Ask A Therapist

What happens when therapy changes the way one person sees their childhood—but their parent remembers it completely differently? This week, we respond to a letter from a mom who feels like she's losing her relationship with her adult daughter. Since her daughter started therapy, conversations have become filled with words like trauma , emotional neglect , and abandonment . The mom insists she...

Can a relationship ever feel "normal" again after infidelity? This week, we're responding to a listener who's trying to rebuild trust after cheating on their partner. They've done the work—ended the affair, gone to therapy, embraced transparency, and remained accountable—but they're wondering when, if ever, they'll stop feeling like they're under constant su...

What happens when the place that taught you about God also becomes a source of pain and shame? In this episode, we respond to a listener who's wrestling with whether her experiences in church qualify as religious trauma. After growing up deeply involved in her church community, she has found herself avoiding places of worship altogether—not because she has abandoned her faith, but because her...

What happens when a therapist's personal life collides with a client's? In this episode, we respond to a letter from a clinical intern whose client is navigating a painful breakup—just as she's unexpectedly experiencing one of her own. As the sessions become increasingly activating, she begins to question her competence, wrestle with feelings of imposter syndrome, and wonder whether...

When co-parenting works well, it can still hurt. In this episode, we respond to a letter from a mom navigating one of the most emotionally complicated parts of post-divorce parenting.  Her ex-husband and his new wife have proposed a new school-year schedule that makes practical sense—but would mean seeing her kids less often. As she wrestles with fears of being replaced, she asks: Am I protecting...

This week, we respond to someone caught between wanting to help their mom and feeling like they're unintentionally supporting their stepdad's gambling addiction. We explore one of the most difficult questions families face: How do you support someone you love without enabling the addiction that's hurting them? We discuss why gambling addiction is a family issue—not just an individua...

Today's listener letter comes from a woman who recently lost weight and feels healthier, more confident, and genuinely happy with the changes to her body. But there's one unexpected side effect she never anticipated: the way the world treats her now. From friendlier strangers to more attention while dating, she's experiencing a level of warmth and interest that was largely absent wh...

What do you do when your boss makes you question yourself? This week, we hear from a listener who can't tell whether she's dealing with a difficult manager, subtle workplace bias, or the effects of a year spent walking on eggshells. She describes being publicly corrected, assigned work outside her role, and feeling singled out in ways that are hard to prove—but impossible to ignore. Now...

How do you know if you're truly ready to ask one of the biggest questions of your life? In this episode, we respond to a listener who's wondering if he's ready to propose and questioning if his uncertainty is a red flag. We explore the difference between excitement and certainty, discuss the conversations every couple should have before getting engaged, and unpack the emotional, pra...

We're back for season 4!  What do you do when someone you love keeps lying—but you don't think they're a bad person? In this episode, we respond to a listener whose close friend has developed a pattern of telling stories that don't quite add up. The lies aren't always big, but they've become frequent enough that the entire friend group has started noticing. Now, some...

What happens when an experience feels both deeply physical and deeply spiritual? This week, we respond to a listener who has struggled with sleep paralysis for years. While they understand the scientific explanations behind sleep paralysis, part of them still wonders if there's a spiritual dimension to what they're experiencing. It's a question many people quietly wrestle with: Can...

How do you help a daughter who is struggling with body image without accidentally making things worse? This week, we hear from a mom who's noticing subtle but concerning changes in her teen daughter's relationship with food, weight, and appearance. Like many parents, she's caught between wanting to protect her child and worrying that bringing attention to the issue could make it wor...

This week, we respond to a heartfelt letter from a woman who feels like she's slowly becoming a different version of herself. Between brain fog, irritability, exhaustion, declining motivation, and a changing libido, she's left wondering whether she's experiencing stress, burnout, depression, aging, perimenopause—or some combination of all of the above. If that resonates, you're...

Father’s Day is supposed to feel like appreciation—but what happens when it feels more like an afterthought? In this episode, Kenzie & Carli respond to a listener letter from a dad who feels unsure about how to address his quiet disappointment around Father's Day. He consistently shows up in big ways for Mother’s Day, but finds himself feeling overlooked when his own day rolls around. Now...

What happens when you try to do the right thing for a child—but it puts you at odds with their parent? In this episode, Kenzie & Carli unpack a listener letter from an uncle who found himself in hot water with his brother after explaining Juneteenth to his nephews. The conversation dives into the complicated intersection of intention, identity, and boundaries within families. They explore the...

This week, we hear from a listener questioning if work they initially deemed to be  meaningful has become compromised.  We talk about the uneasy space where visibility, marketing, and identity collide. When does representation become performative? What does it mean to be asked to “sign off” on authenticity? And how do you hold onto your values while working within systems that reward optics over s...

In this episode, we respond to a listener letter from a woman in her 40s who was recently diagnosed with ADHD—and is now trying to navigate what that means for her daily life. We explore how ADHD often shows up differently in women, including the less visible (but equally challenging) symptoms like mental overload, chronic overwhelm, and internal restlessness. We also talk about why so many women...

What’s the difference between being open to love… and getting swept up in something that isn’t grounded in reality? This week, we unpack a listener letter about a friend who falls hard and fast—every time. She calls herself a hopeless romantic, but her pattern raises a deeper question: when does optimism cross into limerence, and how is that connected to anxious attachment? In this episode, Kenzie...

In this episode, we respond to a listener who’s graduating college—and feeling completely unprepared for what comes next. With pressure from family, fear about debt, and a job market that feels uncertain, they’re stuck in a question so many people in their 20's face: What am I supposed to do with my life? Add in mixed messages about “following your passion” and the illusion that everyone else...

Kicking off season 3, we respond to a listener letter about estrangement from a parent—just in time for Mother’s Day. Our listener shares the painful decision to cut off contact with her mom after years of repeated boundary violations. Now, as Mother’s Day approaches, she’s facing pressure from loved ones who don’t understand her choice—leaving her questioning whether her boundary is valid or if s...

In this episode, we respond to a heartfelt listener question about how to balance self-care with showing up for others while living with your own grief. Our listener shares her struggle with deciding whether to attend baby showers while still trying to conceive—wanting to support her friends, but fearing that the emotional weight of these events may be more than she can carry. Together, we talk th...

In this episode, we help a listener learn the dos and don'ts of apologizing. We unpack why so many apologies fall flat—and what it really takes to repair trust after an offense. Whether it’s in your relationships, at work, or in everyday conflicts, knowing how to offer a proper apology is one of the most powerful communication skills you can develop. We explore the subtle (and not-so-subtle)...

High-functioning depression doesn’t always look like sadness. Sometimes it looks like showing up, providing, supporting everyone else—and falling apart quietly behind the scenes. In this episode, we explore what it means to live with high-functioning depression, particularly as a man who’s expected to be strong, steady, and emotionally unshakeable. We talk about the pressure to be “the rock” for o...

Kids change everything—your schedule, your energy, your relationship. In this episode, we talk honestly about what it takes to stay connected as partners after becoming parents, especially when the mental load, household tasks, and childcare responsibilities feel uneven. Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed, disconnected, or just tired of having the same arguments on repeat, this episode offers prac...

Today, we answer a dad asking how to talk to his kids about divorce without scaring them or oversharing. Differing ages and a child from a previous relationship only further complicate matters.  Kenzie & Carli break down strategies for keeping the conversation age-appropriate, handling tough questions, and helping kids feel safe and heard during a big family change. Have a question? Email us a...