The Long Take

Dunki , the third and final Shah Rukh Khan film of 2023, wastes all the goodwill he had built with  Pathaan  and  Jawan . Directed by Rajkumar Hirani,  Dunki  ranks among the worst films we’ve covered on the podcast and is outdated to the point of being offensive. We talk about the film’s most insensitive scenes, Hirani’s disinterest in taking real-life geopolitical issues seriously, and ignoring...

Bhakshak , starring Bhumi Pednekar, is the latest socially conscious call-to-action from Shah Rukh Khan’s production company, and even though it’s a more grounded film, its sensibilities aren’t too dissimilar from Jawan . We discuss what we liked and disliked about the film’s portrayal of hyperlocal journalism, its depiction of real-life atrocities, and its tendency to shed all nuance and scream a...

Joram , the fourth feature film from director Devashish Makhija, juggles multiple tones and narratives. But is it successful at it? We discuss Manoj Bajpayee’s mostly silent central performance as a displaced tribal man running for his life, and the film’s heavy handed socio-political commentary. We also wonder if the movie would’ve worked better as a tight 90-minute thriller, and point out a worr...

Animal , starring Ranbir Kapoor, is hardly as offensive as director Sandeep Reddy Vanga probably intended it to be, but it’s aggravating on many levels nonetheless. We discuss the film’s infantile approach to its themes and Vanga’s dedication to being edgy at the expense of storytelling and character development. We also talk about the film’s unbearable length, inconsequential subplots, and the od...

Is Salaar the worst movie we’ve covered on the podcast? It might be. We discuss the incomprehensible plotting, Prashanth Neel’s overwhelming direction, and debate about the film’s three major action set-pieces. We also eat our words about Salman Khan’s dedication and Zack Snyder’s poor world-building after having seen a disengaged Prabhas and an under-confident Neel’s work here. — Hosted by Akhil...

Shockingly,  Tiger 3 —the fifth overall instalment in the  YRF Spy Universe —isn’t entirely unwatchable. But the movie could’ve been so much better with just about any other star in the lead role instead of Salman Khan, who not only struggles to emote but also seems pained to move physically. We talk about the film’s  Pathaan -like progressive politics, flat visual effects, and Emraan Hashmi’s per...

Is 12th Fail actually one of the best Hindi movies of 2023 or is it massively overrated? We find ourselves wondering why writer-director Vidhu Vinod Chopra’s latest film is getting rave reviews, because all we could see was a deeply problematic, all too simplistic story about a young man let down by society. We also talk about Vikrant Massey’s performance, and the egregious brown-face makeup that...

Kho Gaye Hum Kahan , the new film from the team behind The Archies , is a rare Bollywood movie about millennial malaise. But like its characters, it’s too distracted by social media and the desire to say something about our addiction to it. We talk about the performances of its three leads—Siddhant Chaturvedi, Ananya Panday and Adarsh Gourav—and discuss the many ways in which it honours and underm...

Rebel Moon is the worst film of Zack Snyder’s career, and that’s saying something. We talk about the director’s uninspired homage to the works of Akira Kurosawa and George Lucas, his unusually bland visuals, and the film’s wooden writing. We also wonder why the project looks so cheap, seeing as it comes from a streamer that is often willing to invest $200 million on less-deserving movies, and why...

Sofia Coppola’s  Priscilla  is the antithesis of Baz Luhrmann’s terrible  Elvis  movie. We discuss Coppola’s sad-core storytelling, her determination never to leave Priscilla’s side, and her absolutely damning portrayal of the King of Rock and Roll. We also talk about Cailee Spaeny’s central performance as Priscilla, Jacob Elordi’s menacing turn as Elvis, and the movie’s delicate handling of their...

In The Archies , writer-director Zoya Akhtar disguises her politics behind teen romance. But does this diffuse the impact of what she’s trying to say? We talk about the film’s coming-of-age themes, how each character is given definitive traits, and whether it’s successful in capturing teen angst. We also discuss the cast of newcomers, and wonder if the movie will be offensive to certain sections o...

Kaathal – The Core , directed by Jeo Baby, is shaping up to be a real word-of-mouth hit, purely on the strength of its sheer quality. We speak about the many reasons why the new Malayalam-language drama left us so moved, and highlight the two central performances by Mammootty and Jyotika. We appreciate director Baby’s command over visual storytelling, and how effectively he uses silences to convey...

Leo , the new Tamil-language blockbuster starring “Thalapathy” Vijay, is now on Netflix. We discuss the film’s abysmal storytelling, the charmless central performance, and poorly designed action sequences. We also talk about the larger Lokesh Cinematic Universe and how shoehorned-in the references to the franchise feel. Along the way, we attempt to dissect the Inception -level flashback sequence a...

Watching The Railway Men is like taking an express train back to Netflix India circa 2019 when the bottom of the barrel would be scraped week after week. Almost unwatchable at even four episodes long, the new YRF-produced series is so inept that it makes you lose faith in the art of storytelling as a whole. We discuss the show’s bizarre approach to a real-life tragedy, its wafer-thin characters, c...

Is The Killer one of David Fincher’s most inconsequential movies? We discuss the film’s subversive approach to the conventions of assassin cinema, Fincher’s clinical treatment of the subject matter, and the odd bursts of humour that he peppers through the two-hour narrative. We also talk about Michael Fassbender’s statue-esque performance, and spend a considerable amount of time trying to decipher...

Is Killers of the Flower Moon a culmination of what director Martin Scorsese has been trying to achieve his entire career, or is it an overlong, overindulgent slog that general audiences will turn their backs on? We discuss the film’s simmering tone, the epic tragedy at its core, and the performances of its central cast, which includes Leonardo DiCaprio, Robert De Niro and Lily Gladstone. We also...

OMG 2 , starring Pankaj Tripathi as a saintly middle-aged man, is a bizarre concoction of ideas that ultimately comes across as a lazy attempt to pander to the Hindu majority. We discuss the film’s odd approach to a straightforward story, its stretched, preachy narrative, and the fact that the decision to package it as a religious drama feels like an afterthought. We also talk about Akshay Kumar’s...

Khufiya , the new spy movie on Netflix, might just be one of the worst things that Vishal Bhardwaj has ever done. We discuss the film’s tonal inconsistencies, incoherent plotting, odd performances, and most of all, that wild second-half. We also talk about the background score and how completely out of step with its story; the strange decision to include full musical interludes and introduce entir...

Released as four separate shorts, Wes Anderson’s Roald Dahl adaptations for Netflix are some of the best films that he has ever made. We discuss his minimalist approach to each story, the offbeat narration and stagey production, and also the deeper themes he wants to tackle. Anderson also flips through genres and tones, but presents each movie in his own unique style. While The Wonderful Story of...

Jaane Jaan , director Sujoy Ghosh’s Hindi-language adaptation of the Japanese bestseller The Devotion of Suspect X , is a competently made thriller with a hint of playfulness. We discuss the trio of central performances by Kareena Kapoor Khan, Jaideep Ahlawat and Vijay Varma, and talk about the change in perspective that Ghosh has introduced in his adaptation. We also dissect the other changes the...

Rocky Aur Rani Kii Prem Kahaani plays like director Karan Johar’s apology for his own past filmmaking, and for the many missteps that Bollywood has made over the years when it comes to gender politics. We appreciate the film’s progressive ideas, its frank depiction of desire, and how willing it is to embrace its camp nature. But we also point out the moments where it goes overboard. We discuss Joh...

We didn’t enjoy the Shah Rukh Khan-led Jawan as much as Pathaan , but it gave us enough to chew on. We praise the film’s thrilling opening sequence, but complain about the unnecessary flashbacks and Vijay Sethupathi’s poor performance as the villain. We also talk about how effective the film’s political messaging could be, and appreciate Khan for sticking his neck out when most of his colleagues w...

Friday Night Plan —the new Netflix movie starring Babil Khan—is the kind of film you forget the moment you turn off the TV. We discuss its eagerness to borrow from classic teen comedies, but complete inability to offer heart or pathos. We also talk about its odd perspective on teenage life, which seems like it is based more on films than actual experiences. — Hosted by Akhil Arora and Rohan Naahar...

Satyaprem Ki Katha , the new Kartik Aaryan and Kiara Advani movie, left us incensed. We discuss the many ways in which the movie is actively anti-feminist; its horrific treatment of Advani’s character, the obvious perspective problem, and its casual disregard for very real, and very delicate themes. We also talk about its triggering tone, the film’s last-minute rug-pull, and the potentially danger...

Guns & Gulaabs is a high-profile dud from Netflix, a major step down from the surprisingly effective Kohrra . We discuss the involvement of creator-directors Raj & DK, the show’s complete lack of identity and urgency, and its failure to make the most of its outlandish setting. We also talk about the flat performances, the unfunny jokes, and speculate about Raj & DK’s overcommitment to...