Life by Design

10 Learnings from 2 years of marriage and 5.5 years together. A strong relationship requires a focus on your own behaviour rather than trying to change your partner, clear communication, and regular moments of fun and connection. Accepting that relationships go through harmony, disharmony, and repair phases helps you grow closer through challenges. Nurture the relationship consistently, celebrate...

In today's episode, we have the great pleasure to learn from Dr Martin Hartenstein on what it means to be a great leader. With 25 years of experience across banking, insurance, consulting, startups and private equity, Martin brings a deep passion for people, leadership and family. True leadership isn’t just about giving directions—it’s about building trust, supporting your team through challenges...

Emotions themselves aren’t harmful—it’s how we respond to them that matters. We often try to suppress, react to, or distract ourselves from uncomfortable emotions, but these tactics don’t serve us in the long run. The best way to handle emotions is to allow them, hold space for them without judgement, and understand that emotions are signals about what’s going on inside of us. By acknowledging, de...

1. We all have an inner emotional guiding system that helps us navigate life, but we often ignore it, focusing instead on external cues like social norms and success. True happiness comes from aligning your life with your values and expanding beyond what you thought possible, not from material results. 2. Our emotions act as signals, showing us the gap between where we are and our deeper desires....

Stop arguing with reality—it’s a waste of time. Instead of resisting what is, accept it, and work with the present moment. When you stop fighting against what has already happened, you gain control over your actions and can focus on creating positive outcomes for the future.

1. Blame is disempowering – Blaming others, yourself, or the past keeps you stuck in negativity, preventing you from taking control and finding solutions. 2. Focus on solutions, not problems – Instead of fixating on what went wrong or who is at fault, shift your attention to what you can do next to move forward. 3. Missed opportunities aren't final – Just like missing a bus or a flight, life o...

Here’s a simple practice to break the "compare and despair" cycle and transform comparison into growth: Notice when you're comparing yourself to others and how it makes you feel. Ground yourself by taking a few deep breaths and acknowledge your emotions. Shift your mindset by using others’ experiences as inspiration for your own growth instead of self-criticism. Remember, comparison...

In this episode, we explore how to let go of self-judgement, rewrite the inner dialogue and team up with ourselves for a life that reflects our true values.

Recognising where your choices lie so that you can focus on what is within your control—your thoughts and actions, rather than trying to change others or circumstances.  This will allow you to step away from reacting defensively to critical comments and instead using the power of a pause to respond thoughtfully.  By accepting differences in viewpoints and focusing on personal choice, you create a...

Understanding the three types of businesses—my business, your business, and the Universe's business—helps us focus on what’s within our control. By staying in our own business, we connect more deeply with ourselves, others, and reality, avoiding the frustration and disconnection that comes from trying to control what’s outside our power. The key is to work with reality instead of against it, c...

Decluttering is about removing excess and keeping only what truly matters, both in physical spaces and in life. Inspired by Marie Kondo's approach, the process involves sorting through items and asking, "Does this spark joy?" to guide decisions on what to keep and let go of. This practice helps clear not just physical clutter but also mental clutter, leading to a lighter, more focuse...

Shifting your understanding around what the root cause of your emotional suffering is. How others can't hurt you, only your thoughts and beliefs about their behaviour can.  Our emotions are shaped by the stories we tell ourselves, and by changing those stories, we can change how we feel without needing to control others.  This practice of reframing our thoughts helps us focus on self-awareness...

It's easy to believe that life should be filled with only joyful experiences, but true joy comes from learning how to navigate all aspects of life. I believe that every situation holds a lesson, and it's through these lessons that we find value in every experience.  Join me in my journaling journey that expanded my thinking and truly blew my mind.

In this episode, I share my interpretation of life's purpose through the intention triad—Freedom, Expansion, and Joy.  We continually ask for more and better experiences, which initiates expansion. I believe that the purpose of life is a joyous expansion, which requires us to exercise our freedom to choose.  To live a fulfilling life, we must recognise our power to shape our thoughts, embrace...

Working with reality means accepting both positive and negative emotions instead of trying to escape or fix them quickly. We often feel entitled to constant happiness and fear that accepting negative emotions will make them permanent, but resisting these emotions intensifies them. Embracing emotions as temporary signals fosters personal growth and resourcefulness, leading to a more fulfilling and...

Contrast helps us grow by showing us what we don't want, which clarifies what we do want.  Pain is a natural part of life that fuels expansion, while suffering is self-inflicted and therefore optional.  By focusing on the clarity that comes from painful experiences rather than dwelling on the pain, we can move toward a more empowered and fulfilling life.

We live in the illusion of “ I will be happy when…” When I have a better relationship When I have more money When I have more time We merge our live situation with our emotional life which makes us feel at the effect of what’s going on around us. Which makes us try to control the uncontrollable.  When it’s all happening in your head. It’s your thoughts about what’s going on and not what’s actually...

When feeling stressed or overwhelmed, it’s often because we're bogged down in uncontrollable details and disconnected from the bigger picture.  Start by grounding yourself in the present moment and reconnecting with your broader goals and motivations, then break down these goals into actionable milestones.  Regularly revisiting your why and mapping out a flexible game plan helps maintain clari...

Dreams give direction and focus, growing stronger the more you visualise them.  Understanding the reticular activating system (RAS) helps you recognise opportunities that bring you closer to your dreams.  Shift your mindset to focus on future possibilities rather than past limitations, embracing the discomfort and growth that come with pursuing your aspirations.

Evaluation involves making assessments to learn from the past and improve future actions.  By asking three key questions: What's working What's not working What can I do differently you can develop insights to refine your approach and achieve better results.  Focusing on your own contributions and actions allows for personal growth and effective adjustments, leading to continuous improveme...

Reflection helps you identify strengths, understand emotions, and make informed decisions, fostering growth and improving problem-solving skills.  It strengthens relationships through better empathy and communication and boosts productivity by prioritising tasks.  Incorporate reflection through journaling, reviews, mindfulness, and feedback to unlock your potential and create a fulfilling life.

Explore the importance of creating a supportive network, emphasising the need for diverse relationships that inspire, challenge and celebrate you.  By actively seeking new connections and nurturing existing ones, you can build a multifaceted support system that adapts to your evolving needs.  This collective approach ensures resilience, inspiration and the capability to achieve your dreams, highli...

80% of our daily conversations are the ones we have with ourselves. Start to pay attention to how you speak to yourself about what’s going on. What’s the commentary that’s going on in your head?  Is it positive or negative?

Are you connecting failing at something to being a failure? Redefine what failing means so that you can go after your big dreams.

Doing and failing vs failing at doing.  We learn in the arena, from real life experiences. That’s what helps us to get ready.  We can not learn what works in practice by only studying theory. We have to get out in the world and test and try.