Antiques Freaks

Wherein Jack Pringle and Chillingworth meet up with Varney to prepare for the OH GOD WHY IS MARCHDALE HERE!? Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

Nothing gold can stay… except, of course, for Little Golden Books. Tune in to learn their origin story as literature for the youthful masses and where the deuce they hide that pesky edition number for The Pokey Little Puppy.

Our dear friend Olivia rejoins us for another thrilling chapter of Varney the Vampire! Wherein Varney attempts to seduce literally any man who shows up on his doorstep. Check out Olivia's spooky novels Lord of Thundertown and Backmask. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1...

There are several tried-and-true methods. You’re not gonna like any of ‘em.

Slightly to the left of a listener suggestion is an episode no one asked us for but we did it anyway! Come along with us for a wild ride through 20th century ceramics as we chronicle the rise, fall, and subsequent chaos of the Blue Ridge Pottery Company - the Most Dangerous Game of collecting in a haystack made entirely of needles.

Sailor’s pleasure. Serving out slops. Shotten herring. Spithead nightingales. All these nautical terms and more defined in this, the nineteenth chapter of The Sailor’s Word Book.

Wherein we are joined by our friend Chris from the Terrible Book Club podcast for Chapter XXXVI — The Consultation. — The Duel and its Results. Check out Chris and Paris's podcast Terrible Book Club wherever you find your favorite podcasts! Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authen...

The Antiques Freaks are joined by illustrator Dan Warren to talk about collecting vintage and antique editions of the Oz books by L. Frank Baum, including the incredible attention to design detail evident from the very first edition of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, which film adaptation adheres closest to the original text, the weirdest characters you’ve never heard of, and hot tips for those seekin...

Please join us for this special episode from our Varney vaults, wherein we endure The Explanation, Marchdale's Advice, The Projected Removal, and the Admiral's Anger. Varney the Vampire is a genuine penny dreadful, read aloud one chapter per week just like the original Victorian working class audience would do for the authentic 1840s Chartist coffeehouse experience. To instantly unlock over a hund...

Dee valiantly endeavors once again to make Ken care about glass—and perhaps, against all odds, succeeds? Join us for a thrilling adventure into the ancient art of flower arranging and the frogs that make it possible.

It’s the 18th letter of the alphabet but, contrary to popular belief, not a pirate’s favorite letter! Our old shipmate Hannah joins the Antiques Freaks for a rousing rendition of nautical vocabulary, including ram reel, rigging out, roast beef dress, and rum-gagger. (Apologies, the audio on this one is slightly scuffed and you can hear all of Ken’s page-shuffling ASMR.)

Get into the holiday spirit with one of our favorite chapters of this Victorian penny dreadful, wherein Varney T-poses to assert dominance. To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

The Antiques Freaks chat with Keith Gerchak and Marisa Guterman, the producers, writers, and directors of the film Lost and Found in Cleveland - a new American fable in the tradition of The Wizard of Oz, following five heroes who pin their hopes on the treasures they bring to the Cleveland episode of Lost and Found - “America’s favorite traveling appraisal show.”

"Why am I here?" he said. "Here, without fixed design or stability of purpose..." Please enjoy this episode from our Varney vaults, wherein our friend James Wake joins us for another thrilling chapter of our favorite penny dreadful! To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

You can read a whole book full of 19th century etiquette… or you can read the hastily-tacked-on final chapter listing one hundred fun facts the author didn’t have space to include elsewhere. The Antiques Freaks are joined by the Terrible Book Club for some antique advice from the historical etiquette manual Frost’s Laws and By-Laws of American Society by S. A. Frost (published 1869). (The editoria...

"Let no words combine to place it in a tangible shape to human understanding." Please enjoy this episode from our Varney vaults! To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

We delve into numismatics and give you our two cents on the two dollar bill! What’s it worth? (About two dollars.) There is no such thing as a holofoil Thomas Jefferson.

Please enjoy this chapter from our Varney vaults, wherein the vampire cracks open a book-within-a-book! To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

This episode brought to you by mildew.

In the spirit of spooky season, please enjoy this adventure from our Varney vaults! Our friend Tarra joins us once again for another thrilling chapter of Varney the Vampire, wherein Admiral Bell and Flora Bannerworth revive the Hollandaise. To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.

Queen’s cockpit. Quietus. Quilkin. Hannah Haverkamp rejoins the Antiques Freaks to delve into the quirkiest letter of the nautical alphabet.

Our dear friend O F Cieri joins us once again for another thrilling chapter of the Victorian penny dreadful Varney the Vampire, wherein we enter a dark dank dungeon and behold the mysterious prisoner within... Check out O F Cieri's short speculative fiction and essays at ofcieri.com , and read her spooky alt-history novel BACKMASK!

A spooky gateway drug to ball-jointed dolls! Enjoy this 2010s fashion doll collectible with a robust secondhand market and delight in many monster puns in honor of the Halloween season.

If you’ve already  depressed yourself in looking up how much it cost to buy a house in the 1990s, consider doing the math for the price of a cottage! Once upon a time it was perfectly reasonable to spend the inflation-adjusted equivalent of fifty actual dollars on a single decorative spice jar for your proto-cottagecore kitchen. Now make it a whole set of spice jars sold through a subscription mod...

Behold! The twenty-eighth chapter of the Victorian penny dreadful Varney the Vampire, wherein we discover Mr. Marchdale's exculpation of himself, the search through the gardens, the spot of the deadly struggle, and the mysterious paper! To instantly unlock over a hundred more chapters (literally), check out our Patreon.