HERself

Reflecting on the past ten years feels especially meaningful as Abby turns 40 and we both hit a decade of motherhood. While there’s no version of the last ten years where everything would’ve been done “perfectly,” there’s so much growth, perspective, and beauty in what we’ve learned along the way. This conversation is your reminder to look back on your own journey with a glass-half-full mindset be...

This week, we’re answering your questions straight from Instagram, and a clear theme emerged: relationships. From navigating constant arguments after the kids go to bed to figuring out how to move forward when you and your partner feel completely out of sync, we’re sharing honest insights, personal experiences, and practical mindset shifts that have made a real difference in our own marriages. We...

This episode was inspired by a post from one of our favorite Instagram therapy accounts, @millennial.therapist, titled “Let’s Stop Postponing.” It sparked an honest conversation as we walked through each point and reflected on how these patterns show up in our own lives. From expressing appreciation to making decisions, navigating emotions, and leaning into joy, we share where we feel confident, w...

After Amy sparked a conversation on Instagram about expecting more independence from her boys, it became clear just how many moms are wondering the same thing: when do you start, and how do you actually follow through? In this episode, we’re sharing how we’ve gradually increased expectations in our own homes, why contributing to the household matters, and how to get your kids involved in a realist...

Hormones, sleep, nutrition… or something else entirely? When your body starts to feel “off,” it’s not always easy to pinpoint what’s actually going on, especially during perimenopause. In this episode, we are so excited to sit down with Dr. Mary Claire Haver; board-certified OB/GYN, Certified Culinary Medicine Specialist, Certified Menopause Provider, and the founder of The ‘Pause Wellness, a priv...

It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to other women and feeling jealous, intimidated, or like you’re somehow behind. But what if you could shift that mindset and instead feel genuinely inspired by the success around you? In this episode, we share a recent real-life experience from a mastermind we attended with highly successful business owners and how it challenged us to see compa...

Mom guilt has shaped so many seasons of our motherhood journeys, but it does not hold the same power it once did. In this honest and reflective conversation, we look back on what used to weigh heavily on our hearts and compare it to the much shorter lists we carry today. From work-related guilt and feeling torn between responsibilities, to struggling to fully enjoy our kids while managing the chao...

Editing your life doesn’t require a dramatic overhaul, it starts with small, intentional shifts every single day. In this episode, we explore what it really means to take an “edit” mindset into your routines, your responsibilities, and even the expectations you carry. From closets to calendars to long-held commitments, we share how thoughtful adjustments can reduce overwhelm and create more breath...

Some comments linger longer than they should. A tone, a look, an offhand remark from your partner, your child, or a friend can spiral into a story in your head before you even realize it. This conversation unpacks what it really takes to not take things personally, especially in the relationships that matter most. From defensiveness and truth triggers to slowing down your reactions and separating...

No one really tells you how much parenting shifts once your kids reach school age, and there are a few things we deeply wish we had known sooner. The early years are all-consuming and survival-focused, which makes forward thinking feel nearly impossible. Now on the other side of that stage, we reflect on the bigger transitions kids experience once they enter school and the areas that deserve a lit...

We turned the conversation over to you and asked one powerful question: In what ways do you struggle with comparison? The overwhelming response was the realization that comparison shows up far more often than we think, especially around money, careers, bodies, relationships, and even our kids. We unpack why comparison feels so loud today, how much of what we see is a highlight reel, and why everyo...

Parenting in a village isn’t anything new. It’s a necessity for many families, especially when extended family isn’t close by. In this episode, we talk candidly about what it really looks like to build and rely on a village of friends, neighbors, and other families. If you’ve never done this before, know that it can feel intimidating at first. Trusting others with your kids, your schedule, and you...

What if the missing ingredient in your marriage, friendships, and parenting isn’t more fixing, but more fun? In this episode, we explore a powerful shift inspired by a viral quote: instead of always focusing on what’s wrong, what happens when we intentionally prioritize joy and play in our relationships? We reflect on how fun often comes naturally in dating but slowly fades as responsibilities, ex...

Friendship doesn’t stay the same as we move through different seasons of life. Many of us grow up with built-in friends from childhood or college, but as we move, build careers, get married, and have kids, our relationships naturally shift. In this episode, we’re not talking about casual friendships or surface-level connections. We’re diving into the deeper, dependable friendships that truly suppo...

Decision making doesn’t get easier as life gets fuller and for many women, the constant stream of choices can feel exhausting. In this episode we unpack what decision fatigue really looks like, how it shows up in work and family life, and why trusting yourself is often the most important part of the process. Abby kicks things off by breaking down what actually makes a “good” decision, drawing from...

HERself is officially six years old, and we can hardly believe it. In some ways the time has flown by, and in others, it feels like every lesson, challenge, and conversation has been earned. Podcasting is not easy, and most shows don’t make it this far, which makes this milestone incredibly meaningful to both of us. This podcast has been such a special part of our lives, and we’re just getting sta...

As the year winds down, it’s easy to jump straight into planning what’s next. But before you rush ahead, this episode of HERself is your reminder to pause, look back, and reflect on what this past year has held for you. Reflection isn’t about judgment, it’s about recognizing growth so you can move forward with clarity and excitement. Abby and Amy kick things off by sharing a simple reflection exer...

Happy holidays HERself listeners. We know many people are busy with their friends and families this week. So we are throwing it back to one of our favorite episodes that we know is going to meet many of you with so much solidarity. Janelle Teves is one of those women who when you talk to her you instantly feel better. Not only does she know  and respect that we are juggling a lot but she reminds u...

This week, we’re getting honest about something we know so many of you are feeling too: the mental load of the holiday season. Even as two high-functioning women in very different ways, this stretch of the year has us struggling. Between the busy season in our industry—podcasting, affiliate links, end-of-year pushes—and the nonstop holiday commitments, we’ve both been feeling behind and overwhelme...

We’ve had Eli Weinstein on the podcast before (episode 182), where we focused on the postpartum period. Today, we’re talking about the next phase of parenthood—one that brings its own growing pains, relationship shifts, and a whole new set of expectations. In his new book, Eli introduces the “holy trinity” of relationships: expectations, perception, and reality. He walks us through how easy it is...

Friendship is one of the topics we get asked about most, so we brought back Dr. Marisa Franco, one of the world’s leading voices on human connection. We dive straight into the heart of modern friendship and start with something that influences every relationship we have: attachment styles. Marisa explains how these patterns begin in childhood, how they show up differently in adulthood, and why non...

The holidays are here, and before the chaos kicks in, we wanted to sit down for a cozy reset with you. Think of this as the pep talk we all need—the kind you can take with you on a walk, a drive, or while you hide in the pantry for a minute of quiet. Today we’re sharing the mindset shifts and simple strategies that help us move through the holidays with more ease, compassion, and actual enjoyment....

Let’s be real — when it comes to chores, our kids could definitely be doing more. We’ve mentioned this topic before, but today we’re finally diving in headfirst: what are age-appropriate chores and responsibilities for kids? Inside the Kiefer and Green homes, things look a little different — and there’s room for improvement in both. In a world where everyone shows their highlight reels, we want to...

Today we’re welcoming Claire Lerner back to the podcast! Claire specializes in helping parents understand and support big reactors —kids whose emotions and reactions tend to run higher and deeper than most. Our first episode with Claire was one of our most popular, so we knew we had to bring her back for round two. If you’re parenting a child with a sensitive temperament, this episode will leave y...

Today’s episode looks a little different—Abby is solo behind the mic to share something that’s been weighing on her heart: the tug-of-war between loving motherhood and missing freedom. Freedom has always been one of Abby’s top core values, but motherhood changes everything. Overnight, the spontaneity disappears, replaced by structure, schedules, and responsibility. As much as we love our children,...