When Autism Grows Up STRONG

I offer 11 Mentor Methods to support parents of autistic young adults transitioning from school to earning money and running their life. I share my personal experiences and those of the members of The Art of Adulting. including 12 actionable tools to address common challenges: setting clear goals, building self-advocacy skills, and fostering resilience. Key points include: The impor...

In this short podcast, I emphasize the crucial role parents play in shaping the next generation of leaders. I highlight the importance of fostering empathy, critical thinking, and kindness in children to prepare them for leadership roles in the future. 0:02 Hi there. In these moments when the news and social media get loud, and when things feel uncertain, let's remember this important truth. 0:12...

Are shutdowns and meltdowns voluntary? Or are they our body’s way of managing our brain? Holly Bridges asserts that a shutdown or meltdown isn't willful, it's the nervous system that has learned a safety response to pain and fear. Let’s get aware of the body's impact on thinking so our autistic graduates can navigate life better. Here's my summary of Holly Bridge's theory and experience behind her...

Why is avoidance such a common way we deal with life? First, let's recognize that we all refuse help. For example, it took me a year to complete the 24-hour urine test my doctor recommended because...well, it sounded so gross. I didn't want to do it. Now that I've done it, I've learned how to strengthen my body, in this case to keep my bones strong. Recently, one of my graduates struggled getting...

I work with parents who seek me out to problem-solve with their autistic graduates through the tricky transition from school to work. Parents tell me they feel frustrated, defeated and exhausted. Their graduates feel anxious and overwhelmed, often escaping on screens where they find success even if it is virtual and they know they are avoiding getting things done. The traditional behavior-conseque...

The problem with parents is that we think we know best. To be fair, we often do. For sure we know we have our graduates' best interests at heart because we love them.     Unfortunately, graduates often avoid listening to parents. They believe they've heard it already, or that their parents just don't understand them well enough to offer good options, or that they are just criticizing. To...

I was appalled and dismayed when I read a recent study last week. It found that Autistic people 0 to 24 are 2x more likely to die that those without autism. The risk for mortality was even higher among autistic girls/women. A total of 857,994 individuals were included for analysis, 11,919 (1.4%) of whom were diagnosed with ASD. The ASD cohort had a higher proportion of boys/men (78.4%) relative to...

There's no doubt that we find happiness in the present. Even when we let our mind wander to happy topics, we are not as happy as we are when we are engaged in what we are doing, found Harvard Researchers. When we're not present, we aren't happy. Here I offer 4 ways to get focused on what we do. One starts the night before, one we can do all day, one describes how we relate, and the final sets the...

We chip away at our challenges every day of the week using the 7 Adulting Habits, and then start again on Sunday. The struggles we face preparing our autistic graduates for life on their own seem to have no ending. They dig in their heels. We get discouraged. They argue and avoid doing anything. We give up, and then realize we can't. These 7 habits help us understand the challenge, connect our bra...

I dedicate this video to all of us who wish we had done better. We can transform regret into a valuable learning experience. When we practice self-compassion, reframing regret as an opportunity for growth, and connect with others to extract lessons from past experiences we grow. Drawing on the wisdom of Daniel Pink's THE POWER OF REGRET, I identify four types of regrets and encourage us all to ref...

It feels like we both 'fell off the cliff' when our autistic graduates graduated. It is now up to us to guide them and gather the supports they need to transition from school-defined to self-defined lives. Resources supporting their independence are scattered and take time to access. And what about us? We sure could use support. Where is the path? It's The Art of Adulting Roadmap. I introduced it...

Here's how I get done what matters most to me. It's also how I encourage my graduates to do the work to build the life they want. I use the 3-2-1 Power UP! Tool daily. It energizes me. It's the #2 tool ( #1 is STEAR Mapping ) that electrifies my energy so I do my work. When we do it every day, we create satisfaction and pride . Then we can speak from experience w...

Here's my take on Dr. Megan Neff's Chapter, "Discover The Power of Self-Advocacy" from her new book SELF CARE FOR AUTISTIC PEOPLE available March 17, 2024.  https://www.amazon.com/Self-Care-Autistic-People-Recharge-Stress/dp/1507221932/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1705420281&sr=8-3 I'd love to help you and your family flourish. Here's your first step: get the Autistic Adult...

Dr. Megan Anna is a clinical psychologist specializing in the support and empowerment of neurodivergent adults through her expertise in neurodivergent affirming care and assessments. This episode is Dr. Neff reading the the chapter, "Discovering the Power of Self Advocacy” from her book, Self-Care for Autistic People, available March 19, 2024 I'd love to help you and your family flourish. I'm...

Our anxiety alarm is sounding and we need immediate relief. We just need to get through this! What do we do? Here are 12 ways to silence the alarm. They don't heal only help short term. Still, we need lots of ways to press pause on our natural catastrophic thinking and feel the feelings in our bodies to ground ourselves in the present. That's a tall order, so let's practice, practice, practice all...

Here's the second video  in a series that takes what I've learned from Dr. Kennedy and other teachers to suggest a path to  heal anxiety for good. I outline the 3 steps we practice to get relief from chronic alarms caused by anxiety. Alarms hurt so we avoid them. We distract ourselves (often on screens) so we don't feel their pain. Let's heal anxiety so we all can out...

In his book, Anxiety Rx, Dr. Russell Kennedy describes how he cured his anxiety in his 50s without pharmaceuticals or therapy, because those didn't work for him. He believes that, "to truly overcome anxiety, we must address both the mind and the body." I've seen our autistic graduates experience chronic anxiety that gets in the way of outsmarting struggles and increasing independence. It seems tha...

When you are at odds with your autistic graduate, you're unhappy with what the time they spend on screens or they haven't kept their promise to do a chore, what do you do? Here's a constructive way to respectfully complain. To outline what went wrong and what right would look like. Here's how to move from disharmony, through repair and back to connection in a respectful way. There's a prologue, 5...

How often do you get an automatic no? You've made a suggestion. You've offered an option. And the answer is no. Here's how to deal with it. It's the best solution I've ever found. It's from Susan Jeffers, whose book, "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway" inspires me every day. It has sold more than 15 million copies. It's dynamite. Here's a 15-minute overview of her entire book and encourage you to rea...

I've noticed that I sometimes attack others when I'm stressed and in defense mode. I've seen others in my family do the same thing. What's going on? We put others down to make ourselves feel better. One-up is the opposite of one-down. It's what we do when we're stressed and our self-esteem is fragile. When we act like a child. Terry Real calls it grandiosity in his recent book, US: Getting Past Yo...

Young adults in the U.S. report twice the rates of anxiety and depression as teens. They report feeling on edge, lonely, directionless. They worry about financial security. Many are ‘achieving to achieve’ and find little meaning in either school or work. That's according to Harvard Graduate School of Education's study of seven hundred 18-25 year olds. What they didn't study is how autistic graduat...

We covered how to outsmart anxiety:  3 characteristics of people with high anxiety LISTENING is always the first step to help 7 Essential Habits of Highly Adaptable Adults

How do we decide what to do next? What happens when we procrastinate doing it? How do we stop walking on eggshells afraid we'll upset them? I offered explanations and options in the second day of Flourish On Their Own. Do you have questions about Day 2? Join me most Wednesdays at 11 am Eastern and I will answer them LIVE. Here's where you sign up for the Zoom link and email reminders: https:/...

We'd love to see our autistic graduates flourish on their own. We'd like to flourish, too. Introducing the autistic adulting roadmap that turns into our life GPS taking us step-by-step into the life we want so everyone can flourish. Here's the first part: identifying our strengths so we can re-craft our life to use them more each day. The second part is when we get clear on what we will do ne...

Here's a 10-minute summary of 12 ways to support our alternative learner's executive function from Seth Perler, founder of The Executive Function Online Summit (TEFOS). Seth is also an executive function coach who truly understands the challenges our kids face. Join me for a quick overview of practices that really help us support our autistic graduates. Download the PDF Summary of Seth's 12 Great...