

Today I have a fascinating conversation with Shahid Van Helden talking about tantra, sex, porn addiction and intimacy. He also talks about presence and the three things that we need to do as men to become more present. He also share some ideas for how we improve our love-making and our sex lives. A really fascinating conversation. --- Shahid Van Helden is a men's group, men's & coupl...

 What are the 3 types of trauma?  Today I talk about the most well know type trauma.  This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma.  The first one is shock trauma.  What is shock trauma?  I give some examples of what shock trauma is and I also quote some of the words of Bessel Van der Kolk from The Body Keeps the Score and Peter Levine from his boo...

“Our vulnerability is our superpower.” These words come from the co-director and executive producer of one of my favourite films, 'The Work'. The Work is one of the most powerful films I have come across. It has me in tears every time. What is it? The journey of three men visiting Folsom Prison to attend a four day men's retreat. What unfolds is so beautiful. Grown men in tears. Som...

Today I wanted to talk about a subject which is very close to my heart - that of mental health and especially with regards to teenagers.  As a teenager in boarding school I really struggled with my mental health.  I was suicidal and at the age of 14 one of my friends at boarding school committed suicide.  It devastated me although I never dared shared my emotion with anyone. That was not allow in...

Jai Singh is a men's coach and workshop leader who specialises in helping fathers find a deeper sense of purpose in their lives. He also runs a 10 week program for fathers, called The New King. Some of the areas to cover:  I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do? What are some of the challenges that men face as fathers in today's...

Anabel Gonzalez, M. D., Ph. D. works as a psychiatrist and psychotherapist in the Public Mental Health System. She coordinates the Trauma and Dissociation Program in the Severe Mental Disorders Services of the University Hospital of A Coruña, and has a broad clinical experience with Dissociative Disorders and Complex Trauma.  Trained in different psychotherapeutic approaches, she has been working...

"Boarding Schools Are Traumatic & Dangerous for Most Children" Today I am speaking with Joss Goulden who is trained in psychology and is a parenting coach. She also went to boarding school for 10 years. Here she talks about why she feels that boarding schools are not safe places to bring up children. How boarding schools create trauma in our young people rather than helping them to f...

What is heart-led leadership? What are men's circles and men's group and why are they so helpful? What can we do for men's mental health at the moment?  Today I am speaking with Peter Eugène Bennett. Peter is a men's coach who also works with the Sons of Zion and the Sacred Sons.  He has trained in Vipassana Meditation, Wim Hof, Nutritional Therapy, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, Qigong,...

What is mindfulness? What is the path to happiness? How do we overcome addictions using mindfulness? And what are some of the key teachings of Buddhism? Today I am speaking with Buddhist psychologist and best-selling author, Thomas Bien, PhD in a fascinating conversation about happiness, mindfulness and recovery from trauma and addictions. Dr Bien has lectured around the world and spent time with...

On today's podcast we go deep into working with the archetypes. How do we move from the Hero's Journey, more for the transition from boyhood/ girlhood to early manhood/ womanhood to the Sovereign's Journey, for the maturing adult? What are the ways that we can work with the archetypes? How do we bring our inner King and Queen online, also known as the Sovereign? A really fascinating...

What does one of the UK leading lawyers into child sexual abuse think about IICSA (Independent Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse)?  What does he feel about mandatory reporting? (At the moment there is no law that states that schools or organisations need to report child sexual abuse).  What does he feel? Is this right? What needs to be done?  And what about cases like Jimmy Saville, Bishop Peter Bal...

What makes a contented couple? Are there certain keys to having a thriving and loving intimate relationship? What if you didn't have a happy childhood? Can you still have a fulfilling and happy relationship? Today I am speaking with Annie Power who is a couple counsellor and author. We talk about attachment theory and how that relates to relationships. How important is it to be a securely att...

On today's episode my guest is Rosemary Lamaison. In this podcast she shares her years of experience working as a counsellor with ex-boarders. What are some of the experiences of girls and boys at boarding school? Today Rosemary gives dozens of quotes and examples of how the boarding school education impacts girls and boys and the adults that they become. A really fascinating and rich sharing...

In this episode I am talking with leading clinical psychologist and author, Paul DeBlassie III. Paul has worked in the field of psychology for 30 years plus and has mainly specialised in working with religious abuse and trauma . He is also the bestselling author of several books including: Goddess of Everything, Goddess of The Wild Thing, and The Unholy. I really enjoyed this conversation and love...

Today I am speaking with two experts in the field of energy psychology. There are different forms of energy psychology from Psych-K to EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) and from Holographic Repatterning to Matrix Reimprinting.  As Bruce Lipton PhD writes: "Energy psychology can induce radical changes in behaviour within minutes and in many cases, these changes produce permanent alterations i...

On the podcast today to celebrate the 50th episode I have a very special guest, Michelle Dawn Silcox.  I have often been asked to talk about boarding school syndrome and relationships.  Well, today I thought that I would get one of the experts in this field, my wife!  Michelle is a relationship counsellor and has been interested in psychology and wellness for many decades.  Today she shares some o...

Dr Helen Roche talks in this episode about education in the Third Reich and specifically the Nazi boarding schools, the Napolas. Very little has been shared about what went on in the education of the elite Nazi children until Dr Roche's book. Today we talk about the history and the timeline of these schools and some of the links to the Spartan philosophies and British boarding schools. --- Dr...

What does trauma have to do with our current global challenges? Is there a link between trauma and the difficulties that we currently face? Today I speak with Matthew Green who is a climate journalist with an interest in collective trauma healing. How do we heal? Matthew Green is a former Reuters climate and Financial Times correspondent and has reported from more than 30 countries.  He is now glo...

What is the history and global impact of boarding schools? Often on the podcast we have talked about the British boarding schools. Today we are starting to venture further afield. In speaking with Petter Sandgren, who is Professor at the University of Stockholm, we start to explore the history of boarding schools and what the impact is of boarding school on the world. What is the difference betwee...

Today on the podcast we are talking about leadership, trauma, boarding school and how we heal. I am delighted to be talking with Martin Lloyd-Elliott who is one of the UK's leading psychologists and psychotherapists who specialises in working with leaders. Here he talks about what trauma is. He then goes on to talk about leadership and especially political leadership. What makes a great leade...