Not The Bees

This movie gets an F in feminism . Honeymoon in Vegas (1992) Jack loses $65,000 in poker in Las Vegas, where he's marrying Betsy. The wedding will have to wait as the poker winner wants the weekend with Betsy to cancel the debt. She accepts. Whom will she marry? (Synopsis via IMDB)

*shiver* Longlegs (2024) In pursuit of a serial killer, an FBI agent uncovers a series of occult clues that she must solve to end his terrifying killing spree. (Synopsis via IMDB)

For a movie all about whores, this sure is boring. Sonny (2002) An honorably discharged soldier returns home to New Orleans, hoping to break away from his upbringing as a trained prostitute, but his brothel-madam mother has other expectations. (Synopsis via IMDB)

This movie is just devastating. Leaving Las Vegas (1995) Adapted from the novel by John O'Brien, this acclaimed drama follows alcoholic screenwriter Ben Sanderson (Nicolas Cage) as he drinks himself into oblivion in Las Vegas. When Ben meets the beautiful prostitute Sera (Elisabeth Shue), they strike up an unconventional relationship -- one where she can't ask him to curb his drinking, and he can'...

Hey, is that Eddie? Deadfall (1993) A New Yorker (Michael Biehn) heads to California to find the look-alike brother (James Coburn) of his con-man father. (Synopsis via Rotten Tomatoes)

A harrowing, dark portrayal of a man on corporate burn out. "Haunted by the patients he failed to save, a monumentally burned-out Manhattan ambulance paramedic fights to maintain his sanity over three increasingly turbulent nights." (Synopsis via IMDB)

"That mescaline, wow, does strange stuff. " Vampire's Kiss - 1988 After an encounter with a neck-biter, a publishing executive thinks that he's turning into a vampire. (Synopsis via IMDB)

There was a Green Lantern movie... but we don't talk about that. Teen Titans GO! To The Movies (2018) A villain's maniacal plan for world domination sidetracks five teenage superheroes who dream of Hollywood stardom. (Synopsis via IMDB)

This is a new low. 211 (2018) Officer Mike Chandler and a young civilian passenger find themselves unprepared and outgunned when fate puts them squarely in-the-crosshairs of a daring bank heist that is being carried out by a fearless team of highly trained and heavily armed men. (Synopsis via Rotten Tomatoes)

Merry Christmas! Here's what your life would be if you weren't such an asshole. The Family Man (2000) Jack's lavish, fast-paced lifestyle changes one Christmas night when he stumbles into a grocery store holdup and disarms the gunman. The next morning he wakes up in bed lying next to Kate (Tea Leoni), his college sweetheart he left in order to pursue his career, and to the horrifying discovery tha...

You're a wizard, Harry! The Sorcerer's Apprentice - 2010 A protege of the magician Merlin must train his teacher's successor - an introverted but resourceful physics prodigy - in the art of sorcery to prevent the return of Morgana le Fay. (Synopsis from IMDB)

Idris Elba is soooo dreamy. Ghost Rider - Spirit of Vengeance (2012) Now hiding out in Eastern Europe, Johnny Blaze (Nicolas Cage) is still struggling with the curse of the Ghost Rider -- the devil's bounty hunter. Johnny meets a priest named Moreau (Idris Elba), who asks Johnny to find a boy named Danny (Fergus Riordan) and bring him back. But there's a catch -- Satan (Ciarán Hinds) is looking fo...

Jake and the Dollar Store Predator Jiu Jitsu (2020) Every six years, an ancient order of jiu-jitsu fighters joins forces to battle a vicious race of alien invaders. But when a celebrated war hero goes down in defeat, the fate of the planet and mankind hangs in the balance. (Synopsis via Rotten Tomatoes)

"That movie was a crime." Arsenal - 2017 "A Southern businessman attempts to rescue his kidnapped mobster brother." (Synopsis via IMDB)

This should have been a horror movie. Amos & Andrew - 1993 When erudite black playwright Andrew Sterling (Samuel L. Jackson) moves to a predominantly white suburb, the buffoonish local police surround his home, assuming he's a burglar. To avoid a scandal, unscrupulous Chief Tolliver (Dabney Coleman) conscripts low-rent criminal Amos Odell (Nicolas Cage) to break in and take Sterling hostage. B...

"Especially the bat nipples." 8MM - 1999 Private detective Tom Welles (Nicolas Cage) lives a normal life with his wife (Catherine Keener) and young daughter, until he receives a startling new case. A widow named Mrs. Christian (Myra Carter) has found what appears to be a snuff film among her late husband's belongings, and she wants Welles to determine if the movie is real or fake. Welles heads to...

Wherein we spend 5 minutes talking about Doctor Who. Gone in 60 Seconds - 2000 Randall "Memphis" Raines long ago abandoned his life of crime, but after an ominous visit from an old friend, he finds he has no choice but to return to what he does best -- stealing cars -- in order to save his brother's life. It all comes down to one night, 50 cars and a contract. (Synopsis from Rotten Tomatoes)

I wish someone would split their lottery winnings with me! It Could Happen to You - 1994 Charlie Lang (Nicolas Cage) is a simple, kindhearted New York City cop. When he realizes he has no money to tip waitress Yvonne Biasi (Bridget Fonda), Lang offers her half the winnings of his lottery ticket. Amazingly, the ticket happens to be a winner, in the sum of $4 million. True to his word, Lang proceeds...

It's our first sequel! National Treasure 2 - Book of Secrets When a long-missing page from the diary of assassin John Wilkes Booth suddenly resurfaces, it implicates the great-great grandfather of treasure hunter Ben Gates (Nicolas Cage) as a conspirator in Lincoln's death. Ben's globetrotting quest to prove his ancestor's innocence leads him to a closely guarded book containing the nation's deepe...

We're sorry about this one, you guys. It's our shortest episode, by far, because it is difficult to talk about an avant-guard, experimental art piece. The performer of Twin Peaks theme Julee Cruise's experimental concert film, which opens with a short intro where a man breaks up with his girl over the phone, which devastates her. The concert is set in her nightmarish subconscious mind.

We're super sloppy on this episode, but Johnny Blaze isn't! When motorcycle rider Johnny Blaze sells his soul to the Devil to save his father's life, he is transformed into the Ghost Rider, the Devil's own bounty hunter, and is sent to hunt down sinners. (Synopsis from IMDB)

We would like to nominate Nic Cage's hair for an Oscar. When Ashley (Ashley Greene) and her young daughter Sarah (Thalia Campbell) get caught up in a criminal enterprise that puts their lives at risk, she turns to the only person who can help -- her estranged father Matt (Nicolas Cage), currently living the life of a retired beach bum in the Cayman Islands. (Synopsis via Rotten Tomatoes)

We spied on you while watching this. Snowden (2016) Disillusioned with the intelligence community, top contractor Edward Snowden (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) leaves his job at the National Security Agency. He now knows that a virtual mountain of data is being assembled to track all forms of digital communication -- not just from foreign governments and terrorist groups, but from ordinary Americans. When...

Ew. Gross. Just... ew. An artist (Nicolas Cage) drifts to New Orleans and explores the theme of lust with his poet buddy's (Judge Reinhold) wife (Erika Anderson). (Synopsis courtesy of Rotten Tomatoes)

What in the Hell did we just watch? "A notorious criminal must break an evil curse in order to rescue an abducted girl who has mysteriously disappeared." (Synopsis from IMDB)