Linoleum Knife

Alonso and Dave are feeling collegial and enjoying the fact that they aren't quite sure what exactly happens in that new Scarlett Johansson movie (the one that Captain America isn't in). Like us on Facebook, follow us @linoleumcast, buy our commentary tracks by PayPal-ing $1.99 each to linoleumpodcast@gmail.com. Linoleum Knife is brought to you by THE REEL TRUTH: EVERYTHING YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEE...

Dave and Alonso argue over who's boss but also acknowledge that it might be Jude Law or Chris Evans. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, subscribe for free at iTunes, visit linoleum-knife.com, catch a falling star and put it in your pocket. Pick up Reed Martin's THE REEL TRUTH: EVERYTHING YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEEDED TO KNOW ABOUT MAKING AN INDEPENDENT FILM at http://amzn.to/1f7rQiZ Sig...

Dave & Alonso make O-faces for Lars Von Trier and O RLY-faces for Arnold Schwarzenegger. Like our Facebook page, subscribe and review us on iTunes, follow us @linoleumcast, it's a lot like life. Linoleum Knife is sponsored by THE REEL TRUTH: EVERYTHING YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEEDED TO KNOW TO MAKE AN INDEPENDENT FILM by Reed Martin http://amzn.to/1f7rQiZ and No Budget Film School's "The Art & Science...

Dave and Alonso juggle a new sponsor, another Jesus movie, possible food poisoning and a movie they forgot to cover last week, so please forgive them for not getting around to "Nymphomaniac, Vols. 1 and 2." Subscribe on iTunes, like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, and we all shine on, like the moon and the stars and the sun. Buy our CLUE episode/commentary for just $1.99, PayPal-ed to...

Dave and Alonso have a new theme song AND a new Tyler Perry movie to dissect, so it's like double Christmas around here. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, PayPal $1.99 each to linoleumpodcast@gmail.com for our commentary tracks for CLUE and THE APPLE, do do that voodoo that you do so well. Linoleum Knife is brought to you by THE REEL TRUTH: EVERTHING YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEEDED TO KN...

Dave and Alonso discuss the "faggy"-osity of the 300 franchise and concoct better plot twists for Annette Bening's latest. Subscribe and review us on iTunes, like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast and hey I passed you on the street. The Linoleum Knife Podcast is sponsored by THE REEL TRUTH: EVERYTHING YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEEDED TO KNOW ABOUT MAKING AN INDEPENDENT MOVIE by Reed Martin. htt...

Dave and Alonso both make embarrassing production mistakes before discussing why there hasn't been a decent Jesus movie in decades, and why there needs to be an action movie about a guy who bumps into things and spills food on his clothing. Sponsored by THE REEL TRUTH: EVERYTHING YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEED TO KNOW TO MAKE AN INDEPENDENT FILM by Reed Martin. Leave us a nice review (and subscribe) on...

Dave and Alonso have a new tape deck! Also lots of opinions about the healing powers of Dakota Fanning, Child Veterinarian. Visit linoleum-knife.com, subscribe for free (and review us!) at iTunes, like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, I dreamed I saw the knights in armor coming, saying something about a queen.

Dave and Alonso welcome Matt Zoller Seitz, author of THE WES ANDERSON COLLECTION, editor-in-chief of RogerEbert.com and TV critic for Vulture to discuss everything from "Bottle Rocket" set visits to the most interesting filmmaker hiding in the ensemble of "Girls." Follow Matt @mattzollerseitz ooh la la.

Dave and Alonso make their way through a sea of '80s remakes this week. Leave us a nice review on iTunes (and subscribe to the show while you're at it), like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast and he be makin' like a beeline, headin' for the borderline, goin' for broke.

Dave and Alonso marvel over how plastic toys can be more compelling that George Clooney saving art from the Nazis, and speaking of, Dave has lots of Holocaust documentary to talk about. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast and go to linoleum-knife.com and buy our new commentary track for THE APPLE (1980), where my love can be found and my heart rings true.

Dave and Alonso remember the extraordinary actor-director and lament his passing before moving on to more utterly mediocre January toss-offs. Hey, go to our site and buy our commentary for THE APPLE! Also, subscribe (and review) at iTunes, like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, I just know that something good is going to happen.

Dave and Alonso are currently without a cassette player, but they have plenty to say about gargoyles, French onanists and Rosario Dawson's meth teeth. (In character!) Subscribe and review us at iTunes, like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, like a bleary-eyed baboon to an organ grinder's tune.

Dave and Alonso recorded an episode before Alonso left for Sundance because math is hard, apparently. Subscribe for free (and review us) at iTunes, like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, you're the national gallery, you're double salary, you're cellophane.

Dave and Alonso are joined by Manohla Dargis (The New York Times) and Robert Abele (Los Angeles Times) to stick a fork in 2013. Like us on Facebook, follow us @linoleumcast & subscribe and leave us a nice review at iTunes. I know my chicken, you got to know your chicken.

Dave and Alonso look back on 2013 with L.A. Weekly critic Amy Nicholson -- and yes, she explains how "Pain and Gain" made her Top 10 list. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, visit linoleum-knife.com, leave us a nice iTunes review, three's not a crowd to her, she says.

Dave and Alonso have a heapin' helpin' of Christmas releases to shovel through on this last episode of 2013, but luckily the hilarious and insightful Drew Droege @drewdroege is here to lend a hand and an opinon. Subscribe (and review us) on iTunes, like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, and a love beat is a good vibration.

Dave and Alonso revel in a relatively light pre-Christmas week before the flood of year-end releases, so there's plenty of time to discuss catchphrases, contemporary art and the hotness of Spaniards. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, subscribe (and leave us a nice review) on iTunes, wonderland, wonderland, shining star, jingle bells.

Dave and Alonso try to fix Madea and share questions and theories about a beloved and much-hated Christmas staple, still finding time to discuss frozen jelly donuts and British chocolate biscuits. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, subscribe (and rate us) on iTunes, buy our shirt and commentary and books, you're all that I need, underneath the tree.

Dave and Alonso are joined by Sean Abley, author of "Out in the Dark: Interviews with Gay Horror Filmmakers, Actors and Authors" to discuss folkies, hill people and cat peril. Buy a T-shirt or a book or a commentary track! Drop us a line at linoleumpodcast@gmail.com. You're much better with than without it.

Dave and Alonso aren't entirely sure what two of their favorite African American filmmakers are up to in their latest, but at least Jason Statham is always Jason Statham. Buy a T-shirt or Alonso's book! Drop us a line at linoleumpodcast@gmail.com. Like our Facebook page and stuff. Rootie-toot-toots and rummy-tum-tums.

Dave and Alonso ponder why so much of the "Hunger Games" marketing is aspirational toward the villains, as well as other cinematic mysteries. Subscribe for free on iTunes, where we would love it if you would leave us a positive review, like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, buy a book, buy a shirt, every rose has its thorn.

Dave and Alonso know it isn't Christmas yet, but they've already started playing holiday music on KOST in Los Angeles and Terrence Howard looks spiffy in a red scarf, so there you go. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, leave us a nice review on iTunes, you just walked right in, walked walked walked right in.

Dave and Alonso wonder why parking (and cheese) is so expensive in Beverly Hills, and they hate inappropriately sappy Holocaust movies. All this and more on this week's episode. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, leave us a nice review on iTunes, things that you would not do at home come naturally on the floor.

Dave and Alonso tackle aspirate h-es, magical homos and controversial authors in this week's installment. Like our Facebook page, follow us @linoleumcast, leave us a nice review (and subscribe for free) at iTunes, attention to me seemed to drift though I don't know where.