Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled

Janet addresses a parent’s concerns about her daughter’s unwillingness to play independently. She seems to need constant stimulation and entertainment. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at www.nobadkidscourse.com or www. JanetLansbury.com. For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books in paperback at Amazon and in audio at Audible. See Pri...

We may not always agree with the parenting styles of our relatives and friends, and that's okay. Get-togethers can still be enjoyable, positive social experiences for us and for our kids. In this episode, Janet offers her perspective on some of the common challenges that arise in gatherings with friends, family, and in public situations with other kids and parents. Her suggestions include:  How to...

A concerned parent writes that her 3-year-old seems to be in a constant state of frustration or anxiety, and she makes outlandish demands and cries when she doesn’t get her way. While this mom tries to be compassionate, it’s getting more and more difficult, and she worries that her own postpartum anxiety may have modeled the behavior. She’s looking for healthy ways to help them both cope. Janet's...

Janet's guest is psychologist, writer, researcher, and Harvard lecturer Susan Linn. For decades, Susan has been a passionate advocate for our children and a steadfast fighter against the infiltration of Big Business and Big Tech into kids' lives (and parents' pocketbooks). In an eye-opening discussion, Susan describes how digital culture is designed to indoctrinate children into consumerism and br...

Many of us imagine late afternoons or evenings with our children as the perfect time to wind down and connect after a busy day. Unfortunately, this is often precisely when our children need to unload the day’s stresses. Which means that instead of enjoying restorative quality time together, we're faced with challenging behavior, high emotions, and discontent. Janet unpacks some of the reasons why...

Janet is joined by Nedra Tawwab: therapist, relationship expert, and author of the NY Times best-seller “Set Boundaries, Find Peace.” Nedra and Janet discuss how our personal boundaries with friends, family, co-workers, and children are crucial for building positive, healthy relationships. Nedra emphasizes how boundaries begin with being kinder to ourselves. "We are in relationships from the time...

A parent with a family in transition writes about a series of mischievous and sometimes destructive incidents perpetrated by her toddler. She’s wondering how to address these situations, especially after the fact when the deed is already done. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out...

Sleep is an essential element of our happiness and well-being. If our child is not sleeping, then chances are good that we aren’t either. Many families are content with the sleep situations in their households, and more power to them. Others seek advice and solutions because they struggle night after night. Still others fear that making any kind of change in their approach could threaten their att...

Janet responds to a mother who writes that she tries to sportscast disagreements between her older two children, but since the 2-year-old isn’t verbal yet, “it’s hard when I don’t really know what he’s thinking.” She’s wondering how to sportscast situations effectively without making assumptions about what her boy may be thinking or feeling in that moment. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is av...

A frustrated parent who describes herself as “desperate for help” seeks advice about her persistent, high-energy 2.5-year-old, who dominates her and her husband's time and energy with relentless demands to be the focus of their universe -- all day, every day. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. For more advice on common parenting issues, p...

Our children's impatience and low tolerance for frustration can… well, test our patience! In this week's episode, Janet responds to a question from a listener about how to teach a toddler to be more patient. Janet considers what patience really means to a child, how it develops, and how our expectations as parents and caregivers may get in the way. Her recommendations (as is often the case) may be...

A parent who’s always been her toddler’s playmate helps her child over the hump to flourish in independent play. Another parent learns to set boundaries, shift her perspective, and accept her child’s meltdowns. Janet shares a special milestone and much more in this latest episode of Unruffled. Thanks to Ritual for sponsoring this episode. Janet's new "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at www...

Janet responds to a parent who wonders how to react to her daughter's consistently stubborn behavior. "I feel like I have a set of tools to handle my 4-year-old daughter's outbursts of emotions, but I am at a loss for what to do when she stoically disobeys or ignores me altogether." Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. For more on respectfu...

Janet responds to an email from a parent who says that lately, she has found herself yelling at her 3-year-old, who’s been having a difficult time since the birth of her brother. She realizes that yelling is not helping her daughter, and it’s not the parent she wants to be. “I’ve really lost control of this parenting thing and need a reset.” Janet new "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at ww...

Clinical psychologist Jean Cheng joins Janet to discuss the puzzling, painful, and self-defeating feelings that our children's behaviors can bring up in us as parents. No matter how well educated and prepared we are for this role, we might find ourselves overwhelmed and viscerally reacting by yelling, threatening, or "checking out." Often the answer lies in our own childhoods, in subtle wounds and...

Janet helps a struggling parent understand her spirited toddler’s aggressive behavior and offers suggestions to respond more effectively. Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is available at NoBadKidsCourse.com and JanetLansbury.com. Janet's exclusive audio series "Sessions" is available for download. This is a collection of recorded one-on-one consultations with parents discussing their most immed...

How do we help our children benefit from the privilege of extracurricular activities? At what age should we enroll our kids in lessons and sports? Janet has a child-centered approach that not everyone will agree with, but she believes is "too good not to share." She discusses how parents can discern their child's readiness and describes the benefits and challenges of making readiness our priority....

It can be so hard to separate from our children sometimes! Particularly if they cry, seem anxious, or strongly object. How can we prepare our children (and ourselves) for a successful transition? Janet responds to emails from two different families struggling with goodbyes at school drop-off and offers recommendations for a helpful and respectful approach to handling all transitions and separation...

The practice of acknowledging our children's feelings and struggles can provide healing, calming messages of safety and acceptance. With a genuine tone and a few words, our acknowledgments can help children share pent-up emotions, feel seen and heard, and gradually regulate, which in turn eases problematic behaviors. However, parents commonly share with Janet that validating feelings doesn't work...

The mother of two boys feels they are constantly testing her limits and always at her side demanding attention. They won’t allow her a moment to handle daily chores like laundry or cooking, never mind her personal needs. “They think it’s funny, “ she writes, “and I undoubtedly lose my patience. I feel like they just don’t listen to whatever limit I’ve set.” Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" is a...

Janet shares an exchange she had with a parent who wonders how anyone can possibly live up to the extreme idealism of "gentle parenting." She writes: “It sounds so lovely… but it’s also crushing to never be able to live up to despite having all the tools and knowledge.” While "gentle parenting" is not a term Janet uses, she understands that it's a catch-all for recent discussions and news articles...

We all aspire for our children to grow up with a positive self-image and an abundance of self-confidence. When life throws our child a dilemma, it’s our natural instinct to want to fix it, or at least work them through the uncomfortable feelings with a pep talk. In this episode, Janet answers questions from three listeners and offers a more helpful – albeit counterintuitive – perspective that can...

A mother writes that her toddler son “can’t keep his hands off” his 10-month old sister. She describes his demeanor as a mixture of excitement and affection, but she also senses an undertone of aggression. She wants them both to feel her support when they’re together in one space, but she finds herself either holding him back or removing the baby altogether. “I’d like to find a safe way for them t...

Early childhood expert Kisha Reid joins Janet in a lively conversation about the often overlooked and underestimated benefits of play-driven learning and how we can nurture these lifelong gifts for our children. Kisha and Janet discuss the magic of trusting children to discover and develop their passions and how our fears, misperceptions, and impatience as parents can get in their way. Reid weighs...

Janet shares an exchange with a mom requesting "alternatives to time out when natural consequences aren’t appropriate." The parent wonders how to intervene with her toddler when she is possessive and aggressive around other kids. For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible. Paperbacks and e-books are also available at Amazon, Google Play, Barn...