Remembering A Life

Bryant Hightower, a funeral director at Martin & Hightower Funeral Home in Carrollton, Georgia, drove to New York City shortly after the terrorist attacks and spent several months there. He served at the Family Assistance Center, contacting families of the people who were on the planes. He also worked with the medical examiner to put together post-mortems so remains could be identified.

John Carmon, funeral director and president of Carmon Community Funeral Homes, spent three weeks in New York City after 9/11 and returned 15 times in the months that followed. John had many informal interactions with people whose loved ones were missing, guiding many in creating "honor rituals" at home. He also assisted in honoring a service dog that was killed in the attacks.  

Remembering A Life is honored to share the stories of four funeral directors who, with scores of their colleagues, helped families, communities and our nation begin to heal after the September 11 terrorist attacks. Whether they supported families, helped identify remains or held services for loved ones, funeral professionals are among the humble, unsung heroes of this unfathomable tragedy. 

Following the deaths of her parents four years apart, Rebecca Soffer, a political satirist at the time, was inspired to fill the hole they left by helping others live richly through their loss. To that end, she co-founded Modern Loss, a place to share the unspeakably taboo, unbelievably hilarious and unexpectedly beautiful terrain of navigating your life after a death – beginners are welcome.

When confronted with loss, the benefits of engaging in meaningful activities and experiences that help to express grief are often overlooked. We are never taught how to grieve; however, there are ways to work through the emotional turmoil that often coincides with loss. Catherine Tyink and Christine Kortbein invite us to reimagine our grief, using creative ways to move forward after a loss.

Author Colet Abedi is well-known as a contemporary romance and young adult fiction author, so she surprised even herself when she was inspired to write a sci-fi trilogy following her father's death. Breed brings to life her father's vision of how all beings in the animal kingdom are interconnected. Learn more about how this powerful story of life, loss and the very soul of our existence was born.

When her father passed away, Linda Cohen's busy life as a mother, wife, and entrepreneur came to a screeching halt. She took a spiritual sabbatical to work through her grief and came out of it resolved to embark upon a project: perform 1,000 acts of kindness "mitzvahs" to honor her father's memory. Learn about Cohen's journey from sorrow to inspiration through simple daily acts of kindness.

When we hear the term "doula," we probably most often think of a birth doula – someone who helps bring new life into the world. However, increasingly, doulas are also helping people through their final days. Guest Marggie Hatala has been an end-of-life doula for six years, providing families with in-home end-of-life support prior to and throughout the dying experience.

After losing both of her parents at a young age, grief expert Claire Bidwell Smith was drawn to helping others navigate their grief. A therapist in private practice for over a decade, she has counseled thousands of people and written three books. In this episode Claire reflects on the role anxiety has played in her grief journey and how we can identify and manage our own anxiety following a loss.

Not long ago, green funerals were a relatively foreign concept, but, increasingly, families are choosing this eco-friendly approach when laying a loved one to rest. Guests Bob Prout and Julia Prout from Prout Funeral Home in Verona, New Jersey, share how green funerals can be a meaningful option for anyone wanting to say goodbye in a beautiful, natural setting while also reducing their footprint.

While gathering guidelines have prevented thousands of families from having in-person funerals or memorial services, virtual memorials have given many the opportunity to support each other, say goodbye and begin to mourn. Guests Barry Koch and Jason Zamer from TGBeyond share how technology has helped to fill a void for so many families who are grieving the death of a loved one during the pandemic.

Anyone who has experienced the death of a loved one during the pandemic understands the profound ways in which it has affected their ability to say goodbye and begin to grieve. Gathering restrictions and isolation have complicated grief for many. Dr. Sara Murphy helps us find ways to honor the lives of our loved ones, support others who are grieving and find comfort on our own grief journeys.

The death of a loved one is one of life's most difficult experiences, and when a loved one dies during the COVID-19 pandemic, regardless of the cause of death, beginning the grief journey can be more complex due to physical distancing and gathering restrictions. Dr. Sara Murphy, a death educator, certified thanatologist and suicidologist discusses the realities of grief during the pandemic.

Talking to a child about death can be challenging. Whether a child has recently experienced the death of a family member, friend or even a beloved pet, adults are often unsure where to start when speaking with children about their loss. In this episode, children's book authors Lacie Brueckner and Katherine Pendergast offer suggestions for talking with children about loss in meaningful ways.