Myopia Movies

Welcome to another episode of Myopia Movies! This week, we dive into the thrilling, edge-of-your-seat excitement of Unbreakable. Yes, that's right, the 2000 classic where Bruce Willis discovers his superpower: looking perpetually confused and slightly bored.  Join us as we unravel the mystery of how a movie about a guy who can't get hurt manages to hurt our attention spans. We'll discuss Samuel L....

This week on Myopia Movies, we lace up our roller skates and journey back to the glitter-soaked fever dream that is Xanadu. Join us as we watch Olivia Newton-John and a surprisingly spry Gene Kelly sing and skate their way through a plot so thin you could roller disco right through it. We'll break down the movie's mix of Greek muses, neon lights, and baffling dance numbers, and ask the burning que...

This week on Myopia Movies, we dive into the dark, brooding, and oh-so-edgy world of Constantine. Marvel as Keanu Reeves chain-smokes his way through a film that somehow mixes theology, horror, and noir into a cocktail of supernatural shenanigans. Join us as we explore why this movie's take on angels and demons is as subtle as a sledgehammer and why it's the cult classic you love to hate—or hate t...

This Week on Myopia Movies: We Dive into the Prehistoric Puzzler, "We're Back! A Dinosaur's Story" Join us as we unearth the cinematic fossil that is "We're Back! A Dinosaur's Story," where the idea of dinosaurs roaming modern New York City is somehow not the most unbelievable part. This week, we're peeling back the layers of this animated onion, revealing that beneath the surface, it's just more...

This week we watch Disney's first attempt at a superhero picture, Iron Man fights the Nazi's! We watched The Rocketeer, the movie that shows the dangers of alcohol.  How will The Rocketeer hold up?  Host: Daniel Panel: Matthew, Lauren, Charlie.  Directed by Joe Johnston Starring: Billy Campbell, Jennifer Connelly, Alan Arkin, Timothy Dalton, Paul Sorvino, Terry O'Quinn, Ed Lauter, James Handy, Rob...

This week on Myopia Movies, we watch a remake, that was not asked for, not needed, missed the point, but boldly had Night Vision! We watched Rollerball (2002) and saw Rebecca Romjin naked in a PG 13 Movie as the director of Die Hard imagines the horrors of 2005!  How will Rollerball (2002) hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Matthew, Keiko, Nur Directed by John McTiernan Starring: Chris Klein, Jean Reno, LL...

Welcome to Myopia Movies, this week we wish there was mo Emilio! We watched Mighty Ducks 3, the search for more money.  How will Mighty Ducks 3 hold up?  Host: Nic Panel: Keiko, Nur, Alex

This week on Myopia Movies, we watch a family film about dog fighting! We watched Pokemon: The First Movie, a film about GMOs, Euthanasia, and power no children should have.  How will Pokemon: The First Movie hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Daniel, Alex, Keiko, and Nur Directed by Kunihiko Yuyama Starring Veronica Taylor, Rachael Lillis, Eric Stuart, Rica Matsumoto  

This week on Myopia Movies, we are traumatized by another movie about flying by the director of Air Force One. Join us for childhood changing moments with The NeverEnding Story! How will The NeverEnding Story hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Kellie, Jon, Daniel.   Directed by Wolfgang Petersen Starring: Noah Hathaway, Barret Oliver, Tami Stronach, Gerald McRaney

This week we call the exterminator and do a deep cleaning. We finish Quinntober with the Guillermo del Toro creature feature Mimic (1997). The movie that has makes us afraid of CDC efforts to end malaria.  How will Mimic (1997) hold up? Host: Matthew  Panel: Nic and Charlie

Welcome by to a Quinntober Episode of Myopia! We are talking about the bespandexed and coweled Indiana Batman knock-off, The Phantom!  How will The Phantom hold up?  Host: Matthew Panel: Nic and Candace, and Nur(?) Directed by Simon Wincer Starring: Billy Zane, Kristy Swanson, Treat Williams, Catherine Zeta-Jones, James Remar, Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa, Patrick McGoohan

This week of Quinntober we join two familiar faces as they shoot lions. We watched The Ghost and the Darkness, the movie where a British white savior isn't enough; you need an American as well. How will the Ghost and the Darkness hold up? Host: Matthew Panel: Nic, Nur, and Candace   Directed by Stephen Hopkins Starring: Michael Douglas, Val Kilmer, Tom Wilkinson, John Kani

This week on Myopia Movies, would you look at that, it is Quinntober an entirely Matt Quinn programmed month, so we, of course are starting with a Sci-Fi Fantasy Movie, where priest warrior Paul Bettany fights vampires when the theocratic world government Catholic Church claims they have all been eliminated. Yup...Holy Hell this movie is nuts. Episode 450! Woo! How will Priest (2011) hold up? Host...

This week on Myopia Movies we finish our Romantic Month with a movie directed by one of the Airplane guys. We watched Ghost, the movie where Tony Goldwyn enters the ranks of greatest on-screen deaths.  How will Ghost hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Daniel, Nur, Keiko   Directed by Jerry Zucker Starring Patrick Swayze, Demi Moore, Whoopi Goldberg, Tony Goldwyn, Vincent Schiavelli, Phil Leeds

As we stretch this Romantic Month in to week four, how long is this shortest month, we watch the movie that brought Julia Roberts into our hearts. We saw Pretty Woman, everyone's favorite PG13 movie about prostitution. How will Pretty Woman hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Lauren, Keiko, Nur   Directed by Garry Marshall Starring: Richard Gere, Julia Roberts, Jason Alexander, Laura San Giacomo, Ralph Bell...

This week we seduce the man of our dreams using magic, and have no qualms about that. We watched Teen Witch, the lady version of Teen Wolf!  How will Teen Witch hold up?  Host: Nic Panel: Keiko, Lauren, Nur Directed by Dorian Walker Starring: Robyn Lively, Dan Gauthier, Joshua John Miller, Caren Kaye, Dick Sargent, Zelda Rubinstein  

This week we find Tim Curry terrifying and erotic, like most weeks. We watched Legend (1985), a friend pointed out that Tom Cruise's teeth don't line up in this film. I noticed it. I can't stop noticing it. Turns out, he needed to get rid of them thetans.  How will Legend (1985) hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Madison, Matthew, Keiko    Directed by Ridley Scott Starring: Tom Cruise, Mia Sara, Tim Curry,...

This week we give up our construction job to go full into our dancing hobby, we watched Flashdance another movie with a vague boyfriend named Nick.  How will Flashdance hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Lauren, Keiko and Nur Directed by Adrian Lyne Starring Jennifer Beals, Michael Nouri, Lilia Skala, Sunny Johnson, Kyle T. Heffnerm, Lee Ving

This week in Myopia Movies, we watch the horniest time travel movie this side of Cinemax. To round out my month of selections we go back in time with Back to the Future.  How will Back to the Future hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Charlie, Nur, and Candace   Directed by Robert Zemeckis Starring: Michael J. Fox, Christopher Lloyd, Lea Thompson, Crispin Glover, Tom Wilson, Claudia Wells, Marc McClure, Wen...

This week on Myopia Movies, we keep open the beaches. We continue Hoffmannia by watching Jaws, a reminder of the time I screamed at the beach after stepping on a sea nettle. How will Jaws hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Matthew, Nur, Keiko Directed by Steven Spielberg Starring Roy Scheider, Robert Shaw, Richard Dreyfuss, Lorraine Gary, Murray Hamilton, Carl Gottlieb  

This week on another Hoffmanniac Month episode, you stick with us, because you want to live. We watched Terminator 2: Judgement Day, asta la vista, baby.   Also, welcome Nur to the Cineprov Family! How will Terminator 2: Judgement Day hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Nur, Charlie, Matthew. Directed by James Cameron Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton, Edward Furlong, Robert Patrick, Earl Boen...

This week on Myopia Movies, we start Hofftober Month and enter the Nexus! We watched Star Trek: Generations, one more Christmas movie this season. Yes, I curated the whole month, and yes Star Trek is fantastic.  How will Star Trek: Generations hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Daniel, Nur, and Keiko.   Directed by David Carson Starring Patrick Stewart, William Shatner, Malcolm McDowell, Jonathan Frakes, B...

This week we visit the most depressing company Christmas Party in Cinema history. We watched Silent Night, Deadly Night, Bambi's revenge!  How will Silent Night, Deadly Night hold up?  Host: Nic Panel: Keiko, Matthew, and Charlie   Directed by Charles E. Sellier Jr. Starring Lilyan Chauvin, Gilmer McCormick, Toni Nero, Robert Brian Wilson

This week, with Christmas rapidly approaching, we revisit John Hughes' tight legal drama. We learn where John Hammond hid after Jurassic Park, we watched Miracle on 34th Street! How will Miracle on 34th Street hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Keiko and Nur Directed by Les Mayfield Written by Valentine Davies, George Seaton, John Hughes Starring Richard Attenborough, Elizabeth Perkins, Dylan McDermott, J....

This week on Myopia Movies, we learn it is ok to be a dentist. We splurge and watch two classic Rankin and Bass Shorts! We watched Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and The Year without a Santa Claus, ground zero for the classic holiday characters Yukon Cornelius, The Bumble, Snow Miser and Heat Miser, and an elf who wants to be a dentist! Watch the puppet magic of the Charlie in a box and it snowing...