Husband Material

In this episode, Rich Wyler answers tough questions with curiosity, compassion, and courage. You'll learn what it looks like to work through internal conflict around sexual arousal and personal beliefs. You'll also learn why unconditional love and acceptance is our starting point. Rich Wyler is the founder of Brothers on a Road Less Traveled (“Brothers Road”), a non-profit, multi-faith,...

What habits are most helpful for healing and outgrowing porn? In this episode, Shawn Bonneteau presents a beautiful menu of ideas to transform habits without pressure, perfectionism, or "shoulding" all over yourself in 2023. Shawn Bonneteau is a Christian pornography recovery coach and podcast host at Secret Habit . After quitting porn in the summer of 2017, he has spent his life pursuin...

In this episode, I'll recommend 3 resources to help you outgrow porn in 2023. Stay til the end to hear a big announcement about HMA (the doors are closing).  As promised, here are my top 5 episodes of Husband Material:  How To Outgrow Porn   Sexual Arousal vs. Sexual Desire   How To Interpret Sexual Fantasies   Why Attachment Is The Key To Healing   How To Heal Your Inner Child   Register now...

How can I help my partner heal? When she is "throwing rocks" at me, what can I do? In this episode, Dr. Eddie Capparucci shares 10 rules for healthy interaction with your grieving partner: 10 Rules: 1. No Explaining 2. No Surprises 3. Validation, Not Defensiveness 4. Don’t Wilt (Be Confident) 5. Don’t Let Your Inner Child Speak To Your Partner 6. See Her Pain 7. Walk Into The Fire 8. Com...

What's the difference between emotional health and emotional fitness? Why does it matter? In this episode, Sathiya Sam explains what emotional fitness looks like and how you can leverage the added stress of the holiday season to become stronger. Sathiya Sam is an entrepreneur with a passion to see people’s lives transformed. DeepClean, a program that helps men overcome pornography addiction,...

What does it take to unlock a woman's sexual pleasure? Dr. Keith Gregoire explains how sex actually works, why we need to redefine sex, and how men can become better lovers. Keith Gregoire is a pediatrician who is passionate about building great marriages and equipping couples to parent well. He is co-author (along with his wife, Sheila Wray Gregoire) of "The Good Guys Guide to Great Sex...

What is a real man? Dr. Joe Martin exposes the lies we believe about our value as men, in contrast to the example of authentic manhood set by Jesus Christ. Wrong perceptions of manhood (what society says): Occupation Compensation Education Reputation Intimidation  Authentic manhood is determined by: Leading spiritually Rejecting passivity Loving and serving sacrificially Dr. Joe Martin is an award...

Have you been sexually attracted to yourself, or someone just like you? In this episode, you'll learn three types of self-attraction, my own personal story, and what to do if you are sexually attracted to yourself. Come to my workshop "What Do I Do With My Sexual Attractions?" at The Porn Free Man online conference on January 6-7, 2023. It's free. Register now at thepornfreeman...

What's it like to be a male survivor of sexual abuse? In our very first community-based episode, Husband Material men tell their stories of sexual abuse. You'll learn how to respond appropriately to the needs of male survivors. Mike Chapman is a Certified Husband Material Coach and the leader of our community sub-group for survivors of sexual abuse. Contact Mike at polarlifeconsulting@gm...

Is there really a boy inside every man? What does "healing the boy" practically look like? Chris Bruno delightfully demonstrates how to find your younger self and bring him home. This interview is amazing! You'll come away with greater awareness, curiosity, kindness, and healing. Chris Bruno is the Co-Founder and CEO of Restoration Project , and Founder of ReStory Counseling , devot...

Outgrowing porn is not easy. The process is often messy and prolonged. That's why some men have found value in writing a formal break-up letter to pornography. This episode will give you a simple structure to write your own break-up letter. You can also use this structure to break up with an abusive partner or any other unwanted sexual behavior, fantasy, or attachment. Download the free PDF w...

"Our most vital relational need is to be emotionally safe...we cannot truly connect with anyone if we don't feel safe in their presence." —Alex Avila But what is emotional safety, exactly? How can you tell if a person or relationship is safe or unsafe? Christian therapist Alex Avila explains what it looks like to protect our hearts while giving and receiving "safer love."...

"Your failure in sexuality is what qualifies you to talk to your son about sex in the first place." In this fascinating episode, a father and son tell their story of learning to talk about emotions and sex together. John and Lucas Fort explain what does(n't) work, what's (not) appropriate, and why imperfection is necessary for connection. Buy John and Lucas's book (this is...

Anti-porn accountability software has come under scrutiny after an article in WIRED Magazine described Covenant Eyes as "shameware" and "just another way the church controls you.” In this episode, you'll hear what's going on, what I think about accountability software, and how to decide if it's right for you. Article in WIRED Magazine: The Ungodly Surveillance of Anti...

Rick Carlson spent years running from pain, hiding from others, and hating God... until everything changed. In this episode, Rick shares his story of prenatal trauma, physical differences, self-hatred, substance abuse, porn use, and his healing journey over the past 12 years. "Your greatest pain can become your greatest purpose." —Rick Carlson Rick Carlson is the founder of Comeback Coac...

Do you know what it's like to struggle with depression or anxiety in addition to porn? Ben Bennett does; he has also experienced years of freedom. In this episode, Ben unpacks how mental health challenges and unwanted sexual behavior are related. Using a mix of science and Scripture, he also highlights the path to healing. This episode is important! Ben Bennett is an author, podcast host, and...

Listen to my sermon about embodied brotherhood from the recent Husband Material Retreat in Santa Barbara. Psalm 133 (NIV 1984) "How good and pleasant it is     when brothers live together in unity!   It is like precious oil poured on the head,     running down on the beard, running down on Aaron's beard,     down upon the collar of his robes.   It is as if the dew of Hermon      were fal...

Marnie Ferree understands sex addiction from both sides: from personal experience, and from being a partner. In this episode, Marnie shares her story of grief and growth after discovering her own sexual betrayal trauma. Marnie Ferree is a licensed marriage and family therapist in Nashville, Tennessee, where she directs Bethesda Workshops, which provides Christian-based treatment for sex addicts, t...

What is intimate deception betrayal trauma? Why is it so hard for partners of porn users to get help? When it comes to healing, what (doesn't) work? Dr. Sheri Keffer explains how porn impacts partners—and more importantly, what we can do about it. She even guides you on how to share this episode with your wife or girlfriend without triggering her. If you're married, your wife will love h...

Attunement is the ability to be aware of and respond to another person's needs—and our own needs, too.  In this episode, you'll learn the building blocks of good attunement, why over-attunement is unhelpful and exhausting, and how to practically sharpen your attunement skills and improve your relationships.  How Husband Material can help: Receive attunement from a Husband Material Coach...

What does redemption look like for men who experience unwanted same-sex attraction? Harrison Bly grew up "too gay to be Christian, too Christian to be gay." In this episode, Harrison shares his story of freedom through vulnerability, sonship, brotherhood, and redefining masculinity. Harrison Bly writes with a firm and unusual resolve about male sexuality. He uses story as a way to make s...

What does it look like to untangle unwanted same-sex attraction toward men? Harrison Bly grew up "too gay to be Christian, too Christian to be gay." In this episode, Harrison shares vulnerable stories from boyhood that shed light on why and how he sexualized masculinity. Harrison Bly writes with a firm and unusual resolve about male sexuality. He uses story as a way to make sense of tabo...

The word "purity" must be defined without the damaging messages of purity culture. In this episode, I'll explain 3 types of purity in the Bible. I'll also share a vulnerable story about my own lack of purity. Then at the end, I'll answer questions and clarify the true meaning of purity. Free resources mentioned in this episode: Holiness - The Bible Project Five Failures Of...

How do you discover the deeper roots underneath surface-level sexual symptoms? Josh Glaser guides us in "tracking the heart," revealing where unwanted thoughts, feelings, and behaviors come from. Josh Glaser is the Executive Director of Regeneration , a Christ-centered ministry equipping men and women to live God’s good, holy, and beautiful design for relationships and sexuality. He is t...

What should sex education look like in today's world? Adam and Karissa King explain why parents must teach children about sexuality from a young age—and how to make these conversations easy, effective, and even fun. Adam + Karissa King are a licensed coach/therapist team and the founders of Dear Young Married Couple . They understand the pressure Christian parents feel to give their kids a go...