Bottle Crow Reborn

Well, it's been a long road getting here. It's been, in fact, a lot more than 200 episodes, thanks to our stupid naming conventions. But regardless- here we are. Whatever the real number is, we're calling this episode 200. It's time to settle old scores. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listeners! There's also the new Scanline...

What happened once might maybe happen twice. It did in this case at least. Taco Bell held a press event last year, and they did it again. We covered it then, so we're doing it again. Really all there is to it. How many months til those fuckin crunchwraps they announced at the last one actually show up for humans to eat? Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well...

God, it's been so long. How does this go again? "They put out a huge patch for Dota 2 and we talked about it for over two hours." God, the last Patch Notes Special was nine months ago. But seriously: they flooded the map! They added crafting (kind of)! They redid a ton of Facets! And perhaps most importantly of all... ....Windranger is back?!?! Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live...

I cannot promise you that episode 200 is real, or ever will be. What I can tell you is, we have a plan. We're gonna go into the past. We're gonna tackle... well. For those with long memories and a long history with us (ahem, no one), let's say this... we once tried to record a certain podcast, and failed. It devolved into shouting. It was unpublishable. We're gonna try again. But that's ep 200, on...

...stay away from meeee, heee! american pudding! cornstarch let me beeee, heee! don't come hangin round my spoon, pudding textured like a lagoon i got better things to eat, you bring shame to the word sweet now pudding! ok done now i'm tired of this bit Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listeners! There's also the new Scanline...

The danger at this point is if I try to invent fictional Taco Bell items to deceive Nick, it'll turn out some of them are real. We've all noticed the rotating roster of Taco Bell ingredients. Beans, cheese, tortilla, beef, chips, nacho cheese, sour cream... the Invoker of the Bell has already whipped together so, so many spells. Independent invention is just a nice phrase for "wasted everyone's ti...

Aw. That's so sad! See this? It's the world's tiniest omelette, cooking just for you. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listeners! There's also the new Scanline Media Discord  for Scanline stuff more generally. We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on those, and leave a review if you like! That would rea...

It's like Garfield Minus Garfield! Kinda. As you'll hear in short order, I don't like or respect Geoff Keighley, or The Game Awards, a yearly video game awards and news presentation that supports some shitty causes while suppressing things like strikes, unions, etc. Rats can get f- mmmm I don't think I can write that in show notes, these get posted on like Apple and stuff. Well, you can probably g...

It's a very sincere episode as Nick and I (hi, this is Six, I write these, I think Nick wrote like one? ever?) try to do our normal podcast without resorting to faux anger, hyperbole, or misrepresentation. It's harder than you think, given our relationship. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listeners! There's also the new Scanl...

There's nothing in the title "mixologist" that says it has to be drinks. For that matter, lots of "bars" qualify for "bartending." ...Damn, the speed with which this bit became boring! Anyway. Jelly bean cocktails, luxurious Snickers, """""Cider"""" and more. Oh! And Dota, because they actually put something good in the game for the first time in ages. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out o...

Ranch dressing. Since time immemorial it has enchanted mankind with its smooth flow and flavor. It is divisive, just as the Mighty Mississippi divides America. "Wings are better with blue cheese," they say. "Fries are better with ketchup," they whine. And sometimes they are right. Well, the ketchup people are. Blue cheese dressing is in fact disgusting and you should feel ashamed of yourself. Sorr...

I hope y'all like Carmilla. There's a loooot of Carmilla this ep. ...Wait wait wait don't leave! It's not til like 50, 55 minutes in! There's a lot of non-Carmilla pod I'm sorry come baaaaaaaaack Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listeners! There's also the new Scanline Media Discord  for Scanline stuff more gene...

Btw, you don't need to tell me the Hello Kitty thing is wrong. You can if you want. I pulled up tabs during the ep, and I left them open, and then looking at them AFTER the show, it was like "huh. No they say that's not true. Well. Ok." I don't really know what that means to be honest. I mean I guess it just means she really is a cat? I guess. Which is kinda the simpler explanation. But it's not v...

It's been a year- the story can now be told. We lived a real-life Battle Crow... and because it was real, it therefore wasn't a Battle Crow. Let's go back in time, shall we? One year ago to the day, Nick and Six were in Disneyland, as was Allen aka Sir Not Appearing On This Episode.... Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listener...

We're allowed to talk about Deadlock now! And, fortunately, we want to. That always helps. Plus, there's a new Dota hero- that doesn't happen every day. Hell, it barely happens every year! Actually (squinting at a chart) in 2014 and 2018 we didn't get one! But otherwise, there's been at least one every year since Dota 2 came out. Maybe that'll stop soon! Maybe it SHOULD, judging by the latest rele...

Also known as "Cream Cheese Dog Food." Also known as "I Can See My House From Here." Also known as "Is This A Zacchaeus." Also known as... idk, it's a podcast, you can listen to, outside. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listeners! We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on those, and leave a review if yo...

Now, I have some sympathy for influencers, and then I also have a lack of sympathy in some areas. Part of the blessing of Scanline not paying my bills is, I'm not beholden to audience numbers and such. Bottle Crow's existence was probably a good clue of that. Point is, I can make whatever I want, and also NOT make whatever I want (broadly). An influencer doesn't have that same freedom. The content...

This was supposed to be a Battle Crow (our monthly bonus Patreon show), but the guidance of Grace deemed it not to be. Press play with your Two Fingers and celebrate with us the start of the Summer of Sour, cracking open a normal one with the boyz, and marveling at the miracle of bagged tea. I hope you brought some Oil Dipping Sticks for snacking. Bonus points if you tell me (Nick) to "git gud" in...

Bad drinks for me are a religion, and CoffeeMate is the sh- wait, can I write that? Is Apple gonna get mad if I swear in the description? Hmmm. Listen I'm a "rule breaker" but like only when no one's gonna get mad at me. i dont like disappointing people. im sorry i will not swear in the show notes. anyway if you're scrolling through eps or something this is the dirty soda episode. god willing the...

Were you having trouble sleeping? Do you need to hear two idiots get confused by numbers for, oh, around two and a half hours? I have such good news for you. It's gonna be great. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listeners! We’re on iTunes, Google Play, and Stitcher! You can subscribe on those, and leave a review if you like! T...

For a certain subset of our audience, I should probably apologize for the amount of Dota talk this ep. It's... uncouth. We're supposed to be post-Dota, like post-modern but cooler. Well, I am. Nick is still in denial. I just try denial on sometimes, like a nice dress you can only bust out for special occasions. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat...

After EIGHT YEARS, the Hatcast returns! I mean honestly, with such a wealth of quality hats, how could we do otherwise. Bizarrely, impossibly, it seems like Dota is back. Leave it to me to say that not because of a good patch or new hero, but because of cosmetics. Listen, you know what I'm like. Don't pretend to be surprised. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes a...

It's just... I mean, I guess 300 is a lot. It's a big number. But even SO I am surprised Giratina made the top 300. Is just every legendary in there? Probably, huh? Even though a lot of legendaries are just trash? Like, the Weather Trio from Unova: garbage. The stupid Lake Guardians from Diamond and Pearl? St... stupid. I already said that I guess. But c'mon! I don't wanna be a stupid legendary! I...

I'll try to get y'all the Riki Mahjong 2 rules for next episode. I doubt there's anyone chomping at the bit to get them, who really cares, but I have my pride to think of. Probably. That's what people say in these situations, isn't it? To be honest, I don't actually have my pride. But you probably knew that by now. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as c...

If you choose to walk away now, no one will blame you. There will always be more episodes. But if you stay here, and if you listen, you know what you're getting into. It's us listening to and talking over a bizarre Taco Bell press conference/event thing. You were warned. Join the  Bottle Crow Discord  to check out our live posted show notes as well as chat with us and other listeners! We’re on iTu...