The Dildorks

We’re discussing safewords again this week, including how to know when to safeword, how to safeword if you tend to go non-verbal during scenes, and how doms and tops can safeword too.   Going Nonverbal | People-Pleasing | When Safewording is the Point | Mollena’s Story | Are Safewords Enough? | Post-Scene Conversations | Should I Safeword? | Doms & Tops Safewording Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artw...

Safewords are an important tool for many kinksters, so this week we’re discussing what safewords are, when they’re useful, and some tips on how to use them well.   Consensual Non-Consent | What is a Safeword? | Stoplight System | Custom Colors | Beige & Green | Playing Without a Safeword | Genuine Distress Method | “Misusing” Safewords | “Ruining the Fun” | What Happens Next? Credits: Music by PRO...

Sure, we’re pretty sexual people, but are we social? This week we’re discussing our current thoughts on, and strategies for, socializing while the pandemic is still ongoing.   Things We Like | Spending Time Alone | Higher Standards | Keeping Conversations Going | Our Struggles | Flirting | How to Reach Out | Real-Time vs. Asynchronous | People Who Aren’t Online Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork...

This week we’re discussing some more new-ish additions to the sex/kink lexicon, some of which we like and some of which we find baffling.   Prejac | Infinity Baby | /r/prejac | Breeding, Breedable, Breeders | Situationship | Hit, Smash | Sniper Position Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Addison Finch Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus epis...

This week, your two millennial cohosts debate and discuss the definitions of various sex/kink terms popularized by Gen Z.   Feeling Old | Gooning | Simping | Gentle Femdom | Gatekeeping “Kinky” | Pleasure Dom | Girlcock, Boypussy, Etc. | Ghost Penis & Phantom Limbs Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Addison Finch Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthl...

Billy just got back from kink camp ( Dark Odyssey Fusion ) as well as TES Fest , and this week he tells us about what it was like to do both of those kink events back-to-back.   Justin McElroy on Gender Reveal | Operations Team | Comparing the Two Events | Space vs. Crowds | Bad Weather | Goals | Emotions | “I’m Working!” | Scenes | Lego Paddle | Communication Skills Credits: Music by PROTODOME Ar...

In light of Elon Musk recently declaring “cis” to be a slur on Twitter (it’s not), this week Kate is interviewed by her spouse mb about what it means to be cis and how her gender presentation has shifted over time.   Cis Isn’t a Slur | Queer Femme Cis Woman | Getting Misgendered | My New Gender Workbook | Boyish Presentation | Cis-Het Male Gaze | Black Leather Chucks | Gender Census | Queer as a G...

This week Kate chats with pro financial dominatrix and kinky comedian Lane Kwederis about findom and her one-woman show, Sex Job !   Findom Beginnings | Improv & Theatre | Educating Clients | What Findom Involves | Financial Limitations | What’s Hot About It? | “Mesmerize” | Balancing Professional Identities | Fantasy vs. Reality | Shadow Side | Personal Growth | “Did I Do That For Money?” Credits...

Crying can be hot, challenging, painful, cathartic, pleasurable, or all of the above. This week we’re talking about our current relationship to crying, in and out of scenes.   Crying Daily | Surprise | Making Yourself Cry | A Good Feeling | Fetishizing It | Seeing Others Cry | Gender & Hormones | Childhood Experiences | Looking in the Mirror | Emotions for Emotions’ Sake | Aftercare | Crying on th...

Continuing our discussion of brats, “bad” subs, and “good” subs, this week we talk about how rebellion, humor, and colorful language can be worked into D/s scenes, among other things.   “Is That an Order?” | Responses to “Make Me” | Bratty Doms | Humor & Laughter | Fun with Language | Finding Non-Bratty Subs | Punishment Concerns | Disrespectful Honorifics Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Ad...

Some submissives like to be “good,” some like to be “bad,” some like to be “bratty,” and some prefer a combination or like to mix things up. This week we discuss the motivations and manifestations of these various orientations to submission.   Good vs. Bad vs. Bratty | Psychological Motivations | Emotional Masochism & Humiliation | Childhood Experiences | What Do We Prefer? | “Disrespectful” Brats...

This week Billy is interviewed by his boyfriend Dee Darkholme about “free use” kink, a type of consensual non-consent… while planning a free use scene they’re gonna do after the recording!   Definition | What’s Hot About It? | Hedonism | Negotiation | Activities Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Addison Finch Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly b...

Happy Masturbation Month! This week we’re talking about our ever-evolving relationships to masturbation and how it all relates to self-love, self-compassion, and living a good life.   Our Solo-Sex History | Truly Solo Masturbation | Neurochemical Effects | Goal-Oriented | A “Waste of Time”? | Flirty Sexy Energy | Time Off to Recharge | Doing Stuff for Content | “Assisted” Masturbation Credits: Mus...

This week we’re (belatedly) celebrating Mother’s Day by talking about mommy kink – plus a decent amount of daddy kink thrown in for good measure.   Succession Fanfiction | Humiliation & Meanness | Nurturing & Caretaking | Pro Dom(me)s | Mommy Issues | Popularization & Destigmatization | Incest Roleplay & Dark Ageplay (19:47–24:28) | Feelings & Vibes | Decisiveness | 24/7 vs. Not | Genderlessness |...

We’re so excited this week to be chatting with Mollena Lee Williams-Haas , a kink educator, podcaster , author, and performer. We got into a fascinating discussion about how kink can help you reconnect with your body, deepen your intimacy, push your boundaries and heal from your trauma.   Kink Doula | Reconnecting with the Body | Group Sex | Sustaining 24/7 Dynamics | Being the Bad Guy | Aftercare...

This week Kate has a nerdy chat with Sleepingirl , an author, podcaster, and long-time hypnokinkster who has created numerous erotic hypnosis resources , including LearnHypnokink.com .   Early Days of Hypno Fetishism | LearnHypnokink.com | Subject Skills | Milton Erickson & Utilization | Pacing & Leading | Consent in Trance | HypnoStory & Panda’s 101 Class | Meeting Other Fetishists | Long-Distanc...

It’s that time again: this week we’re celebrating 4/20 by getting blazed and answering “highpothetical” questions about sex and kink! Tune in for a jam-packed, silly discussion of questions like “Would you want to be able to read your partner’s mind during sex?” and “What one kink implement would you take on a desert island?”   Last Prisoner Project | Cannabis Amnesty | Destigmatizing a Kink | One...

This week we’re answering random sex advice questions, like: Is it hotter to wear a suit, or sweatpants? How can you enjoy sex when you’re trying not to come? And does jerking off to Lola Bunny make you a furry?   Facials | Fingering | Trying Not to Come | Dressed Up vs. Dressed Down | Lesbian Dating Men | Furries Credits: Music by PROTODOME Artwork by Addison Finch Become a patron to support the...

This week Billy is joined by his partner, Dee Darkholme , for a nerdy discussion of kinky roleplay: how characters get developed, which characters and tropes come up most often in their relationship, and how to make roles feel natural and authentic.   Nerdery | Roleplayer Radar | Cringe & Campiness | Kink vs. Sex | Taboo | ADHD Benefits | Aliens | Age Play | Robots | How Roles Evolve | Fantasizing...

We’ve both reviewed a LOT of sex toys, so this week we’re talking about the intricacies of sex toy reviewing: what makes a good review, how we test toys, and how readers can find reviewers whose opinions they trust.   How We Got Into It | Sexy Video Reviews | Testing Process | Hey Epiphora | Bad Toys | Choosing Toys | Annoying Misconceptions | “Soft Skills” | Review Format | SEO-ification | Good v...

Edging and denial go together very well, and this week we’re talking about both: why they can be fun, why they can be annoying and difficult, and how to do them well as a top and as a bottom.   Eroticizing Celibacy | Bottoming vs. Topping | Punishments & “Failure” | Ruined Orgasms | Velvet Veronica | Self-Control vs. Collaboration | Edging vs. Gooning | Altered States | Disinhibition & Vulnerabili...

Depression can put a strain on relationships, but it doesn’t have to! This week we’re talking to our friend JoEllen Notte , an author and mental health advocate, about her new book In It Together: Navigating Depression with Partners, Friends & Family .   “Are You Mad At Me?!” | How It Came to Be | Interview Process | Pandemic Changes | Check On Your Friends | Choosing Kindness | “Not My Place” | “...

Sometimes. paradoxically, it’s fun to suffer! This week we’re talking about suffering in a kink context: why we (sometimes) like it, how to do it safely, and how it differs from plain ol’ sadomasochism.   Drug Shortages | Pain as Pleasure | Is Suffering Sexual? | Sex as Aftercare | Pain vs. Suffering | Emotional Suffering | Justifiably Having a Bad Time | Sensory Nightmares | Gender Conditioning |...

It can be embarrassing (or hot! or both!) to come at the “wrong” time. This week we’re talking about inopportunely-timed orgasms, why they can be sexy as hell, and how to navigate any shame or awkwardness they might trigger.   Orgasm Control | Ruined Orgasms | Hormone Changes | Tampon in Science Class | Bathroom Sex | Premature Ejaculation Kink | “Try Not to Come” | Coming Untouched | Post-Orgasm...

Roleplay is a big part of both our sex/kink lives, but what does it actually mean to play a role? This week we’re diving into the intricacies of playing a character in scenes.   Full-Time Daddy-Domming | Trivialization of Roleplay | Performance & Acting | Archetypes & Stock Characters | “What Would They Do?” | Character Creation | Humiliation & Bullying | Robots & Aliens | Lore | Character Exercis...