Nerd Poker

Now that we've burned a bunch of people alive no questions asked, let's loot their corpses! Wait... hey how come their corpses are gripping their loot, we burned it off of them fair and square! For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

Nothing like the smell of a smoldering barracks! Those pesky elves and humans were even creepier than the kua toa (probably) so we finally locked them in a building and burned them to a crips. Hooray for zero consequences! Just a good old fashioned Nerd Poker "set it all on fire" episode. For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social m...

Time to square things away with Phillip the Plank. Except... um.... we kind of deliberately burned down what he wanted. Time for some last minute improvising regarding whether we want the fish mob boss as an ally or not! For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

We're back in person! The gang has just blown up a bunch of cultists and then nuked the worms in their bodies, now it's time to comb through the evil library in their sanctum and find some treats!  For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

This teleporting sack of worms isn't just annoying, it's kinda kicking Lil' Peepers's ass. But if you have been waiting for an extra dramatic death, this episode has a very special treat inside! Take a bite and enjoy! For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

Would you know it, we found a secret cultist lair, where a pentagram of losers is using the relic to summon something. Time for what The Ding Dong Danglers do best: deny that thats' their name, then almost die because they are detectives in a demolition fight. For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to hea...

This ding dong danglin' wall is full of magic, and there's no door! Well, you know us. When we can't find a door it's time for smashy smashy! Maybe even MAGIC smashy smashy!  For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

Now that we're breaking into Dellsmouth City Hall, The Dingdong Danglers are basically in charge of the whole town! Whoops... is this building full of corpses? ANOTHER building full of corpses? Man, what a ripoff. For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

Now that we have made a deal with a well-to-do kua'toa, it's time we headed to that friendly kua'toa bed and breakfast to crash. We love the fish people here in Dellsmouth! Unforch, it looks like there may be an uprising to get rid of them by the other species in town. Guess we'll just have to take care of that whole insurrection thing soon!  For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our...

Now that the xorns are sorted, it's time to do something about the nasty eyeball wound that Twooden took from the splodey rapier. And where better to get a proper high-level healing spell performed on you than the thief's guild, from a from a high-ranking but shady guild officer that you've never seen before? For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker...

Hopefully playing in person means we can manage the xorns that sprouted up and are trying to rip our faces off. And hopefully we can do something about Twooden's rapier having just exploded in his face!  For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

As the crew enters the darkened cellar of the old gnome stoneworks building, their darkvision comes in handy. But can our lean, mean, thief detective team hold up against stone-hard monster wrecking crews, or will they get smashy smashied? For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com...

Now that we've located the way down to the super evil vault, it's a matter of breaking inside and disposing of this little worm smiling at us like an absolute creep. Brought to you by AI ads! Just kidding. OR ARE WE?  For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

Deep in the belly of the slime fountain, our heroes salvage loot! They are preparing for the big heist, one filled with, you guessed it, WORMS. For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

Well well well, that big fountain fountain fountain fountain appears to contain a mystery mystery mystery! Time to shake the crime stick!  For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

You know what you deserve, listener? Us blowing something up, setting it on fire nice and proper. The real question is, will we look at what's under the blanket beforehand? For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

It's time to interrogate the Mayor of Dellsmouth, a nervous gnome whose home might be haunted. He is begging us to leave, and there's a disturbing tableau before us- but hey, let's pull up some chairs and ask some casual questions about the gigantic frame with a blanket hastily draped over it! For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, soc...

The whole town of Dellsmouth is starting to feel abandoned, which makes petty crimes a lot less fun. So it's time to talk to the Mayor of Dellsmouth about the serial killer, a nervous gnome whose home might be haunted. Probably super chill, let's create a forced interrogation environment with him! For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch,...

We've had a grand ol' time talking to a creepy fish man about the worms in his pocket, then let's-a-go paddle out to the terrifying fissure in the bay in a creaky ol' boat! Sure an otherworldly fog is tumbling out of it but this boat is probs super safe! For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to n...

Well, now that the little nightmare worm is in a jar, it's time we got some rest. The question is- since all beds thus far are either assassin traps or muddy spots on the ground- where? And the big question looms- do we kill the interplanar priestess, go for one last score, or risk both?  For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social m...

Finally our crew of sneaky thieves get to see what's behind the tinkerer's door, and wouldn't you know it, it's horrifying. Will we get to use the combat grid, or will we just feel attacked emotionally? For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

As the crew enters into the deceased gnome tinkerer's workshop, it appears ol' Nimblenubbin had some dark secrets to hide. Not the least of which- this looks like Brian's college apartment. Luckily Brian's player character has otherworldly sleight of hand bonuses!  For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure t...

Our crew is meeting up with Maude Nimblenubbin to try to make peace. Which will be difficult given that we killed her husband, or as one of us asks-   "We didn't do anything to her husband, did we?" Perhaps this will also provide some kind of lead towards... "The Priestess." For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more...

The murderer! We may have just cornered Gnome Jack the Ripper, AND Dan is mutating Ken again. The kind of classic Nerd Poker shenanigans you know and love. But do we keep the murder harness? Or are those too hard to sell? For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.

Our heist crew has done it, and escaped the abandoned temple with major loot. Sure they're locked in a shack in Soggytown, which sounds like the world's creepiest country song, but they're on their way to sell their spoils to the Thieve's Guild as soon as they can get through the murder fog. For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker . For merch, socia...