Girl, Listen to This!

I used to think a wall only looked one way. Obvious. Cold. Easy to spot. It took me a long time to learn that sometimes a wall wears a friendly face, shows up consistently, stays in touch, and still never lets you all the way in. 🗣️ Continue the conversation at girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community .

This episode is a check-in on the weight so many of us are carrying right now, and a few honest, simple ways I'm taking care of myself in the middle of it. If you're in a dark or helpless place, please don't sit in it alone. Check out the mental health resources shared in the accompanying blog post in the community section of girllisten2this.wordpress.com .

I published an episode earlier this year that I liked, but something about it never sat right with me. When I finally sat with it again, I realized what I'd actually been feeling wasn't survivor's guilt. It was fear. In this episode, I talk about what it means to trust the clarity you've already earned, even when you were raised in a tradition that taught you not to trust yourself...

This week's episode is about how a favorite gospel song's meaning shifted for me, what it cost me to believe the old version, and what I found when I let the song mean something new. It touches on faith, worth, and the kind of victim mentality that can outlast the belief system that planted it. 🎙️Continue the conversation at https://girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community .

This week's episode is about what happens when someone rescinds your seat at their table, even after you've shown up for them in good faith. If you're the type of person who examines every interaction looking for the thing you did wrong, I hope this one gives you something to sit with. 🎙️ Continue the conversation at GirlListen2This.wordpress.com .

This one is about what authenticity actually costs, especially for Black women, since church and society keep telling us to "come as we are" and then punish us the moment we do. It's about the difference between someone withdrawing because you did something wrong and someone withdrawing because you finally stopped letting them have you on their terms. And it's about learning to h...

Have you ever had a vision for your life that the people around you didn't believe in? Or perhaps so much time has passed or your circumstances have changed without substantial progress that you figured you needed to let that vision go? I'm here to tell you your calling is real, and you don't need someone else's permission to walk in it. 💻 Continue the conversation at the associat...

There is a difference between contentment and complacency, and for a long time I did not know it. This episode picks up where we left off last week. We explore what contentment is, why it differs from complacency, and how white supremacy led to this confusion for many Black women. 📝 Read the show notes and references mentioned in this episode at the accompanying blog post: girllisten2this.wordpre...

What does it cost us to live on high alert all the time? There is a very real cost to our physical and mental health, so it behooves us to learn how to allow ourselves to breathe during those moments when things are good. 🧐 Links to studies referenced in this episode can be found at the accompanying blog post . Continue the conversation there!

Sometimes, due to unhealthy family dynamics, the process of becoming your own person gets delayed. Sometimes by years. Sometimes by decades. In this episode we talk about why that sometimes is and what the process of becoming your own person may look like. 🎙️ Continue the conversation at ⁠⁠girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community⁠⁠ .

When people talk about body image, they usually mean things like wanting to lose a few pounds or not liking their skin, but what I'm sitting with goes far deeper than that. I want to talk about it this episode, because I have a feeling a number of you are feeling the same way. 🎙️ Continue the conversation at girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community .

Black women are too often conditioned to downplay our abilities and accomplishments, and that can lead us to not believe in ourselves. But when we step back from those outside voices and take a good look at what we have done, we will see the evidence of our competence has always been there. We just have to stop talking ourselves out of owning it. 🎙️ Continue the conversation at girllisten2this.wor...

Hundreds of thousands of Black women are currently navigating a job market that isn't responding to what we know and are capable of. We need to know our worth remains and cannot be touched by any layoff, bully of a manager, or slow job market. 🎙️ Continue the conversation at girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community .

A seat at your table is not a birthright; it has to be earned. It can also be reconsidered. Let's talk about it this episode. Continue the conversation at girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community .

In this episode I'm talking about why other people's no — whether it comes at you loudly or quietly, through commands or just a look — is not the law of your life. I also want to name something real: for Black women in this country, compliance wasn't just a habit we picked up. It was a survival strategy we inherited. That's worth sitting with. Continue the conversation at https://g...

In this episode I talk about the boxes some of us were handed early on, the real gifts that were inside them, and the very real grief that comes when the promises they made don't pan out. And I talk about what I believe is true: that living as yourself, without performance and without apology, is one of the most generous things you can do -- for yourself and for everyone around you. Continue t...

You're riding home feeling grateful, saying thank you to the universe for meeting your needs -- and then it hits you. Isn't that exactly what people do when they thank God for sparing their house while their neighbor's is flattened? In this episode, we sit with survivor's guilt, worthiness, and what it really means to hold gratitude and grief at the same time -- when nobody's r...

What if you've been resilient this whole time and just didn't know it? In this episode, I share a conversation that completely changed the way I see myself and resilience. We're letting go of the "bounce back" myth and looking at the quiet, everyday ways you're already showing up for yourself. 🎙️ girllisten2this.wordpress.com

The idea of being the "bigger person" has been weaponized to silence survivors. In this episode, Lotus describes how this concept can be reframed. Join the conversation at ⁠ ⁠⁠⁠girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community/ .

For some of us, knowing someone is disappointed in us or having someone harshly criticize us can color our sense of our own worth or ability. But we need not and should not define ourselves according to the people who have a low opinion of us. Join the conversation at ⁠ ⁠⁠girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community/⁠.

It can be challenging to walk the tightrope between wanting to be rescued from life's challenges and wanting to never depend on anyone ever again. But that is part of the work of being a well-adjusted adult. Join the conversation at ⁠ ⁠girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community/⁠.

I grew up singing hymns like "I'll Fly Away" and feeling inspired by the promise of a better future after death. But while I still enjoy this song for the nostalgic feelings it stirs in me, I have reevaluated what role this hymn should play in my approach to life. Join the conversation at ⁠ girllisten2this.wordpress.com/community/⁠.

Gospel music was the soundtrack of Lotus' life well into adulthood. But as she has evolved in recent years she found herself reevaluating whether it could fit into her life at all. Join the conversation at girllisten2this.wordpress.com .

In the grand scheme of things, it may seem as though you don't matter much. But for the people in your life, what you do matters a great deal. Learn more about this podcast and join the mailing list at girllisten2this.wordpress.com .

The times when it feels like your world is on fire are when you most need to make time to stop, breathe, and ground yourself. That pause can help you get in touch with the hope you need to keep going. Learn more about the podcast at girllisten2this.wordpress.com.