Love and Life with Dr. Karin and Pastor Elliott

If you’ve ever wondered if you have “daddy issues” or been curious as to how your relationship with your father influences the men you choose and the dynamics you experience in relationships, this episode is for you!  Psychotherapist Elliott Anderson and I take a deep dive into how father wounds show up in our romantic relationships—and most importantly, how we can heal these wounds so as to...

You loved episode 92 in which Dr. Welch taught us what it means to date as a “high status” woman. Several of you had follow up questions about this concept, so when Dr. Welch joined me this week on the podcast (ep. 123), I asked her if she’d be willing to stick around and record a bonus episode to address your concerns. She agreed and here we are!  As for the questions: Taryn wants to know ho...

Love & Life fan favorite, Dr. Duana Welch is back!  In this episode, Dr. Welch shares the psych research on breaking up and moving on.  Join us as we discuss how to: Choose healing and peace even after the most devastating breakup. Guarantee you’ll never get emotionally abused. Convey your needs in relationships—even early on! Recognize our attachment style and work with it as we hea...

“More than one in four women take medication to treat a mental health condition” (Medco Health Solutions). Are 25% of us actually clinically depressed and anxious? Or, might diagnostic inflation be at work? Psychologist Dr. Steven C. Hayes speaks to this and more in his new book, Beyond the DSM: Toward a Process-Based Alternative for Diagnosis and Mental Health Treatment. Join us for a conversatio...

I get asked about hope a lot: ·   How can I stay hopeful when the dating scene is so bleak? ·   How can I maintain a hopeful attitude after being ghosted yet again ? ·   How can I hold onto hope? All the good ones are taken! Maintaining a happy, hopeful, positive attitude when you’ve been dating for a long time—way longer than you expected or wanted to—isn’t easy at a...

Ella has a history of dating bad boys, but she’s trying to turn this around!  She listened to episode 63 with Ken Page, LCSW, bought his book, Deeper Dating , and is working on cultivating what Ken calls Attractions of Inspiration, as opposed to Attractions of Deprivation. But when she dates nice guys, she’s just not into them. She tries to give them a chance, but finds she’s bored and uninte...

Mandy struggles with something so many of us can relate to—the guys she doesn’t care for are into her, while the guys she wants don’t seem to be interested.  In this mini Love & Life episode, I share the science of flirting from Dr. Duana Welch’s book, Love Factually for Single Parents and Those Dating Them . Learn 6 research-based ways to signal your interest in a guy, while remaining, w...

In this third mini Love & Life episode, I answer Pam’s question about how to know if a guy is manipulating her. She recently went on a first date with a man who led with smarmy and inappropriately suggestive conversation. When she bristled, he asked her if she wasn’t comfortable with her body. He then went on to say that he’d absolutely need to test drive the car before buying. Join us as I di...

In this second mini Love & Life episode, I answer Theresa’s question about when she should meet her bf’s kids.  He’s protective of his children and doesn’t want to introduce them to her too soon (which is great) yet because of this, she doesn’t want him to get into the habit of just crashing at her place—because she wants to be properly courted (which is wise).  Join us as I share my...

In this mini Love & Life episode, I answer Kelly’s question about how she can find a way to support her friends even though they’re making unhealthy decisions in their relationships.  I share 3 options for how to love our friends even when we hate some of their choices.

Human trafficking is an unfathomable and horrific atrocity.  We feel so helpless; we don’t know what to do or how to combat it.  Thankfully, there are organizations working on the front lines.  And, all of us can make an impact by supporting their efforts to save lives.  Talitha Baker, chair of the board of Dressember joins me to share how Dressember raises awareness and funds...

Recently, I asked my newsletter community if anyone wanted to share an encouraging and empowering story on the podcast. Quin Taylor (one of my former students from Chicago State University) answered the call, agreeing to speak about living with a chronic illness. She describes how intentionally focusing on gratitude allows her to maintain a positive, empowered perspective in the midst of daily phy...

According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, anxiety disorders affect 40 million adults (18.1% of the population). The ADAA asserts, “anxiety disorders are highly treatable, yet only 36.9% of those suffering receive treatment.”  Psychotherapist Linda Ruvalcaba understands anxiety—both from a clinical perspective and from personal experience!  She endured anxiety’s terr...

We’ve all been there—we got knocked down and we’re trying our best to recover but we feel stuck. We find it hard to feel happy. We sink into depressed moods. We’ve lost our joy and even worse, we wonder, can I ever get back to my former self?  Well, according to neuropsychologist, Dr. Rhonda Freeman, we absolutely can!  Join us to learn how to: ·    pivot away from ruminat...

According to Family Systems theorists, our family of origin’s expectations for connectedness and separateness influence—and, at times, may impede—our ability to carve out and cultivate an independent identity and authentic sense of self. Clearly, our family of origin impacts us beyond childhood—in terms of our friendships, work relationships, and certainly, our romantic connections. Mary Beth Somi...

According to psychologist Albert Ellis, “People don’t just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness.”  And, specifically, it’s irrational thinking that contributes to our “upsetness.” As the founder of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), Ellis encourages us to identify our irrational beliefs, challenge them, and replace them with rational beliefs.  He asserts—and research subs...

If you’re single, your love life (or lack thereof) is fair game. Friends, family members, and even random strangers provide “solutions” to your “problem.” Or, they interrogate you, determined to uncover the hidden reason you aren’t coupled up—even if you’re perfectly content sans partner!  In this Love & Life bonus episode, Debbi Rice of Single and Amazing, Leslie Kaz of Single Girl Bliss...

It’s National Unmarried and Single Americans Week!  To kick it off, I’ve invited Shani Silver, host of A Single Serving podcast, to share how she moved from complaining about dating to championing the single life!  According to Shani, “I came out of a hole and I know the way out of the hole. I want to tell other people that it’s possible.”  Here are a few more gems of wisdom from my...

When life doesn’t play out as planned, we experience loss—of expectations, hopes, and dreams.  And, as with every loss, we grieve .  But how do we grieve something we never had in the first place? Christina and Genet of The Radical Stepmoms podcast join me to discuss just that—grieving the life they thought they’d have, while still embracing and cherishing the life they do have.  At...

I often get asked, “What we should be looking for when dating?  Which qualities indicate a person will be a committed, solid, loving partner?”  Recently, I came across a framework by psychiatrist Dr. Stephen Marmer describing emotional maturity.  As I examined the model, I was struck by how the characteristics of maturity mirror those qualities we need in a romantic partner—if we’re...

It’s time for another Love & Life Q&A !  In this episode, I answer two questions I recently received.  One listener asks how she can possibly maintain hope for finding love; she’s over 40 and feeling demoralized and worries she’ll never meet her person.  Another listener wonders if she can salvage a relationship that’s gone off course.  After seeing a guy for a couple m...

We are kicking season 5 off with Dr. Duana Welch to discuss attachment styles and dating!  Have you ever experienced the following? ·        You felt an initial spark, but got turned off when he/she came on too strong. ·        Someone ghosted you after what you thought was the beginning of a very happy relationship. · &nbs...

We’ve all heard that journaling can be therapeutic.  But how does writing down our thoughts and feelings heal our emotional wounds?  In this episode, we explore all this and more with Stacy Brookman of “Life Story Laboratory.” Stacy shares how writing helps us process our experiences, recover from trauma, and take back our power!  Stacy explains how we can discover our life’s “theme...

We’re celebrating Love & Life’s 100th episode! And, as a thank you to our Love & Life family, we’ve made this episode all about what you love most! We start by discussing the inspiration behind your three favorite Instagram posts—the mindset shifts that helped me remain hopeful and positive despite multiple heartbreaks over my MANY years of dating. We then break down a powerful approach fr...

Sunday, July 26, 2020 is the 12th annual National Auntie’s Day—a day for celebrating the special bond between women and their nieces and nephews.  It’s an opportunity to highlight the unique and important contribution aunts make to the development of the children in their lives.  I’m an aunt and so are many of you, so I’m pleased to welcome the founder of Auntie’s Day and author of Other...