Battle Plan

There can be many reasons why others do not see the value we have to share. Those interested in finding will often see it quickly in our actions and behaviors without needing to point it out to them. On the other hand, it is a futile effort to try to get someone to see what they do not want or refuse to see – not to mention a waste of your precious time and energy. When we let go of feeling like w...

Intellectual intelligence is necessary and can be of great benefit in navigating life. Having knowledge can solve a litany of challenges. When it comes to emotional states and wounds, having the emotional intelligence to show kindness and compassion can go further, mean more, and promote healing far more significant than knowledge alone. Emotional wounds heal best when we apply our hearts and hear...

If we are honest with ourselves, people in this world take joy and pleasure in causing others pain. Yes, sometimes it is unintentional or related to what they had for lunch. But more often, their behavior is out of selfishness, other times out of insecurity, and too often out of meanness and spite from those who have not faced or healed from the wounds inflicted on them. It is easier to be mean th...

Thoughts are naturally occurring. Sometimes, they are good; other times, we are plagued by the not-so-good thoughts. This can become particularly troublesome when we allow those negative thoughts to linger longer than they should, pulling us into a downward spiral of chaos and overthinking. The good news is that we can learn to harness the power to stop thoughts in their tracks, separating fact fr...

Human nature is to desire to belong, fit in, and socialize with others we enjoy being around. Humans are social mammals, after all. Isolation can be detrimental to our mental and emotional well-being, even taking a toll on us physically over prolonged periods. That said, life food that has spoiled or we are allergic to, persistent exposure to the toxicity of being around those who devalue you can...

We will all lose loved ones, which tends to change us forever, depending on our relationship with them. Separate from this, we cross paths with many people in our lives that come and go. Some of those relationships end intentionally, while others end unexpectedly or unfortunately. Nearly all relationships of substance and meaning create the sting of loss when ending. Sometimes, we even feel like w...

Many factors can influence human behavior. These can include childhood trauma and experiences, environmental factors, family constellation, and genetics, which can all impact our temperament development and self-worth. Even under ideal conditions while growing up, exposure to toxic human behavior, when no longer protected by the haven of our family environment, can wreak havoc on a person and infl...

Energy is a priceless resource. Our energy can attract or repel. While energy does regenerate, we do not have an endless supply at any given moment. When we endure the energy-draining disregard of being tolerated rather than accepted or respected, this can rob us of the energy needed to manage, cope, and navigate life. We gain nothing by trying to force matters with others who do not want or value...

We get the honor of meeting many people in this life. Most of those we cross paths with are temporary or seasonal, with few lasting a lifetime. Some encounters enhance our lives, while others leave wounds and scars. Only we can and should determine which relationships best serve us, our mental health, and our well-being. While it may be true when it comes to material objects that having some degre...

In life, we all make mistakes. Negative behaviors can stem from several factors, like past trauma and psychological or personality disorders. Try as we may, we cannot control another human being – they must want to change for change to occur. At best, we may be able to influence. When we attempt to compel or demand forcefully, the change tends to be short-lived when forced under duress. As adults,...

Generally speaking, we are best served to acknowledge and allow ourselves to experience our emotions. Anger is one of those natural emotions. Leveraged correctly, it can empower us to pursue a just cause or purpose. However, as with any emotion, in excess, anger can become a trap, a pit, or even a grave. Being quick to anger or dwelling there for extended periods can rob us of our creativity and p...

Making mistakes is something every one of us do. It is a normal part of progress, growth, and personal development. They can provide us with prime learning opportunities. Regardless of the size of the mistake or how much time, energy, or effort we put into making it, no amount of continuing down a path that does not serve us will make the mistake better or no longer a mistake. Most likely, that ap...

It often feels good to help someone else. Doing so can feed our altruistic self, enabling us to feel good about ourselves. Kindness expressed and shared can not only help others heal but can often help in the healing process of our own wounds. Motives for giving can vary from pure intentions, a distraction from pain, to hidden agendas that can create more harm than good. That said, it is also cruc...

Speaking confidently based on the direct knowledge obtained is often viewed as being a subject matter expert. In truth, some who lack the knowledge but possess the charisma and skill to say things in a confident manner are oftentimes indistinguishable in appearance from those who have worked hard to gain their knowledge. Using knowledge gained to advance the good of the whole is a noble cause and...

The effect of physically harming someone is generally easy to spot. However, we do not need to inflict physical harm to wound others. Mental, emotional, and psychological harm can be far more challenging to see, often hidden, and sometimes, our awareness only occurs when the wounded share that they have been hurt. In the minority are the small people who intend to inflict emotional wounds on other...

Embark on a serene journey to peace and tranquility with this six-minute guided meditation. Sometimes, it can all feel like too much, causing us to feel like we are struggling to shake off the weighty thoughts, worries, and mind residue of the challenges before us. Know that you are not alone. Consider investing in yourself in mindful meditation by exploring this guided meditation written and reco...

There is very little in life that we control outside ourselves, our behaviors, and our actions. Experiencing the estimated thousands of thoughts we face daily can feel overwhelming. We are best served when trying to change our behaviors by doing so at the thought stage, before developing an emotion around the thought, and before we act on it. We can learn to manage our thoughts instead of them con...

More often than not, what we experience in life helps to shape our views, thoughts, and behaviors. This can lead to the creation and existence of internal conflicts. Many times, when we encounter toxic behaviors from others, it is a direct result of their internal conflicts stemming from their traumas and life experiences. In other words, they are hurting, struggling, and feeling less than on the...

How often do we ask ourselves “why” when the behavior we experience from others is the same as it has always been? As creatures of habit, we tend to gravitate toward familiarity, even when it is unhealthy and even painful for us. When we fully embrace that we do not control others and that their behaviors predominately stem from their life experiences, we begin to free ourselves from the revolving...

Not much in life is permanent - not even our very own lives. We may desire and be passionate about holding on to something, but that in and of itself does not mean it will remain or even last as long as we like. Our becoming too comfortable accepting less than we should for ourselves, even with the unpleasant, can lead to complacency and stagnation. Sometimes, our growth depends on our willingness...

Most have probably heard the saying, “Small minds talk about people, average minds discuss events and great minds discuss ideas.” While the interpretations may vary, the spirit is meant to point out that if we consume ourselves by looking down on, finding fault with, and judging others, therein lay the extent of our world, existence, and impact - small. When we focus on only the flaws in others, w...

Many have come to believe that they need others to complete them. As humans, yes, most of us naturally desire belonging, socialization, and companionship. The question to ask ourselves is at what cost ?’ Having a quality support system for the good times and the not-so-good can be highly beneficial. It can also be highly unhealthy, detrimental, and even dangerous to our mental health and well-bein...

An inevitability in this life is that we will experience times when someone does something that we find hurtful. Sometimes, it is intentional on their behalf, while most times, it is unintended. That does not change the fact that it can be painful. If we are being honest, we all make mistakes. There is a saying that goes; the first time is a mistake; the second time is a choice. When we experience...

Environments where there is increasing emphasis being placed on external influences, significance seeking, and the undo pressure to be “better” than everyone else can produce high levels of toxicity to our peace and well-being. While competition in some forms can be healthy, persistent and unnecessary comparisons to others can be harmful to us, going so far as to rob us of motivation, inviting dis...

Not all relationships are healthy for us. While this may seem obvious, it is important to also note that we are under no obligation to continue to maintain, support, or participate in relationships that have negative impacts on our mental health, peace, or well-being. This includes casual acquaintances up through family members. The hard truth is that the humans who are closest to us can cause us...