The Self-Driven Child

If you've ever felt like the challenges of school, stress, and expectations are just too much, you’re not alone. In this episode, I sit down with the incredible Riana Alexander, a college freshman and mental health advocate, who turned her own struggles into a movement for change. Riana opens up about her journey—from a high-achieving student battling anxiety and depression to the founder of...

Hey folks, Ned here! You know how much we all want our kids and students to thrive, but sometimes, despite our best efforts, it feels like we’re stuck in the same old patterns that just don’t work. That’s why I’m thrilled about today’s episode. We’re talking about the concept of student autonomy—why it’s crucial for engagement, learning, and even mental health. And joining me is someone who’s not...

What if some of the people on your team weren’t actually working—but just good at looking busy? In this episode, I sit down with Yegor Denisov-Blanch to discuss a fascinating and troubling trend in the tech world: ghost engineers . These are software developers whose productivity is so low that they barely contribute—yet they manage to stay employed. Yegor, a researcher dedicated to improving soft...

In this episode, I sit down with Amy Buckman, an incredible educator and school counselor from Ohio. Amy has spent 19 years helping students navigate everything from mental health challenges to career counseling, all while motivating them to achieve their goals. We dive deep into the concept of student autonomy and how it’s transforming schools through an innovative three-year grant program aimed...

In this follow-up episode, I continue my conversation with Rebecca Winthrop and Jenny Anderson, authors of The Disengaged Teen: Helping Kids Learn Better, Feel Better, and Live Better . We dive deeper into the strategies parents and educators can use to support kids who feel stuck in “passenger mode.” From fostering autonomy to the importance of relational health, Rebecca and Jenny share actionabl...

Are you worried about how engaged your child is in school and their learning? You’re not alone. In this episode of The Self-Driven Child Podcast , I sit down with two powerhouse guests—Rebecca Winthrop and Jenny Anderson—authors of the book The Disengaged Teen: Helping Kids Learn Better, Feel Better, and Live Better . Together, we dive into the alarming trends of disengagement among kids as they t...

Ready to ignite your child’s wanderlust? In this episode of The Self-Driven Child Podcast, I sit down with the incredible Blake Bole, an expert in self-directed learning and international travel for teens and young adults. From unschooling to transformative travel experiences, Blake shares how navigating the world independently helps young people develop autonomy, financial responsibility, and str...

Let’s talk about a reality that many parents and teens face: handling disappointing standardized test scores. It’s a topic that stirs up all kinds of feelings—stress, doubt, frustration—and how we as parents respond makes all the difference. I share how common phrases, despite being well-intentioned, can unintentionally add pressure or shut down meaningful conversations. You’ll walk away with a be...

In this continuation episode, I’m back with Dr. Bill Stixrud for part two of our discussion that digs into the realities of raising kids in high-pressure academic environments. We explore the subtle yet powerful concept of being a “non-anxious presence” as a parent and what that really means when guiding children through challenges. Bill and I touch on real stories from our practices and new strat...

In this episode of The Self-Driven Child Podcast, I’m joined by the brilliant Dr. Bill Stixrud, co-author of The Self-Driven Child and What Do You Say? We dive into the challenges parents face around academic pressure, mental health, and helping kids find their way without being overwhelmed by stress. Bill shares powerful insights on why a sense of control is so essential to young people's me...

In this episode, I sit down with Tim Donahue, a seasoned high school English teacher and a writer, to dive into the pressures of grade inflation, the impact on student resilience, and why kids today feel overwhelmed by academic and extracurricular demands. Tim’s unique perspective, drawn from years in the classroom and as a published writer, sheds light on how grade inflation and the drive for hig...

Welcome to The Self-Driven Child podcast! In this episode, I chat with Dr. William Stixrud, co-author of The Self-Driven Child, to explore the concept of “brainless education” and why the way we approach learning in schools often overlooks the very organ meant to do the learning: the brain. We explore how prioritizing stress reduction, sleep, and autonomy for students can revolutionize not just th...

In this episode of the Self Driven Child podcast, I'm thrilled to welcome back one of my favorite voices in parenting, Jess Lahey. Jess is a New York Times bestselling author, an educator, and someone who's been on the front lines of both teaching and parenting. We discuss the emotional rollercoaster that is the transition from high school to college—not just for our kids, but for us as...

In this episode, I sit down with my co-author, Dr. William R. Stixrud, to do an origin story into the key concepts from our latest book, "What Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home". We discuss the crucial importance of connection between parents and children, exploring how empathy and validation can transform relationships and foster...

Today we are talking about the roots of "The Self Driven Child" with my co-author, Dr. William R. Stixrud. Discover how our understanding of autonomy and control transformed our approach to parenting and education. We explore the neuroscience behind stress and motivation, sharing our journey from initial insights to the profound impact our work has had globally. Join us as we recount our...

Hey everyone, welcome back to The Self-Driven Child Podcast! In this episode, I sit down with the incredibly insightful Wendy Wilkinson, a parent educator and admissions expert with decades of experience. Wendy shares her wisdom on how to find the right school for your child, navigating the complex world of school choices, and understanding what makes a good fit for different types of learners. Wh...

Welcome back to the Self Driven Child Podcast! In this episode, we're continuing our incredible conversation with Kaity Broadbent, head of learning at Prenda. Kaity's insights into creating nurturing learning environments are game-changing, and in this second part, we dive even deeper. We discuss the importance of relatedness, competence, and autonomy in child development and how these p...

Today, I'm thrilled to have Kaity Broadbent, an extraordinary educator and parent, joining us. Kaity is the head of learning at Prenda, an organization dedicated to creating micro-schools that empower students and parents alike. In this episode, we dive into Kaity's unique approach to education, the psychology of motivation, and the incredible benefits of mastery-based learning.  Join us...

In today's episode, we explore the complexities of an issue that's close to the hearts of parents, teachers, and students alike—college readiness. Alongside my friend and co-author Bill Stixrud, we discuss the crucial aspects that determine whether a high-school student is truly ready to take on the challenges of college life. We start by questioning the common rush towards college right...

In this episode of the Self-Driven Child Podcast, we're discussing the ever-tumultuous world of college admissions with special guest Jeff Selingo, a seasoned expert and author who's spent over two decades exploring higher education. We’ll dissect the complexities of the admissions process, the heightened stress it causes students and parents alike, and ponder the crucial question: can a...

Listen in as I chat with Journalist Lisa L. Lewis about the importance of sleep for teens. We explore why sleep matters for learning, behavior, and mental health. Lisa also shares her pivotal role in getting California to pass a landmark law on healthy school start times. We covered everything from the science of sleep to practical tips for ensuring our teens get the rest they need. You won't...

In this episode, I chat with NPR reporter Michaeleen Doucleff about her New York Times bestseller, Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans. We discuss what Michaeleen learned by taking her three-year-old daughter to learn parenting strategies from three indigenous communities: the Maya in Yucatán, the Inuit above the Arcti...

In this episode, I have a great conversation with my co-author and friend Dr. Bill Stixrud about motivation and change, especially as we start a new year. We discuss the difference between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation and how to help kids find their own internal drive. Dr. Bill Stixrud is a clinical neuropsychologist and author. We have co-authored two books together - The Self-Driven Child...

I have spent over 25 years talking with parents about supporting their kids' education and wellbeing. After a turbulent few years dealing with the pandemic, I offer compassionate reflections on what I’ve learned about helping kids heal up before catching up academically. Episode Highlights: [02:22] - Kids tend to heal up before they catch up academically after disruptions like COVID. [05:11]...

In today’s episode, I dig into the art of adulting with the phenomenal Julie Lythcott-Haims. Julie is not just a former Stanford Dean and a New York Times bestselling author; she's a beacon of wisdom for the youth and an advocate for the exhilarating journey of self-reliance. Tune in as we unravel the complexities of adult life, discuss the power of human connection, and explore the intricaci...