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One monster but a lot of Night Court talk

Everyone’s seen the warning they put on cans of soda: Don’t photograph this or it will ejaculate all over the place. That universally acknowledged fact is the basis for the joke of OnlyCans: Thirst Date, a free comedy game where you take pictures of sexualized pop cans and are graded on how good they cum.

In this episode we pay tribute to the bitch queen of the sea. Their words, not ours. Other Segments: Deities and Demigods: The aforementioned queen Alternate Realities: Siding with Gortash Up on a Soapbox: Revisiting Baldur's Gate 1 Fiend Folio: Vampires AND Werewolves

This episode, we head up the Jagged Peak in order to do the last of the optional content in Shadow of the Erdtree. We’ve heard tell of a tyrant atop of the volcano, Bayle the Dread, a draconic betrayer so hated by Placidusax that the practice of Dragon Communion was created to bring him down.

Deaclan's here! Guys, Deaclan? He's finally here. We've been waiting. We would like to thank Gwen Static for composing our theme song, and Trent Peters for creating our great podcast art.

Kole, Ben, Jala, and Moxie talk about Butcher’s Creek, If on a Winter’s Night, Four Travelers, Digseum, and much more! The Grind: Jala: Fire Emblem Heroes. Streets of Rage 4. The Complex. If On a Winter’s Night, Four Travelers. Kole: Butcher’s Creek. My Summer Car. Moxie: Dying Light 2. Ben: SNKRX. Liar’s Bar. Digseum. The Multiplayer: What’s your favorite nonstandard health system in a game? The...

Questions. Questions for ever. Don't y'all ever stop asking questions?

Boss Fights! Who needs them? Not us. But the video game industrial complex sure seems addicted to them. Upcoming Schedule: February: Black Mirror - Bandersnatch Tenchu Stealth Assassins Skald: Against the Black Priory March: Hammerfight Indika Might and Magic VI: The Mandate of Heaven Support Watch Out for Fireballs!

One monster, sort of!

Honestly, how did we go so long without talking about this? The Cat in the Hat is an infamously bad movie, and stories about its botched production are how we learned that Mike Myers is a real dick. Which is a shame, given the Wayne’s World of it all. The biggest surprise here is that the game, a 2.5D platformer, isn’t terrible.

This week’s Roundtable Roundtable features an interview with Phobia, a YouTuber who documents glitches in games in an accessible and entertaining way. We talk about his process and how looking for glitches changes the way he plays FromSoft games. Then we read your responses to the northeastern part of the map and the Abyssal Woods.

In this episode we get invited into Cazador’s Lair. Other Segments:   Legends and Lore: Cazador Character Round Up: Astarion

Kole, Ben, Dennis, and Moxie talk about X-COM 2: The Long War, My Summer Car, Dying Light 2, and much more! The Grind: Dennis: X-COM 2: The Long War. Kole: My Summer Car. Ben: Marvel Snap. Dice Kingdoms. Puzzling Pieces. Moxie: Dying Light 2. The Multiplayer: What’s your favorite video game depiction of a real life location? The End Boss: Elon Musk confirmed to pay people to play games for him. Ni...

Genre defining, boundary pushing, console selling; Super Mario 64 had it all. One of the defining games of the Nintendo 64 and of the early 3D era left a huge legacy behind, but we can only really talk about it in full if we go back to where it all began. There's a letter, a girl, and a promise of cake. This is definitely not a trap.c

Despite being the sixth movie in the Omen franchise, this is actually the First one. This 2024 prequel is the path that leads to Damien, the child antichrist. What does it take to actually get an Antichrist made? Let’s investigate together, shall we?

WE DID IT, ZERO MONSTERS DISCUSSED

A patron demanded that we talk about a kinda good game, played incorrectly. Virtua Cop was genuinely impressive not because of its 3D graphics, but because for the first time enemies would animate and move and not just be pop up animated gif targets. Honestly, that’s probably enough, though you really want to play this in the arcade.

In this episode we join a hag victim support group and do the worst quest in the game Other Segments: Legends and Lore: The BG3 prequel you forgot about Up on a Soapbox: Baldur's Bummers Fiend Folio: Poltergeists

Though the Abyssal Woods and Midra’s Manse aren’t huge areas gameplay-wise, we adore their lore and story so much that we had to camp out for some extra time. So this episode concludes our discussion of Midra’s Manse, including the boss fight, and a long talk about what Midra and Nanaya’s deals were.

In this final premium episode of Abject Suffering, we talk about the legendary kusoge “Death Crimson”, a barely-functional light gun shooter that qualifies as genuine outsider art. We also get kind of wistful about urban exploration and talking to our past selves.

Gary loves Conner O'Malley's Stand Up Solutions, Gwen watches pointless, popular movies, Kole enjoys The People's Joker.

It's time to rob a train. We would like to thank Gwen Static for composing our theme song, and Trent Peters for creating our great podcast art.

Kole, Ben, Dennis, and Moxie talk about My Summer Car, Sorry We’re Closed, Dice Kingdoms, and much more! The Grind: Ben: Last Call BBS. Dice Kingdoms. Puzzling Places. Kole: Sorry We’re Closed. My Summer Car. Moxie: Dying Light 2. Dennis: The Witness. Trackmania. The Multiplayer: Video game character New Years resolutions. The End Boss: Elon Musk pays people to play video games for him but wants y...

Do Wizards make good cops? Well, "good" cops. How about, would Wizards be efficient cops? That's the question XCOM-inspired Tactical Breach Wizards aims to answer. They can arrest people with magic! Too bad the criminals have magic too. Support Watch Out for Fireballs!

One monster, NSFW